Keep It Real: Have any of you ever practiced COLORISM?

Matt504

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No you can’t. But you can observe and analyze a phenomenon and it’s origins to help those impacted by the ignorance. And it’s good to dig deeply into the psychology of it. Many dark-skinned people have been made to feel like it’s something wrong with them. Like they just ugly.

NOPE. By establishing the psychology behind self-hate, we learn all kinds of interesting things that can help generations avoid these pitfalls in the future.

Threads like this are always interesting, especially when juxtaposed with threads about racism. You'd be called a c00n in record time if you came into a thread about a police officer shooting a Black man, for example, and saying something like "If we know how the police are, why don't we just comply when we're pulled over"

What's pretty obvious at this point is people don't care about things like this unless they are directly affected by them. Which is why the same dismissive attitudes people have in this thread about colorism are nearly identical to the attitudes white people have when confronted with topics about racism.

:francis:
 
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No you can’t. But you can observe and analyze a phenomenon and it’s origins to help those impacted by the ignorance. And it’s good to dig deeply into the psychology of it. Many dark-skinned people have been made to feel like it’s something wrong with them. Like they just ugly.

NOPE. By establishing the psychology behind self-hate, we learn all kinds of interesting things that can help generations avoid these pitfalls in the future.


That won't change people personal preference tho.


Also it's hard to determine when it's self hate or not


Some black men like Hispanic lightskin etc and it got nothing to do with self hate


I think dark women better off getting people who appreciate them


Just like reject nice guys


Worrying about others issues won't help urs

Cause people do all types of things for different reasons

This isn't a one shoe fits all issue
 

Tair

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Threads like this are always interesting, especially when juxtaposed with threads about racism. You'd be called a c00n in record time if you came into a thread about a police officer shooting a Black man, for example, and saying something like "If we know how the police are, why don't we just comply when we're pulled over"

What's pretty obvious at this point is people don't care about things like this unless they are directly affected by them. Which is why the same dismissive attitudes people have in this thread about colorism are nearly identical to the attitudes white people have when confronted with topics about racism.

:francis:

That gentleman guy is the same person that believes Black people will undergo a genocide in America 4-5x greater than Nazi Germany in the next 10 years.

Keep that in mind when he quotes you.
 

The Gentleman

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@Booksnrain


You: I got a friend I want you to me.

Dude: you got a picture?

You: here

Dude: damn, she black as shyt. Not my thing.

You: Oh Damn!


Outside shaming what would you do in that situation?
 

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That won't change people personal preference tho.


Also it's hard to determine when it's self hate or not


Some black men like Hispanic lightskin etc and it got nothing to do with self hate


I think dark women better off getting people who appreciate them


Just like reject nice guys


Worrying about others issues won't help urs

Cause people do all types of things for different reasons

This isn't a one shoe fits all issue
Nah I know plenty of darker women who have said that they benefitted from hearing other women speak on their experiences too. Nobody is obligated to worry about the discourse. They can exit the conversation if it bothers them. But others will continue to highlight the psychology behind it and benefit from the insights they get into the human psyche of people who hate and avoid phenotypic biological markers of their own appearance in others. It’s a great teachable moment and a psychologists wet dream.
 

The Gentleman

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That gentleman guy is the same person that believes Black people will undergo a genocide in America 4-5x greater than Nazi Germany in the next 10 years.

Keep that in mind when he quotes you.


Stop putting words in my mouth like sucker.
 

Fillerguy

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Yes. It started in my 20s... I pretty much ignore light skin girls or treat them like the brehs. I'm dark as hell. Unfortunately, this backfired for a bit. Some women like that/expect this behavior from dark skinned dudes. I just avoid them now like I do white women.

I only do this because light skinned girls tend to be the most drama seeking of them all. Especially when they're biracial. I can't afford to have this in my life. I got family like this already. I can't.
 

old boy

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throughout my life i have never been accused of it because my favorite since childhood has always been brown to dark with 4 type hair over the ever popular mixed exotical minority of our community. think whitney, karyn white, sheryl lee ralph, angela bassett, megan thee stallion, jill marie jones etc and you on it. that's just what i find most beautiful. if anything i have been used by female friends & family members as the example of what a black man tastes should be which can get uncomfortable for me. it starts to become a thing where the only men who are allowed to love them some redbones are white men & then if the white man wifes meghan markle or halle berry those same sistas will flip it & start calling the redbone exxotical a black queen who proves white men want black women. but i digress lol... now here's where i possibly get exposed & it can get mad sketchy.....

i am in no way attracted to the model nyakim gatwetch. as a matter of fact coli search the thread entitled "girl with the darkest skin on earth" in april of 2020 & check my post #151 where i not only dis her but name her complexion as one of the things i find unattractive. a great sin i realize, especially as a self professed conscious person but i kept it a buck regardless. it actually led to an offline debate about her & my views on complexion with my lady & her sister surprisingly taking my side while their fat childhood friend (all of them fba, i'm caribbean) was foaming at the mouth calling me colorist because i don't fukk with nyakim or her complexion. so the line can become blurry. here's that thread for reference & yes there were black men in that thread who got very angry with me & defended nyakim while also accusing me of being a light skin loving colorist who is dissing dark sistas. matter of fact here's the link, you be the judge:


 

Gloxina

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This question is for the dudes and the ladies.

Have you ever discriminated against the opposite sex because wthey were too dark or light?

I can't recall one moment in my life where I've passed a women up because of her complexion. Personally I'm a dark skin breh and have gotten play from all types of women. However the ones that did pass me up due to my complexion were usually other dark skin women or brown skin women. And they were very explicit about it.

From what I've seen a lot black men are colorstruck. I use to deny that was the case but its true. I've spoken to a lot of ds women and they all have had experiences where black men have derogatory comments about their complexion. Even more concerning is the amount of black male celebrities who've publicly humiliated ds women for no reason. Its sickening to me and can kind of understand why so many ds women in particular are swirlers. We have to do better. I can't think of a more ignorant reason not to date someone.
I actually appreciate you acknowledging this, because BS & DS women are constantly being gaslit over this topic. I just gave up.

If a breh says anything about my skin color I just make a mental note to never see him again. 🤷🏾‍♀️
“I don’t usually date girls with your complexion”
“Oh I can still see your veins”
“You’re not that dark”
“Yea light skinned girls are just too stuck up.”
“You’re a pretty black girl; you’d have cute kids”.
If you’re brown with straight or curly hair they’ll ask what you’re mixed with because you can’t be pretty and full Black.

Apparently Black girls in HS and college are making this ish up though, so nvm :coffee:
 

The Gentleman

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I actually appreciate you acknowledging this, because BS & DS women are constantly being gaslit over this topic. I just gave up.

If a breh says anything about my skin color I just make a mental note to never see him again. 🤷🏾‍♀️
“I don’t usually date girls with your complexion”
“Oh I can still see your veins”
“You’re not that dark”
“Yea light skinned girls are just too stuck up.”
“You’re a pretty black girl; you’d have cute kids”.
If you’re brown with straight or curly hair they’ll ask what you’re mixed with because you can’t be pretty and full Black.

Apparently Black girls in HS and college are making this ish up though, so nvm :coffee:


There are a lot of black women across the color spectrum that are colored struck too. This is not just a black man problem. I know plenty of girls who went out of their way to have children by light-skinned men.


Y’all really need to get over these childhood traumas and become adults.
 

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@Booksnrain


You: I got a friend I want you to me.

Dude: you got a picture?

You: here

Dude: damn, she black as shyt. Not my thing.

You: Oh Damn!



Outside shaming what would you do in that situation?
Lmao! Why are we so protective of people with ignorant hot takes? “Other than shaming…”:mjlol:
But to be honest, I’ve BEEN in this situation. The guy apologized on some “no offense to u babe” type deal. But then we had a really interesting conversation on why he had an aversion to dark skin on a female. Some of what he said was surprisingly introspective. We talked about some historical factors. How men in his family influences his preferences. How celebrities always seemed to put exoticals as a prize. And he even said he’d been attracted to darker chicks b4 but got clowned by his boys. All shyt I’ve seen.
It’s just very interesting to get to the bottom of the internal associations we have with others when it comes to attraction.:yeshrug:
In the end, he did say he didn’t ridicule or harrass chicks like that b/c that stuff ain’t the wave. And it not being the wave anymore for him was due to increased awareness of the stuff from Tik toks he’d seen.:deadrose:
Like I said. Cultural shifts start small.
 
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