Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[Lieutenant Daniels]

It's interesting, about two weeks after my break up I was good. It was weird but not bad.

It's been almost two months and I get waves of sadness because little things remind me of her. Almost four years together. Overall it's for the best but I guess I feel guilty for some of my complaints and making her feel inadequate at times.

Interesting enough the relationship didn't have toxicity. She was conflict avoidant which eventually ended up in two arguments where she threw stuff and attacked me in the last one which ended the relationship.


I'm healing and focusing on myself though. Being social, reading a lot, bought me a new fragrance and some artwork for my place.

Man I haven’t seen or spoken to my ex since May. My break up is documented in this thread. In the totality of it her and I have been broken up since last November and I STILL have have my days where all I’m doing is thinking about her.

I’ve been with several girls since then and even dealing with a cool one right now.

I say that to say that it’s gonna take awhile. Especially when you’ve been with her for years. That’s a lot of connection to break. Just gotta let it go and let your brain process it. Ultimately I don’t think you ever “get over it”. You just one day stop reminiscing and thinking about what could’ve been.

 

[Lieutenant Daniels]

i don’t know about this…. The women I mess with reflect my energy or maybe we just have similar energy to begin with. Either way, occasionally they will type back to a text immediately if we’re planning on meeting that day, but I don’t expect them too normally do that because I don’t either.

Ain’t shyt to talk about that is urgent enough to need immediate response.

Like I’m her lover not her friend. Meanwhile my female friends respond quicker because we have things in common that we find interesting to talk about.

I always say this but having legitimate female friends makes having a chick easier because you see the difference interaction and you realize being too friendly isn’t the point. Talking to much isn’t the point.

That’s been my experience as well. Most women these days aren’t going to extend any real effort in pursuing you unless they feeling you THAT much. Usually if I fall back they fall back. Only time that’s not the case in my experience is if I’ve hooked them enough mentally and have already hit. Otherwise, I can’t tell you how many women I’ve met and it went nowhere in the talking/meeting stage (and this was all face to face no online dating).

I refuse to be a sucka so if she don’t text me, guess what, I don’t text her (in the beginning)

 

[The ADD]

If you bushed the relationship why be sad about it?

 

[Tr0yTV]

Idk what’s wrong with hinge but all the women I’m coming across lately look better than usual. I’m talking rose option type women.

 

[Straw Hat Luffy]

Met a girl on Hinge, and we talked every day for a month and a half before hanging out. We talked about our intentions, I told her mine first stating that I'm looking for nothing serious since I just moved to the area (aka friends with benefits). She said she would like to have a relationship but at the moment she's down for whatever because of the previous horrible experiences on Hinge. We also talk about how if we are going to hookup then we can't hookup with others.

Cool. I smash.

We continue to talk every day because we enjoy the convos. She brings up one of her sisters and some of her friends know about me now. She mentioned to me that in a few weeks they're throwing a party and that she wants me to come. I instantly turn it down.

I hang with her the day before the party and she brings it up again. I tell her no. She asks again and I tell her I don't have money to go out and spend like that. She says she will pay for the drinks and the uber rights. I tell her no again; she's getting whiny about it not taking the got damn hint.

I still smash that night anyways.

Day of the party she won't stop blowing up my phone telling me to come, that her sister's not taking no for an answer, etc. I ignore her all day because it's clear she's drunk.

The next day I address the situation by bringing up that we agreed to be fwb and meeting all those friends and her sister screams serious relationship vibes for me. I suggest that maybe we should end it.

She apologizes saying that she didn't think inviting me to something like that signaled it being serious. She also said we did agree on being Fwb but she also wants a long-term serious relationship one day. Which is not how it went with our agreement lol. We talked it out and I think we're still fwb but I stopped responding to her and haven't talked to her in a couple of days.

She's a nice girl so I'm not trying to dog her/do her bogus in any way. I'm trying to be clear about that as much as possible so I don't hurt her feelings. She's fun to hang out with and fun to talk to about anything but I've seen her family in photos and everything she's told me about them portrays them to be annoying AF. I've met her pets her cats and dog annoyed me LMAO. I don't know what it is man it's both aspects that are major CONS to me.

Sex was fire tho and I want to smash again because scouting and spitting game again to find another fwb seems like work.

Don't know what to do, she says we can remain fwb but I feel like she's going to pull something again later on if I continue to smash. Right?

 

[The ADD]

Met a girl on Hinge, and we talked every day for a month and a half before hanging out. We talked about our intentions, I told her mine first stating that I'm looking for nothing serious since I just moved to the area (aka friends with benefits). She said she would like to have a relationship but at the moment she's down for whatever because of the previous horrible experiences on Hinge. We also talk about how if we are going to hookup then we can't hookup with others.

Cool. I smash.

We continue to talk every day because we enjoy the convos. She brings up one of her sisters and some of her friends know about me now. She mentioned to me that in a few weeks they're throwing a party and that she wants me to come. I instantly turn it down.

I hang with her the day before the party and she brings it up again. I tell her no. She asks again and I tell her I don't have money to go out and spend like that. She says she will pay for the drinks and the uber rights. I tell her no again; she's getting whiny about it not taking the got damn hint.

I still smash that night anyways.

Day of the party she won't stop blowing up my phone telling me to come, that her sister's not taking no for an answer, etc. I ignore her all day because it's clear she's drunk.

The next day I address the situation by bringing up that we agreed to be fwb and meeting all those friends and her sister screams serious relationship vibes for me. I suggest that maybe we should end it.

She apologizes saying that she didn't think inviting me to something like that signaled it being serious. She also said we did agree on being Fwb but she also wants a long-term serious relationship one day. Which is not how it went with our agreement lol. We talked it out and I think we're still fwb but I stopped responding to her and haven't talked to her in a couple of days.

She's a nice girl so I'm not trying to dog her/do her bogus in any way. I'm trying to be clear about that as much as possible so I don't hurt her feelings. She's fun to hang out with and fun to talk to about anything but I've seen her family in photos and everything she's told me about them portrays them to be annoying AF. I've met her pets her cats and dog annoyed me LMAO. I don't know what it is man it's both aspects that are major CONS to me.

Sex was fire tho and I want to smash again because scouting and spitting game again to find another fwb seems like work.

Don't know what to do, she says we can remain fwb but I feel like she's going to pull something again later on if I continue to smash. Right?

Said you didn’t want anything serious then proceeded to talk every day and say she shouldn’t sleep with anyone else.

Oh the mixed signals

 

[Straw Hat Luffy]

Said you didn’t want anything serious then proceeded to talk every day and say she shouldn’t sleep with anyone else.

Oh the mixed signals

mixed signals how?

I talk to my friends every day lol. It just happens that we have benefits

And we both agreed on not sleeping with others because we don't want to catch anything.

I thought the agreement was safe, logical and fair.

 

[The ADD]

mixed signals how?

I talk to my friends every day lol. It just happens that we have benefits

And we both agreed on not sleeping with others because we don't want to catch anything.

I thought the agreement was safe, logical and fair.

Me thinks you don’t understand women

 

[Straw Hat Luffy]

Me thinks you don’t understand women

I guess not on your level

elaborate 6 cert breh

 

[Wargames]

Met a girl on Hinge, and we talked every day for a month and a half before hanging out. We talked about our intentions, I told her mine first stating that I'm looking for nothing serious since I just moved to the area (aka friends with benefits). She said she would like to have a relationship but at the moment she's down for whatever because of the previous horrible experiences on Hinge. We also talk about how if we are going to hookup then we can't hookup with others.

Cool. I smash.

We continue to talk every day because we enjoy the convos. She brings up one of her sisters and some of her friends know about me now. She mentioned to me that in a few weeks they're throwing a party and that she wants me to come. I instantly turn it down.

I hang with her the day before the party and she brings it up again. I tell her no. She asks again and I tell her I don't have money to go out and spend like that. She says she will pay for the drinks and the uber rights. I tell her no again; she's getting whiny about it not taking the got damn hint.

I still smash that night anyways.

Day of the party she won't stop blowing up my phone telling me to come, that her sister's not taking no for an answer, etc. I ignore her all day because it's clear she's drunk.

The next day I address the situation by bringing up that we agreed to be fwb and meeting all those friends and her sister screams serious relationship vibes for me. I suggest that maybe we should end it.

She apologizes saying that she didn't think inviting me to something like that signaled it being serious. She also said we did agree on being Fwb but she also wants a long-term serious relationship one day. Which is not how it went with our agreement lol. We talked it out and I think we're still fwb but I stopped responding to her and haven't talked to her in a couple of days.

She's a nice girl so I'm not trying to dog her/do her bogus in any way. I'm trying to be clear about that as much as possible so I don't hurt her feelings. She's fun to hang out with and fun to talk to about anything but I've seen her family in photos and everything she's told me about them portrays them to be annoying AF. I've met her pets her cats and dog annoyed me LMAO. I don't know what it is man it's both aspects that are major CONS to me.

Sex was fire tho and I want to smash again because scouting and spitting game again to find another fwb seems like work.

Don't know what to do, she says we can remain fwb but I feel like she's going to pull something again later on if I continue to smash. Right?

FWB isn’t actually “talk to you every day” friends it really just means enjoying each other company, and smashing. It doesn’t even include hanging out, outside of sex. It’s really Netflix and Chill or Sneaky links.

You said she didn’t take the hint, but honestly you didn’t take the hint you are in a pretty traditional relationship…. You’re just treating her bad. Talking to her every day, hanging out, and smashing… That is basically a early stage relationship. She told people about you like a relationship, and you ditch her on purpose.

Real talk not calling her too after hurting her feelings, but then you’re only conflict is you want to smash…. That’s some cold shyt, but if she allows it, you can play that. Just be honest about what it is with yourself even if it makes sense not to say it to her since it allows you to avoid intimacy outside of sex.

mixed signals how?

I talk to my friends every day lol. It just happens that we have benefits

And we both agreed on not sleeping with others because we don't want to catch anything.

I thought the agreement was safe, logical and fair.

Bro that is a Girlfriend….

 

[Straw Hat Luffy]

FWB isn’t actually “talk to you every day” friends it really just means enjoying each other company, and smashing. It doesn’t even include hanging out, outside of sex. It’s really Netflix and Chill or Sneaky links.

You said she didn’t take the hint, but honestly you didn’t take the hint you are in a pretty traditional relationship…. You’re just treating her bad. Talking to her every day, hanging out, and smashing… That is basically a early stage relationship. She told people about you like a relationship, and you ditch her on purpose.

Real talk not calling her too after hurting her feelings, but then you’re only conflict is you want to smash…. That’s some cold shyt, but if she allows it, you can play that. Just be honest about what it is with yourself even if it makes sense not to say it to her since it allows you to avoid intimacy outside of sex.


Bro that is a Girlfriend….

now that you phrase it that way

 

[The ADD]

Spend dedicated time with a woman and stipulate she not sleep with anyone else and be befuddled that she thinks there is more there brehs

 

[Wargames]

now that you phrase it that way

It’s all good with a name like Luffy your understanding of women matches. Like you can walk away. Your laid the ground work for that, but you can also stay. Though finding a woman cool and the People around her annoying is not uncommon. If you like her and her people that is a strong sign she could be wife material.

Anyhow you just avoid her when she is with them. Don’t tell her you’re doing that specifically because it will hurt her feelings and give her a conflict…

just be scarce or have something else to do except for things like birthday parties…

That and holidays is when you have to bite the bullet…

 

[Straw Hat Luffy]

It’s all good with a name like Luffy your understanding of women matches. Like you can walk away. Your laid the ground work for that, but you can also stay. Though finding a woman cool and the People around her annoying is not uncommon. If you like her and her people that is a strong sign she could be wife material.

Anyhow you just avoid her when she is with them. Don’t tell her you’re doing that specifically because it will hurt her feelings and give her a conflict…

just be scarce or have something else to do except for things like birthday parties…

That and holidays is when you have to bite the bullet…

I mean when you phrase the talking everyday part it makes sense.

But I don't see how we agreed to not smash others while we're currently hooking up signifies relationship status. It's safe if you ask me. She proposed the idea because she doesn't want to catch anything and I don't want to get check-ups at the clinic because she's smashing others. That part made hella sense to me.

But the other shyt could be seen as mixed signals I guess.

Didn't mean to make it that way lol. Like I said I just moved here to the big city and don't want to be in a relationship and I don't know anyone else around here so I would always socialize with her.

We're gonna have to make the terms clearer because I'm not planning on getting in one.

If not I'm just going to move on because now that I think about it she's probably waiting for me to cave in and ask her to make it official.

 

[Wargames]

I mean when you phrase the talking everyday part it makes sense.

But I don't see how we agreed to not smash others while we're currently hooking up signifies relationship status. It's safe if you ask me. She proposed the idea because she doesn't want to catch anything and I don't want to get check-ups at the clinic because she's smashing others. That part made hella sense to me.

But the other shyt could be seen as mixed signals I guess.

Didn't mean to make it that way lol. Like I said I just moved here to the big city and don't want to be in a relationship and I don't know anyone else around here so I would always socialize with her.

We're gonna have to make the terms clearer because I'm not planning on getting in one.

If not I'm just going to move on because now that I think about it she's probably waiting for me to cave in and ask her to make it official.

That’s fair. Don’t waste her time or break her heart. Make your intentions clear and fall back a little.

Also bro I hear you on the stds concerns but exclusivity is a sign of commitment. Even if it’s for health reasons. That is part of the mindset conservatives have regarding contraceptives and condoms. If they made people limit their sexual partners due to a lack of safe sex. Even just for health reasons, eventually the familiarity will lead to getting married (or kids). Then both people involved will pretend to be born again Christian’s just like the rest of Conservatives do.

Safe sex = more sexual partners