Its the mindset and what you do to build yourself as a person. Reinvent yourself and improve yourself. As long as there is progress, positive things do happen.
Like you go to the 10th year High school reunion, and you did a total 180 on your appearance, way of thinking (confidence is a part of it), your words out your mouth, what you accomplished etc. and you see a particular set of broads that weren't feeling you, suddenly go

at your change, you have a shot cause you broke the pattern of predictability.
Key is, reinvent yourself constantly and never be predictable. Even the most jaded person will question you at some point. Just don't back down, give vague answers, and remain a mystery. People are attracted to a mystery that is entertaining and that has ambition. Never let your past or societal labels predict your future.