What's your breaking point in a relationship/marriage?

[GoGetMyDamnBelt_]

How are you settling?

He told me as long as he has already paid whatever portion of the bills that needed to be paid in the month, he can give his extra income to his family. I'm telling him that that extra could be saved whether it's for emergencies, towards purchasing a house (that we are planning), vacation (that we are planning for the end of the year), we even plan to renew our vows on our 5th anniversary & do the wedding that we never got to do the first time. If I want to pay our rent a month, 2-3 or 4 months in advance, I want to be able to have that option but we can't because what's extra that could've added up is feeding other people's mouth. What he's doing is settling, what he's okay doing is living pay check to pay check. If either one of us were to loose our jobs, we'd be homeless because there's no backup funds.
He told me since I'm good with the saving, to continue doing what I'm doing and he'll do what he's doing. We're supposed to be a team in this, yet he knows how to make me feel isolated in certain situations.

 

[Aceofspades404]

cheating.

 

[Swirv]

He told me as long as he has already paid whatever portion of the bills that needed to be paid in the month, he can give his extra income to his family. I'm telling him that that extra could be saved whether it's for emergencies, towards purchasing a house (that we are planning), vacation (that we are planning for the end of the year), we even plan to renew our vows on our 5th anniversary & do the wedding that we never got to do the first time. If I want to pay our rent a month, 2-3 or 4 months in advance, I want to be able to have that option but we can't because what's extra that could've added up is feeding other people's mouth. What he's doing is settling, what he's okay doing is living pay check to pay check. If either one of us were to loose our jobs, we'd be homeless because there's no backup funds.
He told me since I'm good with the saving, to continue doing what I'm doing and he'll do what he's doing. We're supposed to be a team in this, yet he knows how to make me feel isolated in certain situations.

I see where you're coming from. Are you willing to compromise with him on how much disposable income he dedicates to his family?

 

[scarlxrd]

Lack of ambition or goals has always been the breaking point for me. I hate being stagnant because someone else doesn't know what they want to do.

 

[GoGetMyDamnBelt_]

I see where you're coming from. Are you willing to compromise with him on how much disposable income he dedicates to his family?

I was then again, I can't trust that he would. I can agree to $200 a month but then next week someone asks for a set amount and he gives it. I can't trust that he'll stick to what we agree on. At this point, it's all lost. I'm finished trying

 

[Swirv]

I was then again, I can't trust that he would. I can agree to $200 a month but then next week someone asks for a set amount and he gives it. I can't trust that he'll stick to what we agree on. At this point, it's all lost. I'm finished trying

See if he'll agree to it. At least give him a chance.

Are you happy with him besides the money issue?

 

[GoGetMyDamnBelt_]

See if he'll agree to it. At least give him a chance.

Are you happy with him besides the money issue?

Its been hot and cold for the last year due to emotional issues. He's done ALOT of damages since we got married. From disrespecting me to texting and going out with other chikks. I told him sleeping with someone else isn't the only form of cheating but he has cheated by talking to others as he talks to me, giving him their time as he does me, I believe he hasn't slept around on me. I strongly do but he did other forms of cheating.
The whole year of 2015 he's been a changed man. More considerate, talks to me better yet I can't help the feeling of resentment because somehow, some way, he'll disappoint me. That's why for the year of 2015 I've always had one foot out the door thus causing our relationship to be strain and hot & cold. I saw the money issue as icing on the cake.

 

[Poitier]

Its been hot and cold for the last year due to emotional issues. He's done ALOT of damages since we got married. From disrespecting me to texting and going out with other chikks. I told him sleeping with someone else isn't the only form of cheating but he has cheated by talking to others as he talks to me, giving him their time as he does me, I believe he hasn't slept around on me. I strongly do but he did other forms of cheating.
The whole year of 2015 he's been a changed man. More considerate, talks to me better yet I can't help the feeling of resentment because somehow, some way, he'll disappoint me. That's why for the year of 2015 I've always had one foot out the door thus causing our relationship to be strain and hot & cold. I saw the money issue as icing on the cake.

Just leave.

 

[GoGetMyDamnBelt_]

Just leave.

what happened to staying within my own men?

 

[Poitier]

what happened to staying within my own men?

I can't help the feeling of resentment because somehow, some way, he'll disappoint me. That's why for the year of 2015 I've always had one foot out the door thus causing our relationship to be strain and hot & cold. I saw the money issue as icing on the cake.

Its over when you feel like this.

 

[GoGetMyDamnBelt_]

Its over when you feel like this.

... yeah, I figured

 

[Poitier]

... yeah, I figured

Or goto counseling ASAP.

 

[GoGetMyDamnBelt_]

Or goto counseling ASAP.

Nah, I've already told him we're done. Haven't spoke to him in like 3 days since I called it quits on him.

 

[Melza]

This is sad. I'm sorry OP. But if it's done, then it's done. Move on and keep it cordial.

 

[Swirv]

Its been hot and cold for the last year due to emotional issues. He's done ALOT of damages since we got married. From disrespecting me to texting and going out with other chikks. I told him sleeping with someone else isn't the only form of cheating but he has cheated by talking to others as he talks to me, giving him their time as he does me, I believe he hasn't slept around on me. I strongly do but he did other forms of cheating.
The whole year of 2015 he's been a changed man. More considerate, talks to me better yet I can't help the feeling of resentment because somehow, some way, he'll disappoint me. That's why for the year of 2015 I've always had one foot out the door thus causing our relationship to be strain and hot & cold. I saw the money issue as icing on the cake.

If he has changed his past behaviors let it go. Try to see from is point of view too. If you want to make this relationship work try to compromise. Sounds like he i willing too since he stopped doing the things you/ve mentioned. Good men are hard to find.