HONEST QUESTION: Are You Comfortable With Getting Old & Dying Alone?

Are You Comfortable With Dying Alone?


  • Total voters
    60

Elle Seven

Superstar
Joined
Mar 31, 2017
Messages
3,659
Reputation
2,439
Daps
15,151
I could wax poetic about how we all ultimately make that step alone anyway when the time comes...

But when I really think about it, I have to say no. That thought makes me very uncomfortable.

You have given me some food for thought though.

The only granny I ever knew ended up dying alone in a hospital bed 8 years ago.

My other granny died after a house fire...she wasn't alone because she wasn't the only one in the fire.

My only auntie, technically, died in bed while sleeping, but was officially pronounced dead at a hospital while on life support. She was surrounded by loved ones.

My granddaddy died in hospice years ago. I don't know if anyone was with him.

My granny-in-law had lots of love from her grandchildren but she ended up passing alone in a nursing home...well, not alone if you count the staff and her roommate.

My great-granny died 25 years ago at home, in her bed, surrounded by family -after my mama told the doctors she was hanging on because she wanted to go home and pass in her own house.


OP, you just made me realize there may be true privilege in getting the opportunity to pass surrounded by loved ones. I seriously had never thought of how many my people have passed "alone".

If I'm honest, more than even thinking that far ahead to my old age, I focus my thoughts more on staying alive to raise my kids now. I legitimately tell myself, "you must stay alive" on the regular lol. Hopefully in laying the foundations of love in my kids now in raising them, I'm also laying the foundations for gentler winter years in which they play a great part. Only time will tell, I guess.

I didn't mention my husband because, God willing, it's a given we will be getting on each other's nerve until one of us dies...but I guess time will tell on that one as well.
 

Bossino

Banned
Supporter
Joined
Oct 25, 2017
Messages
7,477
Reputation
2,895
Daps
24,292
Reppin
So Cal
It's funny you should say that. I hardly see those that fear death doing everything they can to make the most of their current one. They're not out there taking risks, pursuing their dreams, seeing the world, etc.

Perhaps it's the fact they've lead an unfulfilling life that drives the fear as they won't be able to make the most of it before it ends? I don't know...

Personally, it's when I left religion that I became my most happiest. I'm no longer concerned with a hereafter, or the idea of eternal damnation, nor do I let religious constraints hold me back/dictate how I should live my life. It's been absolutely liberating :blessed:

I'm agnostic, so while I value the principles of all religions (like the basic rules/guidelines/commandments) but my belief in a creator especially in the last half decade has been torpedoed so to speak. I feel many believe to avoid having to confront unpleasantries, as well as hold themselves and other accountable, but I'm just a breh so, all the religious folk don't need to get mad or convince otherwise, I'm not attacking nor trying to defend. Though in my younger days I'd be like do what I can and god got the rest, and I'd put my best foot forward shyt wouldn't pan out. Then as I grew older I became aware of the other concealed factors/variables to success and how deep certain rabbit holes go, it just made it illogical for me. Now I just plan for the worst and hope for the best and chalk everything in between that I even kinda messed up on to something I can improve going forward
:yeshrug:
 

Bossino

Banned
Supporter
Joined
Oct 25, 2017
Messages
7,477
Reputation
2,895
Daps
24,292
Reppin
So Cal
i used to feel the same way, fukk these nikkas I’m good on my own....then your fam start dying off and when you see them at the hospital and notice their surroundings...rooms full of patients left alone for days, no flowers, no cards, no old coworkers stopping thru to reminisce on old times, no laughter, no yelling at the kids to sit down it’s a damn hospital, nobody but that over worked nurse tending to you...and all she thinking about is checking on yo ass real quick cuz her shift almost over :ufdup::bryan:

that shyt ain’t the way to go out in this world brehs :hubie:It’s sad and painful to see.

but y’all do y’all I guess.

I see your point and I value it, I'm just feel like if I don't all the way fukk with somebody faking it for the sake of company is low key just cheating the both of us out of more meaningful connections. Plus I have a rambly/active mind so I've gone days where I said less than a 100 words (bare minimums to deal with neighbors/cashiers) and I felt fine. I guess I'm distant in that way
 

Bossino

Banned
Supporter
Joined
Oct 25, 2017
Messages
7,477
Reputation
2,895
Daps
24,292
Reppin
So Cal
If you believe that thoughts create reality, then that is what you will end up with. Be upfront and straightforward. Most people don’t ask blunt questions before marriage. Talk about money. You’ll notice how she feels about money when dating. I’m not talking about going out to dinner. I mean she’s asking for Chanel bags, and expecting you to pay her bills, or give her money.

In that case

:camby:

Just don’t go into it thinking there is a limited supply of women. If one throws up red flags, get rid of her.

Oh most definitely I've been on that way good breh, but I'm 1/140, as it stands at a certain point you get tired of looking through women you end up bushing. I've also learned women can play coy, conceal undesirable traits for quite some time especially if you taking care of them in the bedroom but eventually it comes out, but how long that takes, and how many times I'm trying to do that are the primary problems
 

Swirv

Superstar
Supporter
Joined
Jul 1, 2012
Messages
17,717
Reputation
3,051
Daps
56,049
Not if I have my way. I want to say goodbye to all my loved ones before I pass and thank them for loving me and let them know I love them one last time.

I got to say goodbye to a dear friend and thank him in his last minutes and I could see in his eyes how much that meant.
 

Mastamimd

Ain't shyt
Joined
Mar 11, 2013
Messages
32,232
Reputation
12,069
Daps
135,363
Reppin
Houston
I've all but given up. I'm 100 percent certain that I'm going to die alone, and I'm fine with that. I'm lonely as hell as it if right now, most of my friends have moved on or have families, and now I just have family. I'm done exerting energy finding someone only to fall flat on my face. I was alone most of my life anyway.
 

Bossino

Banned
Supporter
Joined
Oct 25, 2017
Messages
7,477
Reputation
2,895
Daps
24,292
Reppin
So Cal
I say this all the time and women collectively begin to lose their shyt, I’m sorry but I’m not stopping or putting my life on hold because I know at the end of it all it will kill me inside to have to try and realize the things that I truly aspired for
On the flip side of the coin I don't want a woman to change for me either. Yes you compromise on differences, but certain things just aren't up for debate, we had to share those things period. I'm almost sure that finding a woman that fundamentally aligns with my beliefs without convincing/coddling/me leading her in that direction is improbable as many of my stances aren't commonly held or are considered dated to some degree. It is what it is.
:francis:
 

Dolla$

Minus the bullsh*t...life's great
Joined
Jul 8, 2014
Messages
5,304
Reputation
305
Daps
15,330
Just because you have a wife and kid don’t mean you’re not gonna die alone

my uncle passed away from COVID and he was by himself. Mind you he has a bunch of kids, grandkids, nephews and nieces. shyt broke my heart to pieces
 

Loken

Superstar
Joined
Sep 27, 2015
Messages
2,405
Reputation
1,760
Daps
12,547
i've been a loner all my life never really had many friends so this was always gonna be the case for me

after watching/taking care of my sister while she was slowly dying from cancer over a year fukk yes im fine dying alone

that just reinforced my opinion on it fukk putting somebody else though something like that :mjcry:
 

Deflatedhoopdreams

Veteran
Supporter
Joined
May 29, 2012
Messages
35,860
Reputation
7,030
Daps
76,096
Reppin
The Rucker
I don’t know if I would wanna die around my family. Seeing a family member die traumatized me.

Nah it’s beautiful. The day my grandma died we were all there in the room. Her daughter. Grandkids great grand kids. She was medicated to where she was basically sleeping and we were all there to see her go.

She was there for about a week before she died and everyone came to see her before she died days leading up to her death.

Death at a old age is beautiful and seeing someone make it out this life to the other side is just a way of life but having loved ones there is great.

And so instead of sendin' flowers, we the roses

I smile when roses come to see me
And I, can't wait for a sunny day (seeing it through your eyes)
Can't wait for the clouds to break



:blessed::blessed:
 
Top