Just got divorced after 12 yrs...ama

[Chrishaune]

Once you realize most of these women are damaged and not marriage material........A lot of times it might not necessarily be all of their fault. The environment that raised them was more than likely demonic....

Goes for men as well...

 

[HARLEM AL]

Did you see her response to me?

She starts off pretending to be innocent then proceeds to place all the blame on him again. She literally starts off saying she’s not blaming him then spent every sentence after implying he’s wrong because he had 2 kids from a failed relationship.

And that was her being “objective”

Maybe us men be on the mans side sometimes but we’ll be quick to say a dude is wrong when he is. A man got a good woman and don’t appreciate her we be quick to hit him with the

The only women here who hold women accountable are @Nicole0416 and @HarlemHottie

This shyt is ridiculous

And what really gets me is women are wild catty and petty towards one another but form like voltron when it comes to defending one against a straight man

No lies told!

 

[Apollo Creed]

Once you realize most of these women are damaged and not marriage material........A lot of times it might not necessarily be all of their fault. The environment that raised them was more than likely demonic....

Goes for men as well...

this is why its best to just identify something isn't working, and cut losses rather than fight a losing battle. If only 1 side is saying "how can we make it past this" while the other side has become distant or "indifferent" then that is a red flag. If you have issues and both sides acknowledge and take steps to make it past that roadblock then that is what you stay and fight for. NOBODY is perfect, but you cant be in a team and the other person isn't willing to run plays to win, yet when you lose they want to blame the other players.

 

[TRUEST]

The bold sounds like you don't own a home or been responsible for running one by yourself. Being handy is just as much a requirement of "homemaking" as cleaning. With that one statement, in my eyes, you have expressed the hypocrisy of modern day men. You want a "traditional" woman to perform a litany of duties while the only thing you're offering is bill money in the form of long work hours. The financial part of any relationship is the EASIEST and I don't feel many of you are matching the level you want in return.

Wow. The irrational reason of the modern woman on full display here.
If the financial part is the easiest it’s only fair the woman take ownership of that then while the man stays home and becomes the home maker.

 

[NormanConnors]

Women are not riders. They switch up as soon as shyt gets even a little uncomfortable. doesn’t matter if you put your all in or not

Facts, the emotional imbalance can be to deal with at times.

 

[Ya?]

Did you see her response to me?

She starts off pretending to be innocent then proceeds to place all the blame on him again. She literally starts off saying she’s not blaming him then spent every sentence after implying he’s wrong because he had 2 kids from a failed relationship.

And that was her being “objective”

Maybe us men be on the mans side sometimes but we’ll be quick to say a dude is wrong when he is. A man got a good woman and don’t appreciate her we be quick to hit him with the

The only women here who hold women accountable are @Nicole0416 and @HarlemHottie

This shyt is ridiculous

And what really gets me is women are wild catty and petty towards one another but form like voltron when it comes to defending one against a straight man

Because I am not blaming, and I dont need to pretend of being innocent. You are making up lies to suit your own narrative.

Yes it is important to know why anyone has 2 failed relationships and they are the common denominator.

 

[Ya?]

i knew your would come in here and try flipping this on men. You’re so biased and one sided in these convos that I can’t even have legit dialogue with you.

And have you read the thread fully? A lot of points you make have been addressed or doesn’t pertain to the OP story

You came out the gate with the “I’m a woman hear me ROAR!!” Type shyt

Has anyone read the thread carefully? I replied to the post I read. Does this forum ever read all pages of the thread before responding.

I see what you’re saying. But I’m sure he let her know that he would be working more hours etc. she should have had an idea of his work and lifestyle.

So you dont know if he did, you assume they had that conversation. Hence my earlier point, there was a clear breakdown somewhere.

 

[jwonder]

Just got out of an 11 yr marriage myself..

The house that I bought with my 401k (that I'm still paying back) it's for her n the kids now

Paying 800 a month child support


Can't even claim 1 of them on the income tax get about 2000 compared to her 10,000 every year


Now stuck living in a efficiency in east Miramar u ready for this life playboy? It's cheaper to keep her who ever said that shyt knew what time it was.

Umm in South FL? Damn that is one of the worst places to get divorced. shyt it's the worst places to get married Crazy I had a homie years ago that went through damn near the same situation. Lived in E. Miramar in an efficiency too. It would be crazy if ya'll lived in the same one.

 

[Apollo Creed]

Umm in South FL? Damn that is one of the worst places to get divorced. shyt it's the worst places to get married Crazy I had a homie years ago that went through damn near the same situation. Lived in E. Miramar in an efficiency too. It would be crazy if ya'll lived in the same one.

what is an 'efficiency'?

 

[Youseenmywork]

Once you realize most of these women are damaged and not marriage material........A lot of times it might not necessarily be all of their fault. The environment that raised them was more than likely demonic....

Goes for men as well...

Naw fam it's no excuses . If I as a man can take responsibility and go get help if need be than women can do it to . It they mothers job to turn them into wife material it not a man's job . A lot of these women need help but want go get due to pride or ego but will try to get into another relationship ...funny

 

[Ya?]

This is the problem with the small contingency..
Of female posters that actually post..
Y’all continuously goalpost move/shift blame..
To the narratives you have already confirmed in your head..
There is no middle ground with you all..
You only see things through your lens and that’s it..
One moment..
A man needs to be ambitious/financially secure..
So when brehs hit you with logic/debunk your hypocrisy/give you insight to the male mind..
Well you aren’t handy enough..
That’s the true sign of a real man..
Then when brehs give you that work again..
It’s more goalpost moving..
Y’all ain’t man enough anyways..
You want renaissance men but can’t even fix a nikka a turkey club sandwich..
Or..
Name his favorite drink..
You want a Superman that works on old time values..
But lord forbid if we ask you to iron our work shirt..
Women want equality without the luxury of accountability..
What man wants to come home to this type of thinking..
I know you will move goalposts again(you always do)..
Good Day..

You think men sees it from the lens of women?

You spin a whole narrative that the OP did not say because of hangups you have about something else and thats the problem with posters such as yourself. Y'all come in these threads with your minds made up about women rather than questioning what the man actually wrote.

But somehow I am moving the goal post, what does the bolded have anything to do with anything pertaining to this thread?

 

[Ya?]

As a woman, this is what scares me about getting married.

To me, in these times - people are quicker to leave - which depending on the marriage - it can be good or bad.

I have been in long-term relationships - where we wanted to take the next step - but then we would see friends and family who were together less time than we were -- get married and divorced - while we were still together.

Honestly, I'm OK with just being committed to each other - no paperwork - so when he's ready or I'm ready to be done. We can just do that.

Even living together, I prefer we both keep our own spots - makes things so much easier if things come to an end - or if someone needs some air.

thats not a relationship, its having 1 foot in and 1 foot out.

 

[xoxodede]

thats not a relationship, its having 1 foot in and 1 foot out.

To YOU. Sis, mind your business

 

[Lamar Givens]

In the past, women were TRAINED to be homemakers, mainly through force and from a young age. I’m sorry women are no longer being forced to marry some 40 year old at 15 or born into a poor family with a slew of kids, that the older ones are responsible for.

Y’all want a woman to be traditional while y’all apply toxic, westernized ideals of male leadership and confused why there is an issue. Very few of y’all are even raising your daughters to be home makers, yet mad at women today for not being them.

This isn’t Iran or Saudi Arabia, heck just 40-50 years ago women were trained to be homemakers and NOT wedded to someone who could be their father.

The problem in this country (America) is that men and women no longer hold to strong MORAL values.

When everyone is out her having casual sex left and right, creating fatherless homes, then women have to take on both gender roles and pass these traits down to their daughters and sons.

This is a perpetual cycle where both men and women are to blame for their lack of moral righteousness and raising families the correct way.

Add in demonic feminism and it’s lie to women that they don’t need men, easy no fault divorce, and government assistance that encourages keeping men out of the home, women are bombarded with turning away from what they were created to be AND THAT IS A HELP MATE!

I don’t need or want a boss b**** with money and attitude.

I need a woman who is going to know her ROLE and NOT ADD to my already stress as a black man in this world.

 

[jwonder]

what is an 'efficiency'?

It's a converted garage. AC is usually a window one. Some people want like 800 a month down there. Most don't even come with a kitchenette.