Just lost my dad to lung cancer…how do you deal with losing a parent?

The Half-Blood FKA Prince

Smiley my avi :nosaiyans:
Joined
May 24, 2022
Messages
775
Reputation
430
Daps
2,302
This is the worst feeling I have ever felt. My pops taught me everything on how to be man and how to do right. I was by his side all the time nikka was my best friend…how do you cope with this shyt ???
Time, prayer, and liberal amounts of thc and/or alcoholic beverages throughout that time is the only thing that kept me sane. Granted i was 13 and 14 when my folks passed.

For what its worth im sorry for ur loss breh, and may the Lord bless u and the fam with plentiful healing energy.

We all gotta go some day breh, and i know for a fact we gone see each other on the other side some day. But in the mean time he will be with u even if u cant see or hear him. As someone somewhat plugged in to the spiritual world i can assure u its real breh.
 

The Half-Blood FKA Prince

Smiley my avi :nosaiyans:
Joined
May 24, 2022
Messages
775
Reputation
430
Daps
2,302
You have to cry bro if you need to. What pops meant was to cry but keep your dignity and don't fall apart. The crying has to eventually stop and you have to continue your journey without his physical presence. He wants to know that he raised a resilient son.


I didn't cry when my mom died. I didn't cry during the lead up to her funeral. It took until about a week after the funeral for all the pent up emotions I had been carrying to come flooding out. I was just numb from the moment she died until the funeral. I can't even explain why because I don't know.
This. No shame in crying fam especially under these type of circumstances. Do what u gotta do, the enlightenment he will have received from being in the Lord's very presence will have made him understand that by now, so it is ok.
 

Carolina Slim

Superstar
Joined
May 1, 2012
Messages
8,766
Reputation
1,675
Daps
28,677
Reppin
Raleigh by way of Crooklyn
Even towards the end he was telling me " don't do none of tnay crying shyt " so that’s what I’m trying to do . I’m sending my prayers and love to everyone this holiday season..enjoy your people blood or not enjoy them…

You have to cry bro if you need to. What pops meant was to cry but keep your dignity and don't fall apart. The crying has to eventually stop and you have to continue your journey without his physical presence. He wants to know that he raised a resilient son.


I didn't cry when my mom died. I didn't cry during the lead up to her funeral. It took until about a week after the funeral for all the pent up emotions I had been carrying to come flooding out. I was just numb from the moment she died until the funeral. I can't even explain why because I don't know.
Word... Condolences on the loss of your father, my dude. May his memory comfort you and your family and all who knew and loved him.

My pops couldn't talk near the end, but he would communicate with me with his eyes. I could tell when he would hold my hand in his hospital bed and grip it with the strength he could muster that it was on me to be the man and hold things down for my mother. He passed on October 26, 2003. I didn't cry right away; I had been kind of prepared for the eventuality because he had been in the hospital for almost two months. It didn't hit me until like a couple weeks after his memorial; I was driving down Flushing Ave. by where I grew up. And out of nowhere, I'm at the light crying like a baby. It was so wild that even as I'm sitting there I'm like :wtf: to myself. The next time it hit me was on Thanksgiving. He always made the turkey and stuffing and everything. So on Thanksgiving, I decide to try my hand at it. I got the stuff, and I prepared it the night before. As I was cooking, the apartment started to smell like the apartment I grew up in in Bushwick Houses, and the smells started hitting me in a way I didn't expect. I sat down at the kitchen and started bawling as those memories of my pops flooded back. Even today, I woke up and realized what day it was, and I started thinking about him, still remembering the smells of that day.
 

Mowgli

Veteran
Joined
May 1, 2012
Messages
92,624
Reputation
11,372
Daps
215,213
Understand the cycle of life.

Once a man twice a baby.

Hold onto the love and try to right the wrongs of your pops and honor him by doing the right thing.
 

Imer

Pro
Joined
Jun 14, 2012
Messages
659
Reputation
110
Daps
1,532
Was in the same exact boat in 2001 pops passed at 57 I was 19. Can’t say it gets easier but you just get use to it. You will get in a new routine to keep busy, and just try to do right by him. Sorry for your loss. Plenty of songs and a good drive comes in handy also.
 

Giselle

**********
Joined
Nov 19, 2013
Messages
10,764
Reputation
1,912
Daps
18,956
Even towards the end he was telling me " don't do none of tnay crying shyt " so that’s what I’m trying to do . I’m sending my prayers and love to everyone this holiday season..enjoy your people blood or not enjoy them…
It’s ok to cry

ETA: why is everybody daddy dead in here? That’s so sad. Y’all making it seem common. I’m so fortunate I haven’t had to experience loss of a parent yet. I hope they get to see my kids kids when I have them.
 

Carolina Slim

Superstar
Joined
May 1, 2012
Messages
8,766
Reputation
1,675
Daps
28,677
Reppin
Raleigh by way of Crooklyn
It’s ok to cry

ETA: why is everybody daddy dead in here? That’s so sad. Y’all making it seem common. I’m so fortunate I haven’t had to experience loss of a parent yet. I hope they get to see my kids kids when I have them.

My son was three when my pops passed; he has a few memories of him. My wife was pregnant with my youngest when he passed; he came four months later. The funny thing about that, my moms was holding him in the delivery room, and she looks at me and said, "he looks like your Daddy". I was like, "yeah" but inside I'm like "he just look like a newborn"... As he got older, he started taking on some of my pops' attributes. One day I I noticed he even chewed his food like him, and I was staring at him like :ohhh:To this day my mother still talks to them about him, keeping his memory alive for one, and letting the other know he was proud of him before he even came into the world.
 

LauderdaleBoss

#TunnelGang #RingGangRadio
Staff member
Joined
May 9, 2012
Messages
17,078
Reputation
4,695
Daps
52,296
Reppin
Lauderdale
This is the worst feeling I have ever felt. My pops taught me everything on how to be man and how to do right. I was by his side all the time nikka was my best friend…how do you cope with this shyt ???

Sorry for your loss fam. R.I.P. to your pop dukes. This shyt is hard and life will never be the same. Just be strong.

I lost mine the day before father's day this year and shyt still got me fukked up. shyt was soooo unexpected cuz it happened at a time I was already going through a lot of difficult shyt. My pops was my best friend and my real life hero. We did damn near everything together.

As for coping. I cry everyday and was doing counseling, but that hasn't been helpful at all and it stopped this week.
 

Lord Beerus

#CatSet General | Professional dog slapper
Joined
Jun 14, 2018
Messages
5,772
Reputation
4,983
Daps
50,282
Reppin
Elsweyr
I'm so sorry for your loss breh. My father passed recently, we all grieve in different ways. What might have helped me might not work for you. I will say that make sure you have a healthy way to cope/deal with the grief. First thing needed is a clear mind so you can process everything.
 

BeingBetter

Hope Your Day Gets Better !
Supporter
Joined
Oct 10, 2017
Messages
1,817
Reputation
605
Daps
7,516
Reppin
Georgia, USA
This is the worst feeling I have ever felt. My pops taught me everything on how to be man and how to do right. I was by his side all the time nikka was my best friend…how do you cope with this shyt ???
I am sorry that you are going through this at this time. Your Father was a good man and all the wisdom and knowledge that he taught you should be passed down to all the generations that follow. You can keep his legacy alive by utilizing and accomplishing those ideals and tools that he handed you. I send my prayers and blessings. Stay strong, your family will need your strength.
 
Top