So Yall Really not gon get Married?
- Thread starter Bossyyyyy
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Do you have a child outside of wedlock?
No
Do you regularly date women with children outside of wedlock?
No
If not, why have you brought it up?
I don't know what you're referencing, add a quote so I can understand the context of what you're talking about.
What's men's problem with modern women?
This is a complex answer, but the most succinct summation I can give is their standards/expectations are largely unrealistic.
What do you want from a woman/partner?
This is a complex answer, but since it's personal/subjective to me I can give a quick summation. A black educated, woman who is willing to either split things evenly, or take on gender roles within the relationship. I'm not picky on looks (moreso personality), consider myself a 6.5, so a 5+ non obese black woman would suffice aesthetically. Sense of humor (not necessarily funny but willing to laugh), more traditional than modern, not into third wave feminism, and pro-black. There's more that escapes me at the moment but that's the basics
Are you able to date the women you would like to date?
Yes and no. I can, attract and keep them, but not when I'm truly being myself so not really, but if you can't be you then it defeats the purpose and the woman isn't truly for you. Moreover, the type of women I'd like to date are increasingly rare in my age group as well as my geographical region.
No need for insults. Unless my assumptions are true, I haven't insulted you.
There's no need for assumptions in the first place, just ask questions straight up, acquire knowledge then make evaluations from there. You can assume things mentally but once you allow your assumptions out of your mind and into the world you WILL be judged for how correct or incorrect you are. If I observe a woman's body and assume she's pregnant that's one thing, but if I say "When is the baby due?" and I am incorrect in my assumption, the L that follows would be my fault.
Name a few if these unrealistic expectations the modern woman has in 2021.. I want to compare it to the 90s..
Thanks for answering.
How old are you and what's your location?
What is it about your true self that is turning them away? Don't need to specify but is it a general thing relevant to men at large or a personal issue?
You are offended by men making assumptions on an internet forum so don't want to make anymore.
It's mostly aesthetics/superficial aspects driven by social media and the internet added with philosophical cognitive dissonance/hypocrisy. Women in my age group regardless of their own height and build only want, tall/fit men, with above average looks. They also want men to play traditional provider roles without doing the traditional housemaking/supporting feminine roles.
I could go on but to make it simple they want a man that's better than them but treats the woman as if she's an equal if not the proverbial prize
22, San Diego. I only have interest in dating/seriously entertaining black women. I am a thinker, intellectual type, I'm organized, and thrive off efficiency as well as logic. I don't have tolerance for ignorance, and have patience issues with stupidity, but if I see genuine effort I'm always willing to work with someone in a coworker/colleague/acquaintance sense. Unfortunately anti-intellectualism is rampant in America and is an issue in Black America as well. I'm direct/blunt in personal dealings as if I permitted you into my personal life I've come to the conclusion you can handle honesty. Most black women don't like these types. I'm repelled by ratchet/hood tendencies, hypocrisy, and attention seekers. The previous sentence alone disqualifies roughly half of my target demographic (black women). The black women that are on a comparable wave/type of time to mine tend to either date out/have date cacs, are third wave feminists/intersectionalists, or are whitewashed/into white culture.
I'm also a homebody, and an introvert. I have great people skills, I just use them only when necessary, because I don't like most people. I'm not spontaneous and am consistent/predictable. Frankly by the time I'm your age they'll be droves of women I can choose from, but that's not because I'll change, it's because they'll be done having fun, and be looking for that "consistency". This is why by the time I'm your age I'm not looking anymore
I've been told and suspect I could get better women/women I'm more compatible with on the east coast/down south, but I don't want to live in either region it's Cali or Canada in the near term.
It's worth noting I'm comfortable alone, and am fine being alone for the remainder of my life, I'd like a wife and a family but it's an ultimate quality over quantity situation. If the woman I want doesn't come along, I'm not going to just have kids with some woman, if anything I'd adopt.
And I do respect on the mutual tip, I generally treat people with respect and give the benefit of the doubt, until the give me a reason not to. I treat people with respect, even though I don't know them well enough/long enough to respect them as individuals. When people can't reciprocate this I don't tolerate them. I will either check them or ignore them completely. If this is what you deem "offended" so be it.
You 22?
I got a kid older than you.
Let me remind you, I was dating the generation of mothers of the women you're dating now..
Generation X gave our children way to much, compared to the previous boomer generation. The girls were placed too high on pedestals at birth and some boys too. And it abruptly ends at H.S graduation.. So with an undeveloped cerebral vortex at 20ish years old, she thinks she's still supposed to be treated that way..
If the girls were raised without much from birth, they'd appreciate more when they finally get things.. Thats why the kids of the boomers, and the boomers themselves, were the "lets work it out generation".. We didn't have much, so we had to work shyt out..
Y'all youngters spoiled as fck and if it don't go Y'all way Y'all about to die..
So IMHO, just mingle and don't get serious now breh.. The woman thats getting her own hair and nails done, that can treat you to something. Pay a little more attention to her.. See if its some things worth working out with her, if you're really digging her..
Its going to be relationship hell until closer to 30.. Enjoy the ride..
You 22?
I got a kid older than you.
Let me remind you, I was dating the generation of mothers of the women you're dating now..
Generation X gave our children way to much, compared to the previous boomer generation. The girls were placed too high on pedestals at birth and some boys too. And it abruptly ends at H.S graduation.. So with an undeveloped cerebral vortex at 20ish years old, she thinks she's still supposed to be treated that way..
If the girls were raised without much from birth, they'd appreciate more when they finally get things.. Thats why the kids of the boomers, and the boomers themselves, were the "lets work it out generation".. We didn't have much, so we had to work shyt out..
Y'all youngters spoiled as fck and if it don't go Y'all way Y'all about to die..
So IMHO, just mingle and don't get serious now breh.. The woman thats getting her own hair and nails done, that can treat you to something. Pay a little more attention to her.. See if its some things worth working out with her, if you're really digging her..
Its going to be relationship hell until closer to 30.. Enjoy the ride..
To the first bolded, most of these women who are legitimately doing it with money they earned for themselves (as opposed to parents, simps, or sugar babies) are selling their bodies either straight up hoeing (prostitutes), implied hoing (IG modeling/onlyfans), or mild hoeing (stripping), (again speaking from the San Diego/SoCal perspective, I know it's not like this everywhere). Though I transfer to OC in the fall and after I get vaccinated I'll move around more and do the shyt I like to do (niche hip-hop concerts, lowkey lounges, secluded parks etc.) If something pops up great if not, that's fine too.
To the second bolded, I've already been told by multiple women that, I'll make a great husband someday for someone. I'm not here to play clean up man, or take in reformed hoes, I'm done by 28, barring a catastrophic setback. A big mistake men make is getting with women after they make money, or once the women are out of their prime, if they don't like me broke, I don't need them when well off.
Regardless of a women, I'll be
People aren't getting married out of boredom. Most marriages end because of finances.
And if the foundation of a marriage is money, that shyt not gonna last.. Money come and goes. So if a marriage is built on something solid, that hardship will be worked through, even during hard times with money.
Shyts hard work.. But its worth it if she's worth it..
OBVIOUSLY, but broads generally don't want men on the come up, so when men get there, they're more hesitant to trust any broad once they arrive. Time and time again it's been said on here that if the only thing dudes had to pay on a divorce was child support and it was capped, and strictly monitored/enforced, with both parties leaving with what they came with, marriage numbers would jump expeditiously. Fact of the matter is most dudes ain't tryna be as broke as I am now in (early 20s) at 37 or 42.
I always am shocked more dudes don't snap. I get it for those who have children because they need mom, but for people who didn't have kids but got divorced and lost a lot naw b. Ol' girl having an accident and Imma see what Russell up to in Bali
22? Man you too young for this marriage talk. Honestly man don't sweat it, focus on yourself and build. Find like-minded women/people to hang it with and have fun.
Most women under 25 just want to have fun and have their backs blown out. Some of them are looking for long-term relationships but it's rare.
Your best market is college chicks breh.. be somewhere with college chicks.. a smart girl 18-21 is you.
I would say, if you're an introvert it's going to be harder for you. Do you have more gregarious male friends that stay around women? Hang out with them. You have to understand, you can't be a 22 year old introvert and expect to get high-quality women without meeting a high quantity of women. Quality women aren't going to flock to you, you need to go to them. Quality women don't tend to come along, you have to go and find them.
You only 22... this talk of being alone is unnecessarily pessimistic. Stay as social as you can manage, build quality relationships with other like-minded males and females. If you do the right things, things will only get better for you. If you can stay social, stay on your business, things will only get better for you breh. You graduated?
You, your peers have been adults for 4 years. You all have a lot of growing and maturing to do.
One thing that has been universally true but is worse now. Is that the top quality men, have their choice and will take all the women they can. They'll happily pump and dump women they wouldn't date seriously. Women below them in appeal were happy with that situation and would eventually settle with someone more their level. Now I think women (and men) think they should get people above their appeal as partners when it's not realistic and that's what you're saying is happening due to social media. Which does make things harder in the market. Due to the internet, insta, dating apps, a highly desirable man can get exponentially more women than they could back in the day. So that small pool of men are having more of the pie.
Also unless you're up financially. Feminism. Or God. Pick your poison.
Women in the Church/Mosque may have some feminist views but they'll default to more traditional gender roles because of Christ/Islam. If they not on that then feminism will be strong as hell.
Women in the Church/Mosque may have some feminist views but they'll default to more traditional gender roles because of Christ/Islam. If they not on that then feminism will be strong as hell.
Flywin Lannister
Superstar
What’s your dress size breh?
Scustin Bieburr
Baby baybee baybee UUUGH
GMB is really more about making the point that marriage is an arrangement that gives women numerous benefits while the drawbacks to men are potentially massive.
Add to the fact that a lot of women aren't realistic about the amount of work that will need to go into the marriage to make it work out. The image they're sold of marriage is unrealistic.
Add to the fact that a lot of women aren't realistic about the amount of work that will need to go into the marriage to make it work out. The image they're sold of marriage is unrealistic.
Your post was my plan from rip, do me live, grow stay debt free but at 30 (barring meeting a quality woman that keeps me here) I'm leaving regardless. Got my eyes on Vancouver. For me once I'm at 75K a year+having a place I own or the finances to cop a place, I'm not really looking. Unless Ms. RIght slides in and checks all the boxes while having comparable income, and is more or less completely agreeable I'm cool. It sounds arrogant but 8/10 times I prefer my own company so being alone isn't an L for me because I'm comfortable in it and have always held that
no company>bad company.
On another I'm very very very vindictive. Yesterday I got into the inner workings of an ex employer and got revenge on some ex-colleagues, who did me dirty by effectively suspending them/pausing their ability to work. I NEVER forget so I'd rather play p*ssy/possum/whatever past a certain point to avoid being hurt than have to teach a lesson to someone who's crossed me. The prospect of a divorce in a vacuum is no problem, it's what you lose in the process not the past time/effort, the future payments, and financial demotion. Nah I'm not having that, it's best that if I can't fullly trust someone or have doubts I just don't