Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[The ADD]

He said he likes cookies so I'm going to bake him some from scratch and attach a card.

 

[Rawtid]

Be nice to men, brehs.

 

[MikelArteta]

what's the word on being friends with an ex (mistake i know now, first one I tried this with), one with a kid, has a great job but is going through tough times

Don't do it, women only want to be friends to relieve their guilt, or your the nice guy former ex she can always count on while she messes with teh scum of the earth. Especially shes a single mom

-said ex eventually get's herself a bf, but continues to ask/rely on you for help/assistance on things like nothing has changed, not really conscious to anything you may have going on/lined up unless you tell her, but is understanding if you dont have time.

ah she has you by the balls you get nothing in return but continually you give and give and give

-keep in mind you were able to give so much time initially because you were not in anything official yourself, just the casual breezies, even doing a bid of friends with benefits with the said ex every once in a while , and of course the ex was single, otherwise you wouldn't be there that closely in the first place unless it was for fukkery

admit deep down if she was single and wanted you back you would jump at the chance, cut the cord breh cut it

-and you were cool with helping out early on because she is actually good person that helped you out in the past during yall relationship , plus her son is a good kid and reminds you of yourself at his age (so easy to get attached to kids ), and needs that male guidanceotherwise you wouldn't be there that closely in the first place unless it was for fukkery

let the father or her new bf give the kid good male guidance it aint your kid and your no longer with her

- during this time you get a tone/sense that maybe the ex is now finally seeing somebody official ( cool hopefully it' s a good dude, is nice to the kid and etc), just a gut feeling no confirmation, and from there you slowly tone your contributions down.

-once she finally notifies you of the new bf she has, you explain to the ex (in a calm manner) you are cutting off the financial aspect of assistance you were providing and that maybe her bf should take over that job since they are that serious

ive been in this situation, and you know what i said? not my concern. I had a ex i had under my name for a cellphone, she was paying it monthly we broke up she started dating someone new, she had bad credit and couldnt get a cell phone she begged and pleaded and i said NOT MY CONCERN, why should I continually do a favor when im getting nothing out of it?

- ex gets all over this and claims she cant tell her new bf about her financial situation because of embarrassment , and is still when you wont budge on your stance

they always get mad, no one told them to ring up their debts or had bad credit etc., let them realize that folks like you aren';t born on trees outside not every guy is nice and generous not wanting anything in return to bad the tide has turned now

- ex is still all calling you all types of hypocrites, having agendas, and etc, looking to make a friend feel guilty by using the word "friend" as a crutch (in my opinion)

thats what they do try to bring out all that crap, real friends dont use you and are only around when they need something, real friends treat you with respect and appreciate all he things you have done.

-ex also claims that the bf knows about you (keep in mind this is: staying overnight at her apt frequently to help out with the kid, prior relationship-both as bf&gf and recently friends with bennies, financial assistance, being a male role model/father figure to her soon to be 4 year old son, all for the past 3 years)
can someone explain to me what's going here? I can go into more detail if needed (kind of complicated), but what is so hard for a chick to understand about the different levels between a guy that is a friend (with prior history like an ex/no bad blood) and a guy that is now "thee" man in her relationship? Am I wrong for cutting my resources off? I mean her man should be that type of support in my opinion.

She has this boyfriend (i found proof that they love each other even) yet still to this day wants to contact a brotha first when she has emergencies like needing to go to the hospital and stuff like that.
Why would this brotha be the first contact on some seriousness like that . I understand friends help out in the time of need, but still some of this behavior is weird to me.

cut everything off and walk away from this toxic situation, breh i have been in your shoes wiht a ex trust me, this will go on for years or until the day you die if you let it. She won't be thinking damn NormanConnors is a great man I should go back to him or i really appreicate all normanconnors has done, nah in her mind your just a sucker ex she can use an she knows how to play with your emotions like a keyboard.

Im telling you cut the CORD tdoay righ tnow don't care about her situation about her kid, and get yourself some happiness.

Trust me I know deep down you would love for her to realize all the things you done, and her to want to give it another go etc. IT WONT HAPPEN. even if she breaks up with dude she will contiue hopping to dude to dude while you will sit there like damn i treated her and her kid good, i love her but your just that poor sucker there incase of a emergency.

GET OUT NOW THESE WOMEN ARE TOXIC AND WILL DESTROY YOUR LIFE TRUST ME

 

[The Frozen One]

Saw ex on tinder.

Deleted account.

 

[DaRealness]

Ole "you're boring" chick just messaged me again.

 

[kevm3]

I posted this in another thread, but just brought it here for reference:

my opinion is you got to set clear boundaries on what is and isn't acceptable for a woman in a relationship with you, but if she keeps on violating those rules, instead of trying to mold this woman into doing the right thing, let her get to where she wants to be, which is with them negroes in the club. It's kind of like you attending an Ivy League. They got clear rules on what is and isn't acceptable... if you constantly break those rules, they aren't going to baby you and try to make you into a decent student who is worthy to attend that university. They will expel you and open that spot up for another student who can follow the rules. a ho is going to be a ho, so don't put no ho in the role of a queen.

This was in reference to dealing with a woman who is 'your girl', but is constantly wanting to go to the club, on vacations without you, etc., A ho is going to be a ho, so if she doesn't qualify for what a worthy woman is, you got to give her the boot. You'll waste a whole lot of time trying to change her around and she'll end up sneaking off behind your back. You got to realize when she's one that already came out the oven. A woman with a ho mentality, don't waste time changing her. Let her get to where she wants to go and find a woman whose internal characteristics are more in line with what you're looking for... but as a man you HAVE to set clear boundaries on what is and isn't acceptable.

 

[Raiders]

He said he likes cookies so I'm going to bake him some from scratch and attach a card.

I think that would be the best option as long as you write something nice/personal/encouraging in the card.

Females have bought me nice things over the years, and those things are quickly forgotten, but the personal small things are remembered. With me at least.

 

[SubLyminalz]

i literally dont have no hoes right now

but at the end of the day i dont have to deal with any bullshyt, started back going to the gym monday and i feel great im content with not having any at the moment but these late lonely nights are getting rough with no cheeks

 

[RealAssanova]

This why I've always said that the best way to punish a broad is total indifference and withdrawing all your attention. Not putting your hands on her or engaging in any back and forth bullshyt arguments over nothing, just shut off like a light switch and be done with her altogether. They hate that shyt and can't handle that. I just KNEW I was gonna be hearing from that broad again, either directly or indirectly through my cousin. I ain't gonna lie though, a part of me felt on the inside, but I wasn't playing a game, I meant it when I told her she can delete me and go message another dude instead. fukk I look justifying myself to a bytch I don't even know?

Thankfully, I've developed and become a hell of a lot wiser and tougher - and I'm still growing. I still slip from time to time, but overall I've come a long way. Sometimes you have to go through pressure in order to become a diamond.

#HOH for 2014.

realest shyt i never wrote. There is this broad in my class that i had wit me all throughout my program. We was cool and all until about end of last semester. I unno if its her personality or whatnot, but i tried callin her couple times throughout the span of the semester cuz i hate texting and i preferred speaking over the phone as it answered the questions i had much quicker. Well, in the beginning, she would either pick up or call back quickly. Then i noticed her behaviour started to change and she began takin awhile to reply to my texts and shyt than normally. One time she apologized in class cuz she didn't call back or text me. I didn't really say anything so i guess she took it as a pass. Well, she began to notice i was starting to distance myself away from her so she pulled me back in with the dreadful i miss you BS. And i kinda fell for it brehs End of the semester, exams were nearing and i called her one afternoon to ask about something....no answer. No call back or text apologizing and asking wassup. So i finally said aii its like that?

She texts me during da week before exams asking if i finished our assignment...never responded, deleted the msg and her number.

She in all my classes this semester and i haven't said a word to her. No acknowledgement of her existence either. Funny enough, she texted me few days ago again asking if i finished the assignment due this past tuesday asked who this is..and when she told me it was her..i said nah and deleted the text, eventhough i did finish the assignment.

I don't give a fukk how long we may have no each other or been together...the minute you cross a line or i see you constantly doin it, indirectly/directly apologizing and then going back to doin it again...you out. Dead. Eradicated.

 

[kevm3]

realest shyt i never wrote. There is this broad in my class that i had wit me all throughout my program. We was cool and all until about end of last semester. I unno if its her personality or whatnot, but i tried callin her couple times throughout the span of the semester cuz i hate texting and i preferred speaking over the phone as it answered the questions i had much quicker. Well, in the beginning, she would either pick up or call back quickly. Then i noticed her behaviour started to change and she began takin awhile to reply to my texts and shyt than normally. One time she apologized in class cuz she didn't call back or text me. I didn't really say anything so i guess she took it as a pass. Well, she began to notice i was starting to distance myself away from her so she pulled me back in with the dreadful i miss you BS. And i kinda fell for it brehs End of the semester, exams were nearing and i called her one afternoon to ask about something....no answer. No call back or text apologizing and asking wassup. So i finally said aii its like that?

She texts me during da week before exams asking if i finished our assignment...never responded, deleted the msg and her number.

She in all my classes this semester and i haven't said a word to her. No acknowledgement of her existence either. Funny enough, she texted me few days ago again asking if i finished the assignment due this past tuesday asked who this is..and when she told me it was her..i said nah and deleted the text, eventhough i did finish the assignment.

I don't give a fukk how long we may have no each other or been together...the minute you cross a line or i see you constantly doin it, indirectly/directly apologizing and then going back to doin it again...you out. Dead. Eradicated.

Women love having fall-back dudes, aka dudes they can depend on for favor or attention when they aren't getting it from their main target. It's just like how norman was talking about babygirl was trying to get finances from him while she has a new boyfriend... ol girl with you is wanting to hit you up at her leisure and when she's bored, but will ignore you when you get at her... both of those are fallback negro territory and as soon as you notice you are there, it's time to cut all ties. Great thing you pumped the breaks on that. no self-respecting man is going to sit there and let someone hit them up at their leisure and do nothing but ask for favors and never reciprocate. The reason these women are so out of pocket is because we have too many accommodating men who hang around and provide benefits all the while getting disrespected.

 

[Ohene]

we're not on watch buying level at this time but I can dig the food. He said he likes peanut butter cookies so I'm going to make him some and send it with a note card. Thank you for the response.

very good idea

 

[kevm3]

Let's get on to this subject of leadership. As a man, obviously you have to be a leader. One of the keys of leadership is being consistent. If you're not living up to your role as a leader, don't be mad when your 'follower'/followers rebel against you if they even accept your leadership in the first place. The quickest way to lose trust, which is what makes someone willingly follow you in the first place is to either lie or to be a hypocrite. You can't expect a woman to live up to what a woman is supposed to be if you're not living up to what a man is supposed to be, because as a man, you are FIRST. You are the leader. She will follow your example. This is why honesty is so important. Don't get into a relationship if that's not what you want. The reason a lot of women have virtually zero trust in men and male leadership is because a lot of men are lying about what they want, she trusts him, and then he renegs on his word... or he may have a loyal woman but he's not rewarding her loyalty because he's cheating on her and dealing with all other kinds of women. Why should she be committed to you and really grind it out for you if you're rewarding women who are doing nothing for you? Are there women that love being around cheating type dudes? Absolutely, but those aren't the type of women you want to invite in your life... but as a man who is trying to build something with a woman, in order to have her trust you, you have to provide some incentive for her loyalty and your word has to MEAN something. If you tell her you're going to do something, you do it. When you continually do that, you build a reputation for being 'stand-up' and you get trust off of that. A lot of guys may get a woman who is willing to follow him, but he tells her to do stupid stuff and it blows up in her face. Why should she want to follow a man after that? As a man, you have to be serious about the validity of your word and you have to reward loyalty.

 

[Mr210]

any experiences with starting a relationship with someone you work with. I know people say never mix business and pleasure, but wondering if anyone has tried it and how did it go

 

[mamba]

any experiences with starting a relationship with someone you work with. I know people say never mix business and pleasure, but wondering if anyone has tried it and how did it go

In general, don't date people in your workplace. It's rarely a good idea.

It can work, in theory, if you work for a huge company (i.e., you all work in completely different divisions, buildings, etc.)

But, if your intra-company networks are common and you all work in the same vicinity, it's a bad idea.

There are tons of women outside your company. Date them.

 

[TheArchitect]

i literally dont have no hoes right now

but at the end of the day i dont have to deal with any bullshyt, started back going to the gym monday and i feel great im content with not having any at the moment but these late lonely nights are getting rough with no cheeks

I feel your pain my dude...As much as I resist,my libido is too strong I guess...