So Yall Really not gon get Married?

[BmoreGorilla]

How could this possibly be the case when women are the main recipients of alimony and child support?

And if marriage is so much of a risk for women why are y’all the main ones pressuring marriage AND the ones filing for divorce 70+% of the time?

A man is only paying alimony if he makes so much more than his wife that her lifestyle would change. And child support wouldn’t have to be paid if he wanted joint custody. All this can be avoided if a man marries a woman who is on his level financially and if things fall apart he files for joint custody

 

[Marci-Senpai]

Ask a bunch of nikkas who can't even get pussay if they are going to get married brehs...

I feel targeted by this post!

 

[JQ Legend]

A man is only paying alimony if he makes so much more than his wife that her lifestyle would change. And child support wouldn’t have to be paid if he wanted joint custody. All this can be avoided if a man marries a woman who is on his level financially and if things fall apart he files for joint custody

This example of a small percentage of marriages and divorces still doesn’t explain how women are worse off financially after a divorce

 

[the bossman]

Is there a factory that just makes this stuff up for y'all to run with? Why do y'all argue exceptions as if they're rules?

The overwhelming majority of all marriages until the 1940s ended with the husband dying either during or three or four years after retiring from his fifty-seventy hour work week doing backbreaking hard labor.

So there were no divorces before 1940 and women always had property rights?

Stop letting your emotion get in the way of thinking clearly about history.

 

[Bossino]

A man is only paying alimony if he makes so much more than his wife that her lifestyle would change. And child support wouldn’t have to be paid if he wanted joint custody. All this can be avoided if a man marries a woman who is on his level financially and if things fall apart he files for joint custody

As if women, particularly black women, love being with a man that makes comparable money to them . Your a good poster so I know you're not being obtuse, I think you're not looking past your personal perspective/experiences though

 

[Bossyyyyy]

I think you're misrepresenting the GMB argument. They aint saying its too hard to run a family, they are saying that they do not want to get married, fullstop.

No sharing of wealth
No chance at divorce
No sharing of assets
etc.

They dont want legality attached to their relationships.


And to that I say... good, dont ever get married.

As a married man, I can say with full honesty that the majority of people should have never gotten married. So many people have no idea what marriage is and what its for and how to move through it. And they they wanna get married? Nah fukk that, 60% divorce says ya'll need to put the ring back in your pocket and send it back to Michaels


Marriage aint for everyone. And the last thing i'm gonna do is shame men who have no intention or skillset for getting married into marriage.

Nail on the head with the legality part.

As a married individual, what are the things that you see making your relationship work?

Good point when you speak of people having no idea what marriage is, but I'll also add that so many people (me included), don't know what a good relationship is/ entails. This part sucks though, because I often wonder where to go to find good information about relationships. Everything makes it seem/ feel like the sexes are at war with eachother and that don't even make sense

 

[™BlackPearl The Empress™]

"Hey single man making an above-average income and living a lifestyle he thinks is fulfilling, you know what you ought to do? Get married. Now I know there are a lot of risks involved, because we grown women basically stop maturing at sixteen and thus don't really know what we want day-to-day, but I've come up with a right proper solution - spend your time you could be doing the things you find already fulfilling learning how to protect yourself!"

It must hurt to "think" how you "think."

Let's revisit a comment a few posts above yours.



What's hard about this, ma'am?

Women take on zero risk in marriage. Men take on all the risk.
And no. It's not "risk" when make up in your head that Michael B. Jordan might have come knocking at your door if hadn't gotten married.

When you ask someone else to form a legal bond with you, where they will be taking on the entire risk burden, YOU need to be the one to convince said someone of outcome is substantially beneficial and YOU need to be the one who ensure you're not the reason the bond is broken. As it stands, the reason (black) men are avoidant of marriage is because (black) women don't want to be married and the black community, which has been matrifocal for three generations now, has suffered immensely for it. In this thread, even most of the guys who are against marriage are only against it due to the legal power women have to bring nothing, yet take away everything. (Black) women, especially in Western societies, have an established track record of not being fit for marriage AND the attitude that (black) men better just put up it. What is it that makes you all believe anyone is pining to deal with that?

I realize you think (black) men are big, dumb wallet-penises who are going to fall for your shyt, but there's a reason why you're middle-aged, used up and have no ring on your own finger, ma'am.

I already said what I had to say. I'm not gotta repeat myself in a repetitive arguement because you have made up your mind and just wanna go back and forth.

Don't get married breh. No one will lose out for it.

 

[Bossyyyyy]

It doesnt matter after 10 years it's called "common law marriage" she"ll still get half

misinformation. only 8 US states allow common law marriage

 

[BmoreGorilla]

This example of a small percentage of marriages and divorces still doesn’t explain how women are worse off financially after a divorce

As if women, particularly black women, love being with a man that makes comparable money to them . Your a good poster so I know you're not being obtuse, I think you're not looking past your personal perspective/experiences though

I don’t think it’s a small percentage tho. It’s 2021. Many women especially black women are earning just as much of not more than men. These women ain’t financially dependent on men anymore which is why they file for divorce at a higher clip

Now as far as women being financially worse after a divorce I can’t speak on that

 

[sosayeth]

So there were no divorces before 1940 and women always had property rights?

Stop letting your emotion get in the way of thinking clearly about history.

Let's take a look at what I actually said.

"The overwhelming majority of all marriages until the 1940s ended with the husband dying either during or three or four years after retiring from his fifty-seventy hour work week doing backbreaking hard labor."

Stop letting your emotions get in the way of basic, kindergarten-level reading comprehension.

 

[sosayeth]

As if women, particularly black women, love being with a man that makes comparable money to them . Your a good poster so I know you're not being obtuse, I think you're not looking past your personal perspective/experiences though

One minute it's, "fukk these nikkas! We make as much money as these broke ass dudes! Economically unavailable men is a THING. I need a man who makes twice or more my income! Yasss, bytch!" The next it's the same dingbat bird brains saying, "Just marry a woman who makes your comparable income."

 

[sosayeth]

Don't get married breh. No one will lose out for it.

Post a picture of your left ring finger.

 

[Bossino]

I don’t think it’s a small percentage tho. It’s 2021. Many women especially black women are earning just as much of not more than men. These women ain’t financially dependent on men anymore which is why they file for divorce at a higher clip

Now as far as women being financially worse after a divorce I can’t speak on that

THATS THE POINT OG, women especially BW don't want a man on their level, they want one above, looks wise, money wise, etc. But there simply isn't enough of those men to go around. Hell between incarceration, and early death there statistically isn't enough black men of ANY ilk. So when these bw eventually attempt to settle down (if they're aren't too old, too unattractive/out of shape, or don't have too many kids for men to bush them altogether), they have resentment already stored for the man they with, because they felt they should've got more aka a better man. This along with seeing the man as a placeholder, or a ho retirement package leads to divorce

 

[BmoreGorilla]

THATS THE POINT OG, women especially BW don't want a man on their level, they want one above, looks wise, money wise, etc. But there simply isn't enough of those men to go around. Hell between incarceration, and early death there statistically isn't enough black men of ANY ilk. So when these bw eventually attempt to settle down (if they're aren't too old, too unattractive/out of shape, or don't have too many kids for men to bush them altogether), they have resentment already stored for the man they with, because they felt they should've got more aka a better man. This along with seeing the man as a placeholder, or a ho retirement package leads to divorce

But that was also the point I’m trying to make about alimony and child support. If a woman ends up settling for someone financially she won’t be getting alimony if there is a divorce

 

[TRUEST]

This isn't true breh.

There is an important financial risk for men. Women risk everything else.

Like what?