So fellas, the ladies wondering why ya'll aren't settling down for them. -Essence Mag

Lucky_Lefty

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How about they realize that marriage isn't for everyone :manny:

Me personally, I don't see the point of marriage (not saying that I'm against it, though) at my current position in life.
basically.....I'm dealing with a broad now who simply can't get this through her head. Even tho this was the VERY FIRST THING I told her when we met and she was ok with it
 

At30wecashout

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most men have your mindset, that's why women say there aren't any good men.
:ufdup:NO! Not most. Its false. However, economic changes, female empowerment, and cultural shifts have lead to the point we are at.

And the life expectancy keeps going up so there is really no rush. I believed in marraige, then reality and a few evil chicks set in.

I'm in no rush now:yeshrug:Im gonna have my fun, I have no biological clock, and if someone comes, they come. Not my fault. I didn't ask for things to work this way.
 

Ashley Banks

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:ufdup:NO! Not most. Its false. However, economic changes, female empowerment, and cultural shifts have lead to the point we are at.

And the life expectancy keeps going up so there is really no rush. I believed in marraige, then reality and a few evil chicks set in.

I'm in no rush now:yeshrug:Im gonna have my fun, I have no biological clock, and if someone comes, they come. Not my fault. I didn't ask for things to work this way.

Yes, most. those sayings don't just come out of thin air, it's from experience.
 

KENNY DA COOKER

HARD ON HOES is not a word it's a LIFESTYLE
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These are the women that spent their lives FUKKING THE DUDES they wanted to fukk (goon...baller..broke pretty n!gaga)....instead of the DUDES THEY SHOULD HAVE FUKKED (college educated...professional...morally upright..intellect)

Now they in their 30s ....not as hot looking as before...dealing with debt and bitter CAUSE THEY MADE BAD CHOICES..

And wonder why WE AINT TRYING TO WIFE THEM UP....

 

At30wecashout

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Yes, most. those sayings don't just come out of thin air, it's from experience.
Naaaaaaaaaaaaah. Notice there are people, male and female, complaining about not finding suitable partners. We have moved further away from marrying
for stability...cause everyone is expected to earn...and moved closer into a society full of distractions. Dating isn't immune from distractions, especially if a breh
who wasn't seeing much play is now making good money, has his shyt together, and has access to women he never did before his grind. Why settle down with
the first woman to tickle his fancy? Or the second? Or third?

I look at it like the women who have overlooked me throughout my lifetime. I might have been a "good guy" but I wasn't their guy, even if our friendship outlasted most of her relationships.
I have never been in a real relationship. I've got soul-searching to do, and it would take an extra special woman for me to decide to "stay put" if I can realistically travel, trick off money
on trinkets, invest in business and my future, all without having to potentially get down on bended knee for a woman I am not sure will be the right choice. Either way, I don't feel bad
for those ladies, especially if they look down on dudes who aren't in professional fields. Yes it also extends to working class women, but :yeshrug:

Dating isn't easy for anyone. I just know that I've been the good, patient guy for so long that it's boring. Time to live, and hopefully the other guys who are running through checks
can show me how to properly do it:banderas:
 

xXOGLEGENDXx

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Everybody always tries to make this discussion more complicated than it really is.

If you are a woman and you are not married yet it is because you are just not wife material. Simple.

Great wife material women don't just get passed up on. That's like saying there is a basketball player in the league that is 10x better than Michael Jordan ever was, but teams just keep passing on him for absolutely no logical reason. It doesn't happen. So all these delusional women keep blaming men for this when they refuse to look at themselves. Being classy and educated doesn't automatically equate to a good woman. My older cousin, shes a top lawyer at her firm she's educated obviously, doesn't go out too much. Isn't showing ass and isn't all over the gram, but she isn't homely at all. Can't cook well and would rather hire somebody to clean. She's just not a "Hold the fort down" kind of woman. And she wonders why a man hasn't proposed yet.

Men are expected in society to be the breadwinners and be highly educated and all that other stuff. We need somebody to fill our gaps not bring the same thing we already have.
If we have built a house and a woman comes by and says "Well look at me I built a house on my own" and another woman comes buy and says "I love your house I have all this furniture." Guess who is getting the ring?
 

Ashley Banks

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Naaaaaaaaaaaaah. Notice there are people, male and female, complaining about not finding suitable partners. We have moved further away from marrying
for stability...cause everyone is expected to earn...and moved closer into a society full of distractions. Dating isn't immune from distractions, especially if a breh
who wasn't seeing much play is now making good money, has his shyt together, and has access to women he never did before his grind. Why settle down with
the first woman to tickle his fancy? Or the second? Or third?


I look at it like the women who have overlooked me throughout my lifetime. I might have been a "good guy" but I wasn't their guy, even if our friendship outlasted most of her relationships.
I have never been in a real relationship. I've got soul-searching to do, and it would take an extra special woman for me to decide to "stay put" if I can realistically travel, trick off money
on trinkets, invest in business and my future, all without having to potentially get down on bended knee for a woman I am not sure will be the right choice. Either way, I don't feel bad
for those ladies, especially if they look down on dudes who aren't in professional fields. Yes it also extends to working class women, but :yeshrug:

Dating isn't easy for anyone. I just know that I've been the good, patient guy for so long that it's boring. Time to live, and hopefully the other guys who are running through checks
can show me how to properly do it:banderas:

that first, second, and third woman are the women saying there aren't any good men because they're constantly meeting men with your mindset because most men have your mindset.
 

hatechall

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I'm wondering as well....they look beautiful from the pics, I would venture to say,maybe they need to stop "wondering"....Its good brothers probably right under their nose...that they're not "Settling" for..........:jbhmm::mjpls:

Those are stock photos. But if you watch the matchmaking video...

Those women are mostly fat but expecting nikkas with super model looks. African American women are the only women who think having a degree entitles them to an attractive man.
 

KravenMorehead™

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ESSENCE.COM: Do you feel Black women and men are too particular when it comes to potential dating candidates?
FISHER:
We found that as opposed to the White clients that we’ve had, Black women are usually looking for physical attributes first. We look for someone who is attractive to us and then we pick up on his hobbies, interests and values. Whereas, White clients are looking for the reverse first. What kind of job does he have? Is he going to be able to provide?Then they circle back.

GILMORE: We’re the first ones to look at men's bodies and how attractive they are whereas our White clients have a long list of requirements of things like character and integrity...

FISHER: ...and, then down the line, it backfires for us because you were never a compatible mix to start with.

ESSENCE.COM: Do Black women have realistic dating pool expectations?
GILMORE:
We have clients that have a long laundry list of requirements—6 foot 4, with a Ph.D., never been married, no children, in his late 30s or early 40s—and a lot of times we then ask them, well, what are you bringing to the table? And, the answer is nowhere near all that. Why would you expect someone to have more than what you’re offering?
Alotta women like this, enough to warrant discussion.

...but stating it in a media publication and especially in this manner sets a destructive precedent. Are these bytches agents?
 

At30wecashout

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that first, second, and third woman are the women saying there aren't any good men because they're constantly meeting men with your mindset because most men have your mindset.
:jbhmm:If you say so. But me knowing that marraige is a lifelong commitment, Im going to be careful about hopping into that, especially since I didn't live much in my broke 20s.

And by lifelong, I meant monetarily if im worth something and the marraige ends. Marraiges end every day. I'm not going to lie and sell dreams (Unless I drop a mixtape:jawalrus:)

and I will just say straight up...I wanna continue to shoot in the gym:dame:I'll marry up when i've seen and lived more interesting things. The women should do that too:yeshrug:

Equality of choice:ohlawd:
 

At30wecashout

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And then when you want to swim in different pools of men who have a different mind set they start screaming black love with one side of their mouth and bedwench with the other.

Black women just need to keep it moving.
:ufdup:Thats the Coli speaking. Not real life. Most people aren't bothered by IR relationships. If thats the solution, im not mad. Black professionals are a small pool anyway, so get in where
you fit in.

That plumber or small business owner might be trying to make that black love happen to, however he might be beneath ya girl as the article also stated. Just like they didn't need to date me when I was

a broke college boy, I don't need to commit to them when im an impactful, goal-minded man.
 
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