1.1 'TRUE' LOVE
Imagine a film script containing the following scene:
Sun, sea, a deserted beach, a man, and a woman.
The man Darling, you're so quiet. Anything wrong?
The woman It's nothing.
He Come on, tell me, what is it?
She I don't know how to make you understand.
He How to make me understand what?
She (After a pause) I want to leave you.
He Another man?
She Yes.
He Are you sure you love him?
She Yes.
He More than you love me?
She I can't go on without him.
He (Puts his arm around her) How wonderful.
She What did you say?
He I said, that's wonderful. Go ahead — with him.
She You're glad?
He Why shouldn't I be?
She Then you no longer love me?
He On the contrary.
She You still love me?
He I love you, so I want you to be happy. What did you expect?
At this point in the scenario, if not sooner, the producer reading it picks up his phone and dials the author.
'Are you out of your mind?' he asks. He had ordered a love scene, but this certainly was no imaginable love scene, was it? In a real love scene the man would at this point crack his wife's skull, or at least give a good imitation of doing it. Then, he would leap into his car, drive off with tires screeching, to beat up his rival.
But the author is not inclined to make any changes. If the man really loves his wife, he would behave as outlined in the script. True love is selfless by definition.
If the producer is willing to debate the matter, the discussion would presumably turn on their being two kinds of love: forgiving or vengeful, self-sacrificing or possessive, the love that gives or the love that takes...
Is it so? Are there really two kinds of love, opposite in nature, between a man and a woman? Or is only one of these the real thing, the other a fake?
How is it possible that an experience every adult must have had at least once in his life, a phenomenon thoroughly explored by generations of psychoanalysts, the favorite age-old theme of writers, composers, artists, can still be the subject of so much misunderstanding?
What is love?