Is It Worth It To Still Try To Date/Find Love After 40?

International Playa

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Everyone's journey is different, don't compare with people

My uncle he married his first wife at 32, had 2 kids, they divorced when he turned 38, wife stopped having sex with him & were sleeping in separate bedrooms. He remarried a 2nd wife, a young woman (23 year old) when he was 45, they had 2 kids too. Now he is 65 & just retired, he getting a divorce from 2nd wife, she just stopped wanting to be intimate too.

One thing I learnt from him always stack your bread, he is retiring as a single divorced man, with 3-4 rental properties, investments. He also stayed jogging & looked after his health.

I was with a woman from 32 till 35, we lived together, I thought she was "The one". Relationship ended & now im 36 back on the dating market, I'm dating a woman but I don't think we are compatible enough, but we will see.

Don't rush, marry & have kids with the wrong woman. Don't let societal pressure get to you.
 
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Ohene

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Everyone journey is different, don't compare with people

My uncle he married his first wife at 32, had 2 kids, they divorced when he turned 38, wofe stopped having sex with him & were sleeping in separate bedrooms. He remarried a 2nd wife, a young woman (23 year old) when he was 45, they had 2 kids too. Now he is 65 & just retired, he getting a divorce from 2nd wife, she just stopped wanting to be intimate too.

One thing I learnt from him always stack your bread, he is retiring as a single divorced man, with 3-4 rental properties, investments. He also stayed jogging & looked after his health.

I was with a woman from 32 till 35, we lived together, I thought she was "The one". Relationship ended & now im 36 back on the dating market, I'm dating a woman but I don't think we are compatible enough, but we will see.
Why these chicks keep losing their sex drive with him?

What advice he be giving you looking back on failed marriages
 

International Playa

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Why these chicks keep losing their sex drive with him?

What advice he be giving you looking back on failed marriages
I don't know why they kept losing sex drive with him, both women had finished having kids & were 38+ when they lost their sex drive.

He just said don't rush in to marriage & kids, only do it when YOU are ready & sure about the woman you want to marry. Also always stack your money & invest. He was a teacher but with his investments he is retiring a very wealthy man. He makes more money retired than when he was working.
 
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WIA20XX

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lol i feel like you need to share with us stories of your former escapades breh

Strictly X-Files! That said, if you really want to eat in Colombia, Mexico, DR, or SEA or the "3rd" world - you have to speak the language. It's worth 3 months in some language school in Cartagena to become fluent, if that means you have access to 100's of millions of women.

So when Patrice was talking about the pros in Rio, I understood what he meant by how feminine chicks outside of America are, and how that brings out something in you that just makes you want to protect and provide.

And it's not just a developing country thing, going to Italy, FR, Japan - they just have different idea of what being a woman means, and what being a man means. Now keep in mind, Mario, Jean Reno, and Ryu all complain about their women, but dollar for dollar....

Keep in feminine behavior is GAME - behavior that affects male emotions and pushes him to certain behaviors - it's how she gets what she wants - it's just deep rooted game, and game enforced by their culture and society. It's not surface level, it's deep.

When American chicks that were previously mannish/masculine/"alpha" try to switch up to Soft Girl, we see the fakery in it...
 

Ohene

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Strictly X-Files! That said, if you really want to eat in Colombia, Mexico, DR, or SEA or the "3rd" world - you have to speak the language. It's worth 3 months in some language school in Cartagena to become fluent, if that means you have access to 100's of millions of women.

So when Patrice was talking about the pros in Rio, I understood what he meant by how feminine chicks outside of America are, and how that brings out something in you that just makes you want to protect and provide.

And it's not just a developing country thing, going to Italy, FR, Japan - they just have different idea of what being a woman means, and what being a man means. Now keep in mind, Mario, Jean Reno, and Ryu all complain about their women, but dollar for dollar....

Keep in feminine behavior is GAME - behavior that affects male emotions and pushes him to certain behaviors - it's how she gets what she wants - it's just deep rooted game, and game enforced by their culture and society. It's not surface level, it's deep.

When American chicks that were previously mannish/masculine/"alpha" try to switch up to Soft Girl, we see the fakery in it...
I agree with the feminine rhetoric
Was trying to show my ex girl this but she was too far gone, argumentative and egotistical to get it

Now that i broke up with her she will probably fix up for the next dude
 

WIA20XX

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I don't know why they kept losing sex drive with him, both women had finished having kids & were 38+ when they lost their sex drive.

It's pretty typical (read wife/mommy boards), even if the dude keeps his game tight.

The way the American system works, she can put the screws to her husband for whatever reason.

As Chris Rock said, "I gotta go sleep on my mama's couch cause you not in love?"
 

Michael's Black Son

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I'm 37 turning 38 next month

Past two months I've been out on dates with women as young as 25 and as old as 38

the ball is in your court as a man

Since covid the oldest I’ve dealt with is 30.

The brehs flat out failing are a combo of looking like toxic Avenger, washed, insanely socially inept, baby momma/kid drama, not knowing their lane or not stepping their shyt up to meet their expectations.

I know dudes and females who talk about how rough the dating scene is and I’m like “how” but knowing these people I can see how. We are in this era of so many intentionally “damage” people who constantly are tripping over their delusions and not doing even a fraction of the work to improve

Fùck it. Imma eat until I can’t.

I wish these folks a hundred years of success, but it’s my time :heh:
 

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Hell no. Im almost 39 myself. You can go where u want,do what you want as a single man with no kids. No matter how fine she is you will be giving up everything for her. Think about a relationship. You wanna watch basketball,chill,drink,smash etc she wants to go to ballet or some boring ass event. As a man we shouldnt be looking for anything but our happiness and joy. Im not saying women dont have their purpose or place :whoa:. 30+ especially 35+ women are looking for a retirement plan. Making it to 40 with no kids is a blessing.Not many of us truely get to the mountaintop to say. Alot of wisdom and smart decisions to not impregnate these harlots out here.Alot of wisdom to not even marry them. At 40 its whatever happens happens. At end of day if you wanna trade in your 1 seat sportscar aka single occupant vehicle for a minivan thats your choice :pachaha:
 

Ohene

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Hell no. Im almost 39 myself. You can go where u want,do what you want as a single man with no kids. No matter how fine she is you will be giving up everything for her. Think about a relationship. You wanna watch basketball,chill,drink,smash etc she wants to go to ballet or some boring ass event. As a man we shouldnt be looking for anything but our happiness and joy. Im not saying women dont have their purpose or place :whoa:. 30+ especially 35+ women are looking for a retirement plan. Making it to 40 with no kids is a blessing.Not many of us truely get to the mountaintop to say. Alot of wisdom and smart decisions to not impregnate these harlots out here.Alot of wisdom to not even marry them. At 40 its whatever happens happens. At end of day if you wanna trade in your 1 seat sportscar aka single occupant vehicle for a minivan thats your choice :pachaha:
lol the username to post correlation
 

Primetime

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The TL DR - if you're in shape, teeth look good, no gut, dress well enough, got your paper right, got a spot, got a car, baby mama and kids are well handled - you'll eat.

You can eat off of dating apps, if you're going "age appropriate".
You can grab these young chicks if you go to the right social events.

Generally, my observations.

On the female side, they always bring problems
18-22 - No R. Kelly, but these chicks are exhausting to even be around
23-26 - The idea age for a chick to get married, but you gotta compete with dudes that are 28-33.
27-31 - some of these chicks been ran through, been divorced, might have YOUNG children, prolly deep in the career - might be looking for a life raft, but still looking for fun. A lot of the ones without issues have eaten themselves out of the race.
32-35 - smart ones - PANIC MODE, FIND A HUSBAND and the dumb ones "comfortably" single*
36+ - Lord, Jesus, send me a man. *no longer comfortably single
45+ - She still look good? Kids grown. Married, been there done that. But if she got money, you betta have more money. If she don't have money, you're a life saver. This is not even gold digger mentality, at 45+ you need to have made something of your life. Trucker, Mechanic, Banker, something. You not out here still trying DJ, Produce, be a party promoter, etc. If you clubbing heavy, it's cause you're an owner.

I agree with this age breakdown. I'm 37 and an expat breh overseas in the middle east, i've spent too many weekends in Dubai the ast few years acting a fool in my 30s with females from all over that live or vacation there (croatian, serbian, ethopian, morrocan, brahraini, saudi, egyptian, russian, brazilian, azerbaijan, italian, brits, you name it) age ranging from 22 to 38. Too many beautiful women in Dubai.

Fortunately i'm tall, fit, dress correct, and black don't crack so i look more 29 than 37, so i've never had issues getting attention from any age bracket, whether overseas or in the states. It ultimately depends on what exactly you want as a man. If you actually want kids/a family, then that 23-26 is your ideal bracket or the 27-31 if you're ok with her being somewhat ran through and/or looking at you as a life raft.

Tho at the same time, those chicks in that ideal bracket may have to feel ok with you being a retired playboy or whatever red flags they may associate with you being (near) 40, dating a younger chick. If you've already gone through the gauntlet of marriage/kids/divorce, etc then it's probably less stressful, as you may just stick with females closer to your age who have already gone through the gauntlet themselves and are simply just looking for companionship.
 

MikelArteta

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Every ex I've ever had.

WIA, I started cooking....

SMH.
64e9674eec756b815f5f7aef60fc1b37d83442382d1ddb024fa24c6825d0f772._RI_V_TTW_.jpg



for a while this was me, every ex got married or knocked up by the next dude they dated after me :heh:
 

MikelArteta

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I agree with this age breakdown. I'm 37 and an expat breh overseas in the middle east, i've spent too many weekends in Dubai the ast few years acting a fool in my 30s with females from all over that live or vacation there (croatian, serbian, ethopian, morrocan, brahraini, saudi, egyptian, russian, brazilian, azerbaijan, italian, brits, you name it) age ranging from 22 to 38. Too many beautiful women in Dubai.

Fortunately i'm tall, fit, dress correct, and black don't crack so i look more 29 than 37, so i've never had issues getting attention from any age bracket, whether overseas or in the states. It ultimately depends on what exactly you want as a man. If you actually want kids/a family, then that 23-26 is your ideal bracket or the 27-31 if you're ok with her being somewhat ran through and/or looking at you as a life raft.

Tho at the same time, those chicks in that ideal bracket may have to feel ok with you being a retired playboy or whatever red flags they may associate with you being (near) 40, dating a younger chick. If you've already gone through the gauntlet of marriage/kids/divorce, etc then it's probably less stressful, as you may just stick with females closer to your age who have already gone through the gauntlet themselves and are simply just looking for companionship.

The TL DR - if you're in shape, teeth look good, no gut, dress well enough, got your paper right, got a spot, got a car, baby mama and kids are well handled - you'll eat.

You can eat off of dating apps, if you're going "age appropriate".
You can grab these young chicks if you go to the right social events.

Generally, my observations.

On the female side, they always bring problems
18-22 - No R. Kelly, but these chicks are exhausting to even be around
23-26 - The idea age for a chick to get married, but you gotta compete with dudes that are 28-33.
27-31 - some of these chicks been ran through, been divorced, might have YOUNG children, prolly deep in the career - might be looking for a life raft, but still looking for fun. A lot of the ones without issues have eaten themselves out of the race.
32-35 - smart ones - PANIC MODE, FIND A HUSBAND and the dumb ones "comfortably" single*
36+ - Lord, Jesus, send me a man. *no longer comfortably single
45+ - She still look good? Kids grown. Married, been there done that. But if she got money, you betta have more money. If she don't have money, you're a life saver. This is not even gold digger mentality, at 45+ you need to have made something of your life. Trucker, Mechanic, Banker, something. You not out here still trying DJ, Produce, be a party promoter, etc. If you clubbing heavy, it's cause you're an owner.

She don't look good? She heavy in the church and non-profit fields, "auntie so and so" that paying out the pocket for other sister/cousin/mama/grandmama mistakes.

On the male side
- 18-32 - ideally bang everything in site; but in for most actuality prolly not. Does not really pick up until 25+. HS and College when you're in your best shape, the females (that you want, you know the ones, not cosplay chicks, the ones that watch Naruto religiously) is hollering at Thugs, Rappers, Drug Dealers, etc.
- 33-35 - I been there done, that, got my money right, finally...lemme get married, get my little league coaching game up.
- 36+ - Never been married and not gonna get married - i.e. player for life. Or Been married, now divorced, I have cordial relationship with ex and kids.
- Gen X (my demographic) - If it happens, it happens. But damn if I'm not set in my ways.

These mutant cyborg bodies you young dudes like, y'all can have Blacc Chyna n'nem (or you dudes and BBWs...).

And it don't help that women in my proper demographic (mid 30's to early 40's) are trying to still be City Girlz.

This is Black Excellence for me and mines

whatever-happened-to-bern-nadette-stanis-thelma-from-good-times.jpg



That said, a lot of cats 30+ are starting to look abroad.

It starts out as out right tricking (Patrice O'Neal in Brazil for instance) or low grade tricking (pay for the date, she pay you back in bed) or Arbitrage (They love us in Europe and Japan) - but travel enough and realize that not everything is sweet in America. Goes beyond the women....

its true :heh:, the one date I went on with a woman over 36 she was 38 and right away she was talking about marriage. How she was focused on her career in her twenties and 30s but now wants to be married and have a kid and this was on our first date she was telling me all this.

Never talked to her again
 
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