The things I've seen, heard, and smelled. the former Life of an installer...

[Lucy]

Also, the one who mention about Section 8 ain't lying.

I know it might sound very unPC but, I haven't heard a person yet say that their community got better with Section 8.

shyt, I'm living in Section 8 and some of these ones in my community got me scratching my head trying to figure out why are they so intent on destroying the place that they live in. :|

 

[thesandman]

Women try to get you involved in seedy shyt to blackmail a discount out of you.

Mostly to get us to do side work and shyt like that.

 

[thesandman]

I'm telling you... You have no idea how open people will be... here's a snippet to a story...

I swear on everything a chick answers the door like this...


"I'm sorry it took too long....i just took a shower... My mom just died i have skin cancer...."


Wtf!?!?!? And so began the absolute worst experience in my life...

I never finished this story!? aaaw man...

 

[brickfare]

i'm a landlord but i only rent to people
with good credit scores.....
my homie got like 5 peices of property
but got in bed with section 8.

and man the shyt i've seen fukkin with
him on his bullshyt........collecting rent and repairs.

partner of mine was killed (set on fire) after having to evict some section 8 folks...

hope it works out for your homie tho

 

[Cat piss martini]

partner of mine was killed (set on fire) after having to evict some section 8 folks...

hope it works out for your homie tho

damn......sorry to hear that man.

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

Good thread

 

[Klyk21]

So I've seen some crazy shyt during my times in folks homes. I would be one of many guys that would install networks, computers, servers, home theater, and other consumer electronics.

I'll start from the beginning...

My first day, my first job. I was nervous AF but excited. My partner...a vet in the game gave me The dos and donts off top. Which was essentially follow his lead and use common sense... Respect their homes, etc.

The first client was an older Chinese chick who was open about everything... Including her failed marriage.

I'm showing her the in and outs of her new stuff including a new computer and she goes... in extremely broken English. "Where i fine the...uuh... The X!?"





Que Que??

She asks again but even hyper..."the X!?..."

UM...



"the X, X!?"




This woman was asking me how to find porn!!!?

Oh hell naw I'm not finna get fired on my first day

I just kept hitting her with the

But she just kept on..

I was like... miss... Just use Google...To search for whatever you're looking for but i can't help you...


Shorty dead ass hit me with the... "I'm looking for the good shyt, with the big ones!"



She was trying to get her life i guess...

My partner for some reason leaves the room...wtf!!!? Was this a test!?!?!?!

Nugga leaves me with this horny old ass heffer who starts to just go in on her husband who wasn't home at the time btw...

"The only reason why he marry, cause he want green card..."


Uuuh ok.


* Feeling awkward af... She staring at me...*


Me: Dang miss that's unfortunate..


... What a sucka


She just continues to blurt just straight slander on my man like

"He can't do me anymore because he has the diabete..."

"Can't keep it up..."


I can't front i was holding back laughter at this point... She's walking around the room just taking trash about replacing dude. Her dildo... Seriously i was dumbfounded. She somehow try to slide me her personal number talking about she'd give me a discount on some liquor since she owned a store...sheeeeit...

After the job was done my partner who was silently observing the whole time looks at me and bursts out in a big ol drunk uncle at a family reunion type laugh...

I'm dying too but the message was clear... Welcome to the world of install...

More stories of foul fukkery to come!!!

I'm looking for this type of job now. Thanks for sharing

 

[Amerikan Melanin]

Did you fukk any p*ssy at all on that job?

 

[thesandman]

Did you fukk any p*ssy at all on that job?

no I'll share some stories today about a close call tho... It's kinda funny

 

[thesandman]

This particular job i mentioned before.. Briefly...i never ever in my life wanted to be anywhere else more in my life. It's the only job that i was 5 seconds from walking out from. This chick was bat shyt crazy.


She lived in a very rich neighborhood by the water and you needed to be buzzed in. We pull up and park... She damn near leaps from her door. Her face is rough as fukk. Teeth looking like she sucks on rocks. But her body was actually decent. Nipples were hard too... From the start she was crazy af. "Hey I'm sorry i took so long i was in the shower,i have cancer..."

My partner and i were left speechless... Literally... We said nothing. Dirty blonde white chick, average height, and she's a tan away from looking like a tomato. She invited us in and i tried to go straight into the job..."So what are we taking care of today?"

She immediately starts telling her life story instead...She rambles about her mom dying recently from cancer and immediately starts crying. I tried to comfort her a little but wanted bring the attention back to why we were there. I'm not your fukking shrink lady i thought.. She directed us to her bedroom to hook up some AV shyt... But on the way up She starts rambling about us hooking up a phone/intercom system... Then jumps to us hooking up a home theater... Then says we need to check out her computer... all the while she was pacing frantically... Whoa lady one thing at a time... so while I'm hooking something up in the bedroom she keeps talking my ear off about how some cats in Florida are trying to rip her off for millions and that she hasn't left the house in 5 years...i try to ask her for a movie to test her DVD/VCR combo player and she screams wait!!!


Scared the shyt out of me. She runs top speed out of the room, down the stairs and out of ear range... Then right back just as fast. I was waiting to hear her trip and fall. She hands me a VHS tape and she smiles and says " play this please, this was before the cancer" i pop it in and i see her younger self at a party in a conga line.. Jesus Christ... She was a 10 y'all. I'm not playing at all. Crazy fat ass, big ol bubble. Breasts nice and perky, pretty smile and her face was so fresh.... Lol....i couldn't help myself i asked. "Wow when was this?" She said..."7 years ago " IMPOSSIBLE in the video she looked at least 15 years younger if not more!!! Man the meth or whatever she was on destroyed her... fukking nuclear hulk Hogan leg drop on her mind body and soul. *shivers* i know she said she had cancer but she also said that the doctors taking care of her mom banned her from the hospital..by now my partner and I were tired of her psychotic rambling and just cut her off mid sentence to get the fukk out of there. "Miss we really got to get going, everything is hooked up ready to go for you..." I start giving her my card and going into my spiel about calling me if she has issues..."Hey one more thing..." My partner and i look at each other. Time stops. I was about to have a nikka moment. My partner saw what was about to happen. This nikka read my mind or something. He uttered the words that saved my job...


"Yo, chill"


Thank you based partner...



I went into another room and it was a simple issue with her Comcast remote.I asked for the remote and she goes..."u can take whatever u want..." I reprogrammed it, and showed her everything was good and i had every intention of leaving. She reached down by a dresser and pulled out a small safe... She puts in the code fast as shyt and pulls out...






Mad pill bottles... Then money...



She goes to hand me some money... Nope nope nope...

Last thing i need is this junkie broad to say me and my man stole from her or something.


"No thank you ma'am, as long as your happy that's good enough for me..." I said with my best let me get the fukk out of here smile


"tAke ThE MoooOnEy..."


She whined...



Ugh Wtf



"It's ok miss, no worries"


"TAKE THE MONEY!"

she's crying now


"TAKE the money!"


She finally gave up and gave mea hug... Ugh...


We left and mainly stayed eerily silent... My partner was a vet and simply said.. I've never seen no shyt like that in my life....





But I'd fukk tho...hahaha my nikka a savage till the end.


Apparently she had other installers go there over the next few months and they had similar experiences and they all said the same thing... Craziest customer of all time. Oh i almost forgot...i felt sorry for her cat. The entire living room smelled of cat piss and sorrow. The cat looked like a POW... nikka gave me a thousand yard stare..


She is legend.

 

[Field Marshall Bradley]

i'm a landlord but i only rent to people
with good credit scores.....
my homie got like 5 peices of property
but got in bed with section 8.

and man the shyt i've seen fukkin with
him on his bullshyt........collecting rent and repairs.

This... fukk that section 8 shyt... learned the hard way.... I got 3 properties now that I rent to 7.5 mexican families.... no worries whatsoever...

 

[Jean Jacket]

This... fukk that section 8 shyt... learned the hard way.... I got 3 properties now that I rent to 7.5 mexican families.... no worries whatsoever...

I rent to my people. Greatest feeling ever. Win/win.

 

[thesandman]

This... fukk that section 8 shyt... learned the hard way.... I got 3 properties now that I rent to 7.5 mexican families.... no worries whatsoever...

7.5 tho?

 

[Field Marshall Bradley]

7.5 tho?

They try to hide it out of respect sometimes.... but I know what it is.... they take care of all minor repairs..... and I discount two of the renter's rent for keeping my yard and my mama's yard proper.....

Even with 7 people in a 3 bedroom, they respect the property(s) a lot better than the 4 member family I was renting to that was on section 8.... I got a 2 bedroom I'm renting and I know they got 5 folks staying there, but only 2 are kids.... they do good with the property as well

 

[thesandman]

1. All day gig that had the whole team doing a bunch of shyt in this mini mansion. It was an Indian family that were laid back. There was this kid that kept running around though asking us questions. He started getting in the way... Little dude got a little too curious though. Picked up a screw driver and was about to put it in the outlet!!!! We stopped him and this little nikka tried to fake like he was sleep when his mom's tried to yell at him. Hilarious at how smooth lil man played it.


2. I was talking to a client and suddenly I heard his stomach bubble. This ain't the first time I heard this type of bad guts this nikka stomach sounded like the intro to Ghetto D.



Mid sentence he just walked off. Didn't excuse himself or nothing. Crazy part he came back in literally 45 seconds. I know this nikka ain't wash his hands either. I tried to avoid shaking his hand as well. Failed.

3. Edit I did tell this one before

4. This disabled dude wanted me to hook up a PS4 to a old CRT TV. I actually started to entertain it but came to my senses quickly. I told him that you shouldn't even bother with converters. Just time to upgrade to HD or 4K to get the best experience. Suddenly his neighbor just walks in his crib like bruh man and was drunk AF. the disabled dude didn't really mind at first but the drunk neighbor started fukking with his dog that up until this point was chilling... The dog nipped at the drunk dude... While the drunk dude reached down to deal with the dog... The disabled dude reached up from his wheelchair and slapped this man in the face!? Bruh! The precision, the patience required... Was staggering. Jesus Mary and Joseph!! How did he know when to strike!? The drunk dude was hurt emotionally and apologized and looked at me. I looked away so fast biting my lip trying not to laugh. It was super unprofessional of me but... What could I do!? Charge it to the game.