Random Swagless Moments You Remember About Yourself

[bogey_j]

So I take this girl I have been seeing for like two week. .

Curly hair with that innocent look to her.

But she is not the type to give it up right away she told me this.

So last Saturday, I take her to buffalo wild wings. We share a plate of Mango Habanero wings since we both like it spicy.

We chalking it up, laughing the whole night and she is feeling me right.

We get to the car and I was driving her home but we get lost along the way and I stop the car to get the GPS going.

Then she starts to give me the look, biting her bottom lip, I go for the kill and start kissing her.

She kisses back, I insert my tongue in her mouth. she is receptive.

After about ten minutes of this, we drive back to her apartment with my hands on her thighs which eventually led to me rubbing her coooch through her leggings.

I park in front of her building, by that time we were hot and heavy into it. Tonguing, rubbing, gropping jerking with the Windows fogging up, by now my only worry was the police knocking on the window but I didn't care.

She then takes off her leggings and she is only in her panties now, I wanted to go upstairs (Don't need a public indecency charge on me) but I didn't want to ruin the moment, so I played along.

She then pushes my hand down to her p*ssy under neath the panties and I proceed to finger her. We were doing this like five minutes.

then she says



Her: ............ It is burning

Me: .. what is burning? ... *proceeding to work the magic with my fingers*

Her: It is burning *pointing to her cooch*

Me: *Thinking This chick got some STD*

Her: Stop!!! Did you wash her hands after we ate those wings

Me: I wiped them clean

Her: *sucks her teeth* I got to go upstairs. *puts on her leggings and boots and proceeds to run upstairs *




She didn't come back after like an hour, I call her, she didn't pick up. Don't remember her exact apartment number so I didn't go in looking for her. I then leave.

Tried to call her again she didn't pick up.

so you didnt wash your hands breh?

 

[Shogun]

so i've been dating this girl for a few weeks. she is by far one of the hottest girls i've ever dated. definitely top 3 of all time. like, i know how fortunate i am to be dating her right now.

anyways, she knows that i want to fukk her. like so bad. and she's been fukking with my head about it though. i haven't hit it yet, but gotten so damn close. like making out and under the clothes touching, but every time we almost get to doing it, she stops and keeps withholding from me. i think she gets off on my torture, but i'm cool with it.

then the other night happened. we went on a date and went back to her place afterward. in her ultimate move to fukk with me, she said "let me put on a show for you"; and started stripping. and got naked, she then got on her bed, and took out her dildo. it was fukking huge and black. anyways, she started fukking herself with it in front of me. it was so awesome. it was like those online videos, but in real person. i can't describe how sexy it was. needless to say, i had a raging boner and couldn't take it anymore.

i told her that she needed the real deal and went over to her on the bed. she then stopped me and said "i'll play with your toy.... if you play with my toy"; i was like, WTF? then she simultaneously put her lips on my dikk and put the dildo to my lips. "suck it"; she said. "i'll suck yours";. oh my god. it was weird. like, i was just so horny, and wanted her to suck me dikk so bad, that i just went with it. then she started moving that shyt in and out of my mouth, like, really mouth fukking me with a black dildo while she sucked my dikk. i had a brief moment of "this shyts gay"; but i didnt want her to stop giving me head. before i knew it, i couldn't help it, and i came. with a dildo in my mouth.

does that make me gay?

 

[sfgiants]

so i've been dating this girl for a few weeks. she is by far one of the hottest girls i've ever dated. definitely top 3 of all time. like, i know how fortunate i am to be dating her right now.

anyways, she knows that i want to fukk her. like so bad. and she's been fukking with my head about it though. i haven't hit it yet, but gotten so damn close. like making out and under the clothes touching, but every time we almost get to doing it, she stops and keeps withholding from me. i think she gets off on my torture, but i'm cool with it.

then the other night happened. we went on a date and went back to her place afterward. in her ultimate move to fukk with me, she said "let me put on a show for you"; and started stripping. and got naked, she then got on her bed, and took out her dildo. it was fukking huge and black. anyways, she started fukking herself with it in front of me. it was so awesome. it was like those online videos, but in real person. i can't describe how sexy it was. needless to say, i had a raging boner and couldn't take it anymore.

i told her that she needed the real deal and went over to her on the bed. she then stopped me and said "i'll play with your toy.... if you play with my toy"; i was like, WTF? then she simultaneously put her lips on my dikk and put the dildo to my lips. "suck it"; she said. "i'll suck yours";. oh my god. it was weird. like, i was just so horny, and wanted her to suck me dikk so bad, that i just went with it. then she started moving that shyt in and out of my mouth, like, really mouth fukking me with a black dildo while she sucked my dikk. i had a brief moment of "this shyts gay"; but i didnt want her to stop giving me head. before i knew it, i couldn't help it, and i came. with a dildo in my mouth.

does that make me gay?

lmaooo i dont care if this is true or not, this sht is hilarious.
son was fellashing a huge dildo, and at the same time

should've tossed her dildo across the room and buried your fukkstick in her larynx breh

 

[Don Dada F Poppa]

so i've been dating this girl for a few weeks. she is by far one of the hottest girls i've ever dated. definitely top 3 of all time. like, i know how fortunate i am to be dating her right now.

anyways, she knows that i want to fukk her. like so bad. and she's been fukking with my head about it though. i haven't hit it yet, but gotten so damn close. like making out and under the clothes touching, but every time we almost get to doing it, she stops and keeps withholding from me. i think she gets off on my torture, but i'm cool with it.

then the other night happened. we went on a date and went back to her place afterward. in her ultimate move to fukk with me, she said "let me put on a show for you"; and started stripping. and got naked, she then got on her bed, and took out her dildo. it was fukking huge and black. anyways, she started fukking herself with it in front of me. it was so awesome. it was like those online videos, but in real person. i can't describe how sexy it was. needless to say, i had a raging boner and couldn't take it anymore.

i told her that she needed the real deal and went over to her on the bed. she then stopped me and said "i'll play with your toy.... if you play with my toy"; i was like, WTF? then she simultaneously put her lips on my dikk and put the dildo to my lips. "suck it"; she said. "i'll suck yours";. oh my god. it was weird. like, i was just so horny, and wanted her to suck my d1ck so bad, that i just went with it. then she started moving that sh1t in and out of my mouth, like, really mouth fukking me with a black dildo while she sucked my d1ck. i had a brief moment of "this shyts gay"; but i didnt want her to stop giving me head. before i knew it, i couldn't help it, and i came. with a dildo in my mouth.

does that make me gay?

get that copy and paste story the fukk outta here breh

 

[gangreen]

so you didnt wash your hands breh?

I forgot and to my credit, I don't remember her doing it either.

This is the swagless moments thread . not my proudest moment , u live and you learn

 

[gangreen]

so i've been dating this girl for a few weeks. she is by far one of the hottest girls i've ever dated. definitely top 3 of all time. like, i know how fortunate i am to be dating her right now.

anyways, she knows that i want to fukk her. like so bad. and she's been fukking with my head about it though. i haven't hit it yet, but gotten so damn close. like making out and under the clothes touching, but every time we almost get to doing it, she stops and keeps withholding from me. i think she gets off on my torture, but i'm cool with it.

then the other night happened. we went on a date and went back to her place afterward. in her ultimate move to fukk with me, she said "let me put on a show for you"; and started stripping. and got naked, she then got on her bed, and took out her dildo. it was fukking huge and black. anyways, she started fukking herself with it in front of me. it was so awesome. it was like those online videos, but in real person. i can't describe how sexy it was. needless to say, i had a raging boner and couldn't take it anymore.

i told her that she needed the real deal and went over to her on the bed. she then stopped me and said "i'll play with your toy.... if you play with my toy"; i was like, WTF? then she simultaneously put her lips on my dikk and put the dildo to my lips. "suck it"; she said. "i'll suck yours";. oh my god. it was weird. like, i was just so horny, and wanted her to suck my d1ck so bad, that i just went with it. then she started moving that sh1t in and out of my mouth, like, really mouth fukking me with a black dildo while she sucked my d1ck. i had a brief moment of "this shyts gay"; but i didnt want her to stop giving me head. before i knew it, i couldn't help it, and i came. with a dildo in my mouth.

does that make me gay?

 

[bogey_j]

I forgot and to my credit, I don't remember her doing it either.

This is the swagless moments thread . not my proudest moment , u live and you learn

thats beyond swagless my dude, that shyts just unsanitary

at sticking spicy chicken fingers in someones p*ssy. you deserved to be cut off after that one

 

[newworldafro]

so i've been dating this girl for a few weeks. she is by far one of the hottest girls i've ever dated. definitely top 3 of all time. like, i know how fortunate i am to be dating her right now.

anyways, she knows that i want to fukk her. like so bad. and she's been fukking with my head about it though. i haven't hit it yet, but gotten so damn close. like making out and under the clothes touching, but every time we almost get to doing it, she stops and keeps withholding from me. i think she gets off on my torture, but i'm cool with it.

then the other night happened. we went on a date and went back to her place afterward. in her ultimate move to fukk with me, she said "let me put on a show for you"; and started stripping. and got naked, she then got on her bed, and took out her dildo. it was fukking huge and black. anyways, she started fukking herself with it in front of me. it was so awesome. it was like those online videos, but in real person. i can't describe how sexy it was. needless to say, i had a raging boner and couldn't take it anymore.

i told her that she needed the real deal and went over to her on the bed. she then stopped me and said "i'll play with your toy.... if you play with my toy"; i was like, WTF? then she simultaneously put her lips on my dikk and put the dildo to my lips. "suck it"; she said. "i'll suck yours";. oh my god. it was weird. like, i was just so horny, and wanted her to suck my d1ck so bad, that i just went with it. then she started moving that sh1t in and out of my mouth, like, really mouth fukking me with a black dildo while she sucked my d1ck. i had a brief moment of "this shyts gay"; but i didnt want her to stop giving me head. before i knew it, i couldn't help it, and i came. with a dildo in my mouth.

does that make me gay?

Starts out for me as typical story of bad bytch that everyone from HS wanted. For me we had a class together and by the grace of god sat next to her and we actually talked a lot. She was mad flirty. Even was partners on a project once and met up after school to work on it. I was feelin myself because every nikka at school wanted to hit that

Fast forward to lunch one day.. One or two day a week a bunch of dudes would met up in the gym at lunch for a pickup game. We were playing and shorty walked in with a couple of her dime friends. I immediately turn on my playoff intensity and start demanding the ball everytime down and going crazy on D slapping the court and shyt I was growling at nikkas and yelling at people loud enough so she could here. I was basically on some heavy Kobe type shyt.

So the bell rings and we do last shot wins. I demand the ball, take a nikka one on one and pull up for a 3 at the top of the key which is a AIR BALL. They come down and dude goes on one with me. nikka broke my fukkin ankles. Crosses me up so bad I go stumbling back and fall and he nails a J. shyt looked exactly like Kyrie crossing up dude at the all star game. I walked outta the gym like without even looking in girls direction.

Turns out she was only there to check out my homie who she had a crush on. Only liked me as a friend. He dug her out plenty of times over the next year an I had to hear all about it.

.... damn this some funny stuff

 

[NoMayo15]

Consumed by school work and I had my best on. Always been a faithful dude regardless.

...that's some lame shyt man. Damn.

 

[MikeBrownsJob]

Nyggas losing vagina to Mango Habanero sauce

 

[bogey_j]

at only ONE coli female contributing a swagless story in 9 pages

 

[HalfwayHandsome]

so i've been dating this girl for a few weeks. she is by far one of the hottest girls i've ever dated. definitely top 3 of all time. like, i know how fortunate i am to be dating her right now.

anyways, she knows that i want to fukk her. like so bad. and she's been fukking with my head about it though. i haven't hit it yet, but gotten so damn close. like making out and under the clothes touching, but every time we almost get to doing it, she stops and keeps withholding from me. i think she gets off on my torture, but i'm cool with it.

then the other night happened. we went on a date and went back to her place afterward. in her ultimate move to fukk with me, she said "let me put on a show for you"; and started stripping. and got naked, she then got on her bed, and took out her dildo. it was fukking huge and black. anyways, she started fukking herself with it in front of me. it was so awesome. it was like those online videos, but in real person. i can't describe how sexy it was. needless to say, i had a raging boner and couldn't take it anymore.

i told her that she needed the real deal and went over to her on the bed. she then stopped me and said "i'll play with your toy.... if you play with my toy"; i was like, WTF? then she simultaneously put her lips on my dikk and put the dildo to my lips. "suck it"; she said. "i'll suck yours";. oh my god. it was weird. like, i was just so horny, and wanted her to suck my d1ck so bad, that i just went with it. then she started moving that sh1t in and out of my mouth, like, really mouth fukking me with a black dildo while she sucked my d1ck. i had a brief moment of "this shyts gay"; but i didnt want her to stop giving me head. before i knew it, i couldn't help it, and i came. with a dildo in my mouth.

does that make me gay?

Yes. U had a dikk in your mouth.

 

[iamstr8fire]

...that's some lame shyt man. Damn.

 

[DeuceZ]

nikka did you get any p*ssy in college?

I redeemed myself after the last Act...I had enough of passing up easy targets

 

[BossIAm]

I was in NYC and saw this hot older broad smoking a cigarette outside of her work place. Walked up and asked if I could get a cigarette and started coughing....yeah I don't smoke. No cigarette, no phone number....oh well, still no cancer.