Black Engineer advice to young men: Don't date seriously until you're 30

[Cynic]

Well that’s why I said be strategic and not emphasize on love. Finding a woman on point financially is golden. She may not be the most attractive OR you get a female willing to learn. Either way you sacrifice something. Being married just for the sake of seems stupid.

I'm #GMB so my credit and standards are staying intact

 

[kevm3]

if you find that quality girl, you better get her and get out the game. It gets harder to find quality as you get older.

 

[Cynic]

It's not the fact that what you stated COULD AND DOES happen.
It's the fact that it has absolutely NOTHING to do with what she's talking about and you came outta left field with it.

Geesh.

So one income dropping off due to pregnancy has nothing to do with a two-income strategy to reduce debt ?


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if you find that quality girl, you better get her and get out the game. It gets harder to find quality as you get older.

 

[BrokePhiBroke]

So one income dropping off due to pregnancy has nothing to do with a two-income strategy to reduce debt ?

Pretend like you were making a logical point about one partner staying at home due to life changing events and not playing gender games...

Have a goodnight sir.

You are full of it.

 

[Ronnie Lott]

if you find that quality girl, you better get her and get out the game. It gets harder to find quality as you get older.

This. Some cats really think that once they get 30-35 that there will be an abundance of females out there with no kids/baggage.

 

[BrokePhiBroke]

This. Some cats really think that once they get 30-35 that there will be an abundance of females out there with no kids/baggage.

Their aim is younger chicks.

 

[Cynic]

Pretend like you were making a logical point about one partner staying at home due to life changing events and not playing gender games...

Have a goodnight sir.

You are full of it.

Those "life changing events" have serious financial consequences...

No gender games here...

 

[<<TheStandard>>]

if you find that quality girl, you better get her and get out the game. It gets harder to find quality as you get older.

I came in here to say this.

The dating pool in your 30s isn't what it is in your 20s. Once you get settled into your career you're probably not going out to clubs, lounges and bars every night either.

After a while so many women just have babies, baggage or both.

 

[Elle Driver]

Not all relationships end in marriage but are still of value. That said, I agree that monogamous dating should be with the end goal of marriage even if you don't get there.

And when you say "a" guy you must mean a guy with "xyz" as surely there have been guys who would put a ringer on your finger.



Depends. If its early in the relationship and you are still evaluating then I think its fine. If you lock that person in for 3, 4, 5 years and still giving them false hope then yeah that is terrible.

Poitier, tbh a lot of women scared to be alone. So they'll stick around for 10 years and a nikka will appease them by giving them an engagement ring with no intention of marriage. It's bad juju.

 

[Poitier]

Poitier, tbh a lot of women scared to be alone. So they'll stick around for 10 years and a nikka will appease them by giving them an engagement ring with no intention of marriage. It's bad juju.

Yeah, its hard out here for both men and women who actually want marriage.

 

[chowism]

I say this a man in a happy relationship and got in early. Don't settle down unless you absolutely want too. Honestly there is no benefit for a man to marry at all so do at your own risk. This is coming from a breh who has a good lady. It is best to wait until your 30's if you want to be serious. All you single brehs who don't have a wife and kids, don't rush into marriage or a relationship. Live your life and enjoy your money because once you get a lady and kids your life is finished.

 

[kevm3]

I came in here to say this.

The dating pool in your 30s isn't what it is in your 20s. Once you get settled into your career you're probably not going out to clubs, lounges and bars every night either.

After a while so many women just have babies, baggage or both.

Yeah man, cats got to realize that high quality women get wifed early more times than not. Passing those women up and wilding around until you are in your 30s is a questionable endeavor. If you keep up with yourself in your 30s, yes, you will have access to a a lot of women, but really, most women your age who are unmarried have too much going on, whether its a lot of kids, drama with exs or general craziness. More and more of your friends are going to be married during this age and having kids, so that cuts out on a lot of the 'rolling with the boys' time. The younger women, yea, you might be able to get at them, but the generational gap is going to be there, so it might be a bit harder to relate to them, especially the longer you wait.

I really feel sorry for a lot of the younger generation because they won't get that experience of growing in life with a woman... having that one woman from way back that you just experienced your life with.

Now I'm not saying to rush into marriage. Never force something that's not there. That's how you get caught up in a bad situation. What I am saying though is if you find that jewel of a woman, leave the game alone and don't look back. Wilding out with these party women won't give you anything but headaches and problems in the long-run.

 

[kevm3]

This. Some cats really think that once they get 30-35 that there will be an abundance of females out there with no kids/baggage.

I'm glad there's still a few of us out here telling these young cats the truth.

 

[Ashley Banks]

Shouldn't the fact you got married young dispel your own narrative, though?


Are yall going to pretend its the mans fault for folks getting married later and later when women are just as commitment phobic these days and steadily trying to upgrade to a better and better option thinking they can cash out on top?

And of course someone could lie....thats why you keep them on a timeline. Yall want to beg a nikka for a ring for 5 years and shyt

yes, I did get married young but how does that dispel anything?

I know more men with problems with commitment than women. Way more. A lot of it comes from them being told to avoid commitment and to play games.

 

[Cynic]

Yeah man, cats got to realize that high quality women get wifed early more times than not. Passing those women up and wilding around until you are in your 30s is a questionable endeavor. If you keep up with yourself in your 30s, yes, you will have access to a a lot of women, but really, most women your age who are unmarried have too much going on, whether its a lot of kids, drama with exs or general craziness. More and more of your friends are going to be married during this age and having kids, so that cuts out on a lot of the 'rolling with the boys' time. The younger women, yea, you might be able to get at them, but the generational gap is going to be there, so it might be a bit harder to relate to them, especially the longer you wait.

I really feel sorry for a lot of the younger generation because they won't get that experience of growing in life with a woman... having that one woman from way back that you just experienced your life with.

Now I'm not saying to rush into marriage. Never force something that's not there. That's how you get caught up in a bad situation. What I am saying though is if you find that jewel of a woman, leave the game alone and don't look back. Wilding out with these party women won't give you anything but headaches and problems in the long-run.

There is a lot of fear in this post dressed as advice. Fear of losing out on friendships
like you'd have time with them when they are married with kids ha! . Fear of not being able
to relate to younger women as if men can relate to women their own age. Do you really
watch and consume womens content like that ?

Are there any orphans here ? The one woman from waaaaaaaay back who experienced your life is your mother.


Women aren't some finite resource... the same women in your 20s will be replenished in your 30s
except you'll have more leverage and resources to select the best...

Rather than getting tied down and being bogged down with a gazillion responsbilities
and sacrificing your freedom, creativity during the years when you still have energy.

I say this a man in a happy relationship and got in early. Don't settle down unless you absolutely want too. Honestly there is no benefit for a man to marry at all so do at your own risk. This is coming from a breh who has a good lady. It is best to wait until your 30's if you want to be serious. All you single brehs who don't have a wife and kids, don't rush into marriage or a relationship. Live your life and enjoy your money because once you get a lady and kids your life is finished.

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