Why are men avoiding marriage?

[Koba St]

I wonder if he got her from overseas

mail order?

Probably taught he was marrying some meek Asian sex slave who would fukk and clean all day.

 

[BigBoy713]

Imagine your work firing you after a decade and you have to pay them every month while they hire someone else to fill your role

 

[panopticon]

This is a very fair statement. However...

The Coli: Women don't want to build with men. That's why we are not married.
Also The Coli: I'm not married b/c I'm broke.

Women:

You bring up a good point.

I think what drives this vicious cycle is the concept of "anchored expectations."

Take a breh who grew up in an intact, middle-class family in a major metropolitan area. His parents were married in their mid-late 20s, and were able to purchase their first home around the same time - age 30 (maybe 35) at the latest.

From an early age that breh has learned by osmosis that marriage and the ability to purchase a home are intertwined - almost as though one can't happen without the other.

His expectations have been set (anchored) - marriage won't cross his mind as a realistic goal until he's achieved the sort of financial stability that would enable him to purchase a home.

Same thing goes for the woman he might have married - if she grew up in a similar environment, her own expectations are anchored in the same way. She won't consider a man for marriage until he's achieved the financial stability necessary to purchase a home (or is on a path that leads to that stability in the very near future).

Now add to this dynamic the fact that real estate prices in the vast majority of major metropolitan areas are through the roof. Meaning that what these two people's parents were able to purchase early in their marriages (detached, single-family homes) probably isn't available to them. Instead, by combining their incomes, they might be able to afford a small condo.

Remember, their expectations have been anchored because of their upbringings - a small condo isn't a detached, single-family home. Not being able to afford that single-family home, they don't consider themselves "qualified" for marriage.

Rinse and repeat those same anchored expectations across the board - everything from the ability to afford a new car to how often they vacation.

Millenials and late Gen-Xers are the first generation in America to experience a broadly lower standard of living than that of their parents. This shyt is unprecedented and is having all sorts of effects - everything from the invention of the "sharing economy" to the trend of more people in their 20s and 30s living with their parents than ever before...to lower marriage rates.

 

[Nymbus]

Work hard for a good life and lose half of it, plus your dog brehs.

 

[skeetsinternal]

Think about the fact you need a license to get married. A fukking license... Like fishing, hunting and driving.

 

[southern.girl]

what are the 'better' terms

who is being empowered and HOW are they empowered?

We no longer have to marry b/c we got knocked up. We can choose to marry later in life to ensure that we are making a commitment to a compatible partner & not just the first real relationship. We can learn from the mistakes of prior generations. We are not shackled to old ideas of marriage but we can create the partnerships that we want within marriage. I just have a positive view of marriage.

The truth is MOST men(even the smart and/or educated ones) will not be rich and most will be 1 or 2 paychecks from broke(even the self employed).

One of the greatest inventors in America died old and broke.So if your happiness and choice in partner revolves around the system of commerce based on a rigged monopoly game....good luck.

I never said that my happiness or partner choice had anything to do with commerce. I'm saying that men are using opposing excuses to not get married and I'm asking what excuse is the true factor. And then later on, you claim that I desire divorce, which I don't. I don't even understand where all of your wrong assumptions are coming from.

i don't think this is true. this is just a diss towards black men. the vast majority of divorces that i know of include some type of alimony

Statistically every race out earns us and has more wealth. I'm saying that as long as men are working an honest living, money should not be a huge factor in not getting married b/c on a holistic level, we did not have much money compared to the rest of the population in America. I clearly stated ways that black women can do better as well so why do you take one critique as a jab against black men?

Yea it's documented. Lol @ labeling the women I fukk as loose. I bring the freak out a bytch or any chic I'm with. Every woman is loose. I done had first ladies of churches to doctors and bytches that think they shyt don't stink.

I'm not jaded, I'm validated and informed about bytches these days. Y'all come in costumes and with p*ssy shared with the neighborhood. Y'all talk about giving boyfriends husband privileges like y'all pussies ain't been sampled like samples given out at Costco or Sam's Club. The married nikka is the cleanup man. In many cases the p*ssy, mouth and anus have already been shared with the community..there is nothing left for a married breh except residuals of the last nikka(s) . Name something else y'all bring to the table? Don't say shared bank accounts, property or kids because those are all anchors attached to a breh's pockets.

Every women is not busting it wide open for every man. That is YOUR experience. And yes, if any person is cheating on their spouse, they are being loose.

THERE'S NO NEED TO RESPOND TO ME ANYMORE. If you want to be single until you die, fine.

 

[LiveFromLondon]

Slavery was also once the foundation of a functional society. shyt changes over time.

No how can slavery be when it destroyed families of the enslaved, Try stick to the confines of the OP breh also if you look at black society now is that change good, espcially when you brehs be in threads shytting on single mums but be GMB

 

[Trapperman Dave]

Because marriage and love suck ass

 

[Xyrax]

Happily married to a black woman Ive known since 11 years old. We went to Uni together and got together 2 years before we graduated. Became true homeowners (made a lot of money off of the crypto boom) by paying off our house in 2017, mid thirties and we are now considering having at least one child. My girl is educated and makes more than I do

We happy. All I can say is you nikkas need to reach higher. The problems you nikkas describing are the same issues friends of mine are going through. nikkas need to stop spending their lives building something positive, then marrying DOWN. You marry up or across, period. bytches figured this out centuries ago and nikkas is still slow to catch up.... Worried about a bytch taking your shyt because you marrying bytches that dont have shyt of their own.


Let a pretty face on insta trick you into marrying a bytch with a $200 net worth, lose everything in a divorce because the bytch is annoying and stupid, then go dry dikked for the rest of your life screaming MGTOW on some quasi-gay/incel shyt brehs.

 

[Phitz]

We no longer have to marry b/c we got knocked up. We can choose to marry later in life to ensure that we are making a commitment to a compatible partner & not just the first real relationship. We can learn from the mistakes of prior generations. We are not shackled to old ideas of marriage but we can create the partnerships that we want within marriage. I just have a positive view of marriage.



I never said that my happiness or partner choice had anything to do with commerce. I'm saying that men are using opposing excuses to not get married and I'm asking what excuse is the true factor. And then later on, you claim that I desire divorce, which I don't. I don't even understand where all of your wrong assumptions are coming from.



.

We as in men and women, or just women?

With ALOT of people, marrying later in life causes complications with procreation

 

[Phitz]

Happily married to a black woman Ive known since 11 years old. We went to Uni together and got together 2 years before we graduated. Became true homeowners (made a lot of money off of the crypto boom) by paying off our house in 2017, mid thirties and we are now considering having at least one child. My girl is educated and makes more than I do

We happy. All I can say is you nikkas need to reach higher. The problems you nikkas describing are the same issues friends of mine are going through. nikkas need to stop spending their lived building something positive, then marrying DOWN. You marry up or across, period. bytches figured this out centuries ago and nikkas is still slow to catch up.... Worried about a bytch taking your shyt because you marrying bytches that dont have shyt of their own.


Let a pretty face on insta trick you into marrying a bytch with a $200 net worth, lose everything in a divorce because the bytch is annoying and stupid, then go dry dikked for the rest of your life screaming MGTOW on some quasi-gay/incel shyt brehs.

I'm in a healthy relationship, but I don't discount the next man's experience and/or use it to talk down to them. Always be considerate of the other story even though it's not your current experience or never was.

 

[skeetsinternal]

THERE'S NO NEED TO RESPOND TO ME ANYMORE. If you want to be single until you die, fine.

Come on ma, we just having a discussion. It's not about being single its about finding a real woman who you can build with outside of the established social norms of marriage.

 

[Wiles]

Marriage is the foundation to any functional society, this has been the case for millenia and goes beyond the ideals of feminists, Gmb and HOH agenda. Considering the ills facing western blacks, marriage is even more important than ever but I will let conventional Coli wisdom tell it GMB GMB GMB

You are in idiot


By your logic slavery has been around for centuries why is it illegal now? So u saying we can just keep doing something because its been around and benefits the few if none

 

[MidniteJay]

I'm fine without a legacy.

I just want to make my life as easy as possible.

 

[WesCrook]

It's unfortunate that many people don't know of a lot of happy marriages. I would dig deeper if I were you. I have a strange feeling that some of these old school (unhappy) marriages were shot gun weddings and that is the reason for such bitterness. In 2018 and beyond, we can marry on much better terms and that's empowering to me.

That's exactly the case. Older folks like to rag on the newer and recent generations, but they were just as reckless themselves. Raw Dogging @ 17,18 years old...girls end up preggo in their Junior year. Girl's pops is heated and like: "You're gonna marry my daughter and you're gonna join the service."