Why do some men act like talking to women is rocket science?

[Mr. Jack Napier]

Most people struggle with walking up to strangers and engaging in conversation.

The fact you don't know whether that person would want to be bothered is the biggest fear.

You can wait for a woman to "show interest" but depending on how attractive you are/versus how picky you are, it could be a while before you get a good opportunity.

It's not rocket science if a woman you deem attractive is eyeballing you. But for a lot of brehs, that doesn't happen, therefore they have to force the issue and put pressure on their conversation skills to create the opportunity.

Also, for some guys, they have to hold their personality back, to not come off as lame. I had to learn through years of trial and error as to what not to say around women.

That's pretty much the sum of it. For example, if I see an attractive woman that I like, but she's not even looking in my direction, I don't even bother, because in my mind, she's not interested. And if she's not interested, then I'm not going to waste my energy or neither of our time trying to spark up a conversation.

My problem has always been either picking up signals or starting off the convo. But once I get introduced, i'm good money.

 

[Weaver31]

You don't have to be a social butterfly, babe

But the levels of social anxiety among today's young men is weird.

Like, they really have to figure out what is causing this mental health pandemic.

Shti is weird.

Too many people online...too zoned in on social media, websites, and playing games online and on their phones and tablets. Too many young folks grow up doing this and they lack the social skills....not all but a very noticeable amount. Also too many young men grow up in single family homes and they can miss life lessons learned from their father...especially if an older bro, uncle, male mentor, older more socially experienced friend, etc. don't step in and be that role model. I know dudes my age and younger men and you can tell they missed some life shyt throughout their adolescence...even the intelligent and educated ones. Also lack of father figure or male influence can cause some men do develop more feminine or soft ways...not all males but it happens very frequently.

Then women do have some social power where they can diss a man who approach them and that can fuk a man's confidence and self-esteem up. Most self respecting men would just be like fuk her and move on but if their confidence is low...it can fuk up their soul.

But one older coworker did tell me she notice people nowadays take so many meds and have so many personality disorders, mental issues, and other shyt. Maybe its environment, something in the food or water...who knows....but like u said...some others noticed the change. Not that mental issues and social anxiety didn't occur in the past...its just more diagnosed and noticed nowadays.

 

[International Playa]

You don't have to be a social butterfly, babe

But the levels of social anxiety among today's young men is weird.

Like, they really have to figure out what is causing this mental health pandemic.

Shti is weird.

Too much porn & fapping

 

[Sccit]

CUZ MOST FOLKS HAVE SOMETHIN CALLED ANXIETY THAT GETS IN THE WAY

IT BECOMES CONTAGIOUS WHEN U ARE AROUND BIITCHASS PEOPLE FOR TOO LONG

WHEN U GOT GOOD PEOPLES AROUND U, IT CHANGES EVERYTHING

OP U PROLLY KEEP GOOD COMPANY. DOPE BRAG THREAD BRODIE.

 

[ZoeGod]

Honestly, a lot of their fathers failed them by not teaching game. Most of them don't have cousins or family members to teach game. They hang around with the same bum nikkas who are bad with women. And when you do not progress you regress.

 

[Spin]

Reading body language is what it comes down to. Some people just can't read the signs.
For some people, like myself, if you have self esteem issues it doesn't matter how handsome you are, you'll always struggle talking to women because you're not comfortable with yourself.
No one likes rejection. That alone stops men from talking to a woman who may be feeling you but for woman reasons won't tell you.

Well at least you admit your issue that's the first step to overcoming.

Next step is working on yourself man. The most cliche but easy way to move in the right direction is to start working out. You will start feeling a whole lot better which will feed into other things. Set small goals like getting up before 6 am 3-5 times a week. That alone will put you into the top 15% of morning risers. When you see improvements in yourself, you start noticing people really aren't that special and you will respect hustle over just looks.

It's a mental shift, but it will occur for you if you have Desire to change.

 

[Pimp]

This shyt is like baseball man.. just swing brehs.. if you get 4 out of 10 chicks you're batting 400 which is great... 3 out of 10 still good.. 2 out of 10 you need work.. the law of averages my nikkaz...

 

[TLR Is Mental Poison]

A lot of brehs make it a lot harder than it needs to be with just how they approach women. I have found women are a lot less receptive and on guard with the cold approach... I am not handsome or charismatic enough for that shyt. But I never really had problems with women as I knew how to meet them in other ways. It's way easier (AND SAFER) to date women you know first. Problem is I think a lot of dudes don't have many friends or really know anybody period

 

[RTF]

It's not as easy as you're suggesting OP. This has been an issue for men for years.

I take rejection well, so i'm eating out here. But for some men they struggle with that. If I wasn't out here shooting from all angles, I would be in that same position.

And there's always levels to it.

 

[RTF]

A lot of brehs make it a lot harder than it needs to be with just how they approach women. I have found women are a lot less receptive and on guard with the cold approach... I am not handsome or charismatic enough for that shyt. But I never really had problems with women as I knew how to meet them in other ways. It's way easier (AND SAFER) to date women you know first. Problem is I think a lot of dudes don't have many friends or really know anybody period

Women are with the cold approach when liquor is involved. And as a man it's easier to handle rejection in that situation. Cos you can jump right back in and nobody will notice.

 

[ChaddyLack]

Breh, some dudes really need to get out of their own head.


Short nikkas out here eatin
Ugly nikkas out here eatin
Broke nikkas out here eatin
Fat nikkas out here eatin.

First 3 posts been the Coli equivalent of DMX first 3 albums, nothing but damn TRUTH!



preach my Coli brethren.

 

[Tom Foolery]

I've said this before. Dudes overplay having a mouthpiece. A lot of people take this pimp/player shyt to heart because that's probably all they have going for them.

You guys overplay having a mouthpiece. You act like every woman is a hoe that has to be talked out of giving p*ssy. This fake pimp mentality needs to stop.

 

[Ohene]

Approaching them isn't the hard part

Trying to get them to let their guard down, stop playing games and fukkin them is

 

[TLR Is Mental Poison]

Women are with the cold approach when liquor is involved. And as a man it's easier to handle rejection in that situation. Cos you can jump right back in and nobody will notice.

I would argue this is not necessarily the case. A lot of times when women are out drinking they are in packs. And you know there's always that one ugly friend playing defense

And if anything nikkas get way more emotional and sensitive when liquor is involved. So nah. Even if what u say is true.... u can't be drunk all the time. Don't use liquor as a crutch

 

[EA]

I don't get what the big deal is around "talking" to women. Women are people. My success with women increased exponentially once I stopped looking at women like they're sacred creatures and just spoke to them normally. They piss and shyt just like us