Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[African_brehda]

Finally decided to let this girl go.

Early on in our relationship, she caught me texting the other girl I was also talking to before I made stuff official with her.

She had a terrible breakdown at my crib over that, i apologized about it and cut all communications with this person. Apparently this incident triggered her anxiety and made her paranoid, and we’ve had numerous fights over this over the past month. Constantly checking my phone, constantly trying to keep tabs on me.

She decided to end things on Tuesday night, over the phone, and I didn’t fight it, I didn’t have the energy to. I didn’t even try reaching out to her the whole of Wednesday.. I received a long ass text on Wednesday night about how much I didn’t care and how much I have treated her as a replaceable option. I tried replying and noticed I was blocked. I guess it’s really over now.

I understand it’s my fault, but why forgive me and decide to continue with me if you’re going to constantly bring up what I did?

 

[The ADD]

Finally decided to let this girl go.

Early on in our relationship, she caught me texting the other girl I was also talking to before I made stuff official with her.

She had a terrible breakdown at my crib over that, i apologized about it and cut all communications with this person. Apparently this incident triggered her anxiety and made her paranoid, and we’ve had numerous fights over this over the past month. Constantly checking my phone, constantly trying to keep tabs on me.

She decided to end things on Tuesday night, over the phone, and I didn’t fight it, I didn’t have the energy to. I didn’t even try reaching out to her the whole of Wednesday.. I received a long ass text on Wednesday night about how much I didn’t care and how much I have treated her as a replaceable option. I tried replying and noticed I was blocked. I guess it’s really over now.

I understand it’s my fault, but why forgive me and decide to continue with me if you’re going to constantly bring up what I did?

How is that your fault?

 

[jay83]

I met a girl on a first date who admitted she’s was on a group chat called “are we dating the same guy?”. Kept it moving after that. lol

 

[DJSmooth]

Finally decided to let this girl go.

Early on in our relationship, she caught me texting the other girl I was also talking to before I made stuff official with her.

She had a terrible breakdown at my crib over that, i apologized about it and cut all communications with this person. Apparently this incident triggered her anxiety and made her paranoid, and we’ve had numerous fights over this over the past month. Constantly checking my phone, constantly trying to keep tabs on me.

She decided to end things on Tuesday night, over the phone, and I didn’t fight it, I didn’t have the energy to. I didn’t even try reaching out to her the whole of Wednesday.. I received a long ass text on Wednesday night about how much I didn’t care and how much I have treated her as a replaceable option. I tried replying and noticed I was blocked. I guess it’s really over now.

I understand it’s my fault, but why forgive me and decide to continue with me if you’re going to constantly bring up what I did?

Like she not texting other nikkas herself

She'll eventually reach back out if you ignore her long enough and don't chase her. "WhY DiDnT YoU FiGHt FoR Me...?"

If you take her back it's completely up to you. If you going to let her keep gaslighting you I wouldn't recommend it.

 

[Sleepy Floyd]

All these women really are the same at the end of the day. It's like they were all given the same script to read from. Just enjoy your turn.

 

[African_brehda]

How is that your fault?

Finding those messages on my phone was kind of the genesis of our issues. So I accept responsibility for that.

But choosing to forgive, deciding to move forward with the relationship and then constantly bringing it up, constantly accusing me of shyt was some bullshyt from her.

Should’ve known what time it was when her therapist told her I was one of the main triggers of her anxiety.

 

[The ADD]

Finding those messages on my phone was kind of the genesis of our issues. So I accept responsibility for that.

But choosing to forgive, deciding to move forward with the relationship and then constantly bringing it up, constantly accusing me of shyt was some bullshyt from her.

Should’ve known what time it was when her therapist told her I was one of the main triggers of her anxiety.

I don’t understand. You said yall weren’t together officially.

 

[African_brehda]

I don’t understand. You said yall weren’t together officially.

We were together officially. But early on in the relationship ,I was still texting the other girl I was talking to, and she saw those messages..

 

[The ADD]

We were together officially. But early on in the relationship ,I was still texting the other girl I was talking to, and she saw those messages..

Gotcha

OP said the opposite so I was confused

 

[re'up]

it's fascinating how people communicate, I am sure people used to hide behind letters or phone calls or whatever too, but what kind of system is this we have been conditioned into - where you block people, and unblock them based on hour to hour feelings? Or, as dude described, write a long ass emotional text, that needs a response and then blocking them, effectively but artificially giving you the last word.

and I hear similar stories all the time from men and women.

Started to notice about 7 years ago, that I would have a moment with someone, and then they would wait until I was physically gone to text me what they should have said in person. It was usually positive, but I noticed it way back then, like why didn't you just tell me face to face?

 

[Scaaar]

it's fascinating how people communicate, I am sure people used to hide behind letters or phone calls or whatever too, but what kind of system is this, we have been conditioned into - where you block people, and unblock them based on hour to hour feelings? Or, as dude described, write a long ass emotional text, that needs a response and then blocking them, effectively but artificially giving you the last word.

and I hear similar stories all the time from men and women.

Started to notice about 7 years ago, that I would have a moment with someone, and then they would wait until I was physically gone to text me what they should have said in person. It was usually positive, but I noticed it way back then, like why didn't you just tell me face to face?

People are trying to dictate the outcome of situations as well as win internal battles in their heads. That's why you see a lot of chics play the block game. If they got the last word in that means they won. But that's pure ego talking and arguing to win instead of coming to an understanding. The other issue is that people don't know who they truly are so they can't be their actual self in person especially if they're presenting a persona on the socials.

 

[re'up]

People are trying to dictate the outcome of situations as well as win internal battles in their heads. That's why you see a lot of chics play the block game. If they got the last word in that means they won. But that's pure ego talking and arguing to win instead of coming to an understanding. The other issue is that people don't know who they truly are so they can't be their actual self in person especially if they're presenting a persona on the socials.

All good insight. That relates to a quote I read about the rigidity of presenting an image on social media, and how that impacts your interactions. You get less tolerant, less open.

I can't quite grasp the point, but there's something there about this medium of communication: the blocking, the texting, ghosting, written responses, and the inability to form connections. How can you feel connected to anyone or anything, if everyone is one block away from nonexistence? At least temporarily. And this leads to the kind of clinginess through messaging that is omnipresent, you have to keep the texts going, or it's gone forever. But isn't that really flimsy to begin with?

My thing is we can always have a conversation. You may not like the answers, but we can always have it. The last time I had to end a relationship, I structured it so we could talk for like 3.5 hours in person. It wasn't easy, but it was healing. I could see her visibily wanting to just stop talking, because she couldn't be with her emotions.

 

[Scaaar]

All good insight. That relates to a quote I read about the rigidity of presenting an image on social media, and how that impacts your interactions. You get less tolerant, less open.

I can't quite grasp the point, but there's something there about this medium of communication: the blocking, the texting, ghosting, written responses, and the inability to form connections. How can you feel connected to anyone or anything, if everyone is one block away from nonexistence? At least temporarily. And this leads to the kind of clinginess through messaging that is omnipresent, you have to keep the texts going, or it's gone forever. But isn't that really flimsy to begin with?

My thing is we can always have a conversation. You may not like the answers, but we can always have it. The last time I had to end a relationship, I structured it so we could talk for like 3.5 hours in person. It wasn't easy, but it was healing. I could see her visibily wanting to just stop talking, because she couldn't be with her emotions.

That's one of the bigger underlying issues. We live in a society in which everyone is stuck in their own self echo chamber of self love and constant reassurance. Having tough convos remove that insulation and forces people into uncomfortable situations that they avoided for most of their lives. That's why they prefer written convos then the in person one. It gives them time to try to draft a perfect response instead of actually being themselves and responding to understand.

 

[Jasonmask]

They have apps that bypasses blocked numbers give it a try if you’re in the mood to throw some Hail Marys

 

[The ADD]

They have apps that bypasses blocked numbers give it a try if you’re in the mood to throw some Hail Marys