Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[The ADD]

Yeah I mentioned I wanted kids with one woman last month and I think that made her lose interest in me because it's something I want in my future.

Weeks later after we stopped talking I saw her on Bumble and her children section mentioned "Not Sure Yet". I just don't understand that in your mid 30s.

Given what I know about her ie being an only child, a bit of careerist, etc I will surmise that kids aren't a priority for her so I'd assume no hence the misalignment.

I had an ex that mentioned kids but she would also mention how life transforming kids are. Ultimately her actions didn't match her words.

Matching your values and wants are important in pursuing a long term relationship. I've learned sticking to your guns instead of settling and compromising is the best path

What don’t you understand about it?

 

[ViShawn]

What don’t you understand about it?

Mid 30s for women comes up to high risk pregnancy. I would think given women's timeframe more would figure this out before their biological clock is running out.

 

[The ADD]

Mid 30s for women comes up to high risk pregnancy. I would think given women's timeframe more would figure this out before their biological clock is running out.

I would imagine that is part of the uncertainty

 

[Apollo Creed]

Women are much more selfish and narcissistic than men these days.

the thing is in the past women yield benefits from men being selfish lol, we don't gain shyt from what women do today.

 

[bigde09]

One thing I've noticed recently talking to a bunch of broads is many of them have never even had a relationship before or just had one many years ago. And these are chicks in their late twenties, early thirties.

They have situationships. Allows them to keep their options open while still having all the benefits of a relationship.

 

[Ohene]

I agree

Women aren’t held to a high standard in society when it comes to love and dating. Due to the inherent thirst of men the average woman has no incentive to become “good”. Why improve when 90% of your suitors will accept you as you are. Until men as a collective begin to relax their thirst and hold woman accountable in mass they will continue to behave as such. Society ranks women as inherently delicate and good so a woman walks around believing in that.

I can’t fault them for that. Most men would do the same if the roles were reversed. All you can do is have YOUR personal standards. If a woman doesn’t meet your threshold then find one who will.

Me personally, I’ve been under operation “I want what I want no exceptions” mode. I don’t care if she fits what I want mentally, if her body is mid then bushes. If her body is nice but her mental is mid then bushes. More men need to start shyt canning these women for being mediocre

ehhh, i agree but disagree

you can say the bolded but the truth is that 90% of their suitors (being the people they actually want) dont accept who they are. the truth is instead that most are too delusional to be able to identify why men will date, spend bread on and fukk them but not commit to them. they will deflect blame, calling men fukkboys and acting as if they were misled. the truth is often that the man might have been open minded to commitment but the women didnt show him anything to make him want to do that.

men woo/seduce women on the front end but women are expected to do so on the backend to sustain a relationship. most women simply dont know this though. They view relationships as courtships rather than partnerships. fukk around and end up in situationships as a result.

even some of the women you see in long term relationships. it may seem as if they are "accepted" but tell me - if a woman's man is cheating on her or entertaining others is he really accepting her behavior or nah? I choose the latter

 

[Ohene]

Women that say “I want to open up / let go of control but I can’t”



You better go to therapy or figure it out before dealing with me.

Why the hell should I take responsibility if your energy isn’t right.

one thing i can say is that women are starting to read/listen to a lot of that manosphere/redpill shyt and the talking pts come out in conversation.
they also reading too many memes/celebrity tweets.

one example is this notion that in order for a man to lead, he has to make a girl feel safe / secure or else she wont be submissive/follow. It's a huge red flag and highlights a guilty until proven innocent mentality that tings have nowadays.

1. If you dont feel safe or secure then dont get into an exclusive relationship for somebody. Use the dating phase to understand their core values, personality traits and then be ready to jump in a relationship free and clear.

2. Once youre in that relationship, dont jump to conclusions based on rather inconsequential events/arguments. Short of abuse, cheating etc., a man's behavior should never be that damning to the point where it sparks insecurity and fear. But these girls want everything to be one way.

Feeling safe and secure should be the default unless you have a lot of baggage or traumatic experiences. So yea...that guilty until proven innocent shyt is a self-fulfilling prophecy waiting to happen. A lot of women are really obtuse nowadays when it comes to relationships and lack any self-awareness or understanding of human/male nature.

 

[ViShawn]

One thing I've noticed recently talking to a bunch of broads is many of them have never even had a relationship before or just had one many years ago. And these are chicks in their late twenties, early thirties.

This post made me recall meeting a woman in her mid 30s that told me she's never been in a relationship. Attractive woman but as someone mentioned it sounded like one of those women that got involved in a situationship or she was waiting for the man to commit and it never happened.

 

[RaspberryFitted]

last three pages have just been bashing my queeens!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Ohene]

its simple....

no matter what you do YOU will NEVER be able to give multiple women the attention they desire....its impossible...theres only one you and eventually you will fall off....

only way you can pull it off long term is if you have NOTHING else going on in life but juggling women....




and who wants to live like that?

job...hobbies...building a business....gym...you should be too busy for a roster....

that , and you have to be manipulative. at some point one or some will want exclusivity and you will have to string them along or lie

even when I had a gf I would bag and chat to women to keep a one-two as a back up but they would always wanna go out, do stuff , come over etc. So slowly they would fade to oblivion

 

[Ohene]

last three pages have just been bashing my queeens!!!!!!!!!!!

i think a lot of the men here are just being objective. It isn't bashing; it's simply depicting whats going on out here for the average single dude

the game is what it is. many of us still try to be optimistic, going out on dates, getting to know women etc. Unfortunately, we quickly find out why most of these women are single in the first place; it's usually the egoistic/entitled mentality and poor communication skills. That isnt to say we men may not also have flaws ourselves though.

 

[Lieutenant Daniels]

ehhh, i agree but disagree

you can say the bolded but the truth is that 90% of their suitors (being the people they actually want) dont accept who they are. the truth is instead that most are too delusional to be able to identify why men will date, spend bread on and fukk them but not commit to them. they will deflect blame, calling men fukkboys and acting as if they were misled. the truth is often that the man might have been open minded to commitment but the women didnt show him anything to make him want to do that.

men woo/seduce women on the front end but women are expected to do so on the backend to sustain a relationship. most women simply dont know this though. They view relationships as courtships rather than partnerships. fukk around and end up in situationships as a result.

even some of the women you see in long term relationships. it may seem as if they are "accepted" but tell me - if a woman's man is cheating on her or entertaining others is he really accepting her behavior or nah? I choose the latter

Good point. Haven’t considered this perspective. Thanks breh.

 

[RaspberryFitted]

yes....he is

a lot of men dont fit this category....ask just about any single woman and see what she says....

and the men that fit this category...know that they do....and have almost NO incentive to settle down

Just on the #'s

6 figures (10-15% of the population) and 6 foot tall (10-20%) - is like 2 in a 100.
Once you start going down the line with any other requirements (facial attractiveness, heterosexual, single, interested in a long term relationship, lives within 100 miles, Black), a chick needs to cultivating tens of thousands of social media followers to find any that meet the criteria.

Or she needs to put herself in places where those men are. That's why you see them turn out for NBA All Star Weekend, but ain't nobody trying to roll to the national NSBE conference...

AND unlike men - we going mostly off of face/body, they all seem to want the SAME dude, or the same set of dudes. So there's competition angle that they don't want to admit.

As things go, if a Black dude is school minded, average height, and stays in decent shape not D1 athlete shape - he should CLEAN up. Give these 19 year olds some basic game, and cat might have a harem by senior year.

It's been like this for sometime, and is only getting worse because of factors beyond anyone's control.

What's a black woman to do?

Not go to school? Plenty of them don't, and those aren't lives a lot of people want to live.
Not make money? Hell naw.

And if she has to choose between having a kid and not having a kid, a lot will choose to have kids with a dude they find sexy, but without the benefit of a husband.

It is what it is.

I didn’t take into account the age gap of me and the majority of posts (late 20s - late 50s)

for a grown man to have his own place & car (+10 if it’s luxurious), a stable and lucrative career, and the time mgmt to engage in his hobbies, fitness, nutrition, and responsibilities … yeah nah

I was viewing it from my perspective: college student still at his mamas crib with a semester left to graduate and internships under his belt. I virtually have all the time in the world to do literally whatever I want to improve myself, so to me those attributes ain’t sound extreme.

Reason why I usually keep quiet in this thread

 

[RaspberryFitted]

Unfortunately, we quickly find out why most of these women are single in the first place; it's usually the egoistic/entitled mentality and poor communication skills. That isnt to say we men may not also have flaws ourselves though.

Men have spent decades examining their flaws. So much so, they create flaws out of thin air for them to fix rather than assume the woman is on some bullshyt. So much so, other Men are like guard dogs checking each other to “stay in line”

It’s borderline whiny when brehs continue to speak on it w/o any actions, but they’re on point to say the shyt we seeing out here rn is glaring.

 

[Ahadi]

I didn’t take into account the age gap of me and the majority of posts (late 20s - late 50s)

for a grown man to have his own place & car (+10 if it’s luxurious), a stable and lucrative career, and the time mgmt to engage in his hobbies, fitness, nutrition, and responsibilities … yeah nah

I was viewing it from my perspective: college student still at his mamas crib with a semester left to graduate and internships under his belt. I virtually have all the time in the world to do literally whatever I want to improve myself, so to me those attributes ain’t sound extreme.

Reason why I usually keep quiet in this thread

The car depends on where you live.

I’m a transplant so a lot of the women I’ve dealt with (to my surprise) didn’t get mad or turned off when I said I didn’t have one. I usually receive a “good for you, I wish I didn’t have to pay this off” or “that makes sense”

But as for the age thing, I didn’t believe it when OGs would say “trust me when you get older, you’ll eat”

I was eating somewhat in college due to (photography/party promoting) but in my 29-30 age era today, it’s just coming together so easily and these are women ages 20-30+ (especially 30+) they see you like some kind of unicorn. A black man with his ish together.