Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[Ohene]

and EMOTIONALLY managing all those texts. All those invites. how do you do that? That would be exhausting, even if you don't want to ghost, you eventually are like fukk, this is too much.

I get it. The other night one of these girls I probably complained about in here ghosting me, she was apologizing and we were talking about it, but I was like I understand. It's always cool between us, we've been close for 10 plus years. She had a dozen plus guys, probably more, straight up harassing her every day.

to be honest, its only really exhausting for people who aint worth shyt in the first place.

i was talking to my homie about this. a lot of the things these women (and maybe even some men) do:

- arriving late all the time
- ignoring messages
- give silent treatment when angry
- not admit wrong-doing, instead choosing to deflect
- etc.

are not done by people who actually have substance or are doing well in life . and because they dont do these things, they have gotten to good places in life life and have actually built good relationships with people - be it romantic, professional, friendly, etc. If somebody finds it 'exhausting' to not only respond to messages but communicate effectively, this deficiency probably permeates throughout their life and they are likely to just be a shyt, messy person in general.

somebody who is on time for dates, is generally going to be on time, reliable and organized for a lot of things in life. they wont procrastinate on tasks; they wont flop on engagements/meetings; they wont forget about plans they made etc.

somebody who is responsive through text msgs is likely going to be responsive to emails, phone calls etc. whether it is at work or in their personal lives

I can keep going. Point is, a person who is an a$$hole and lacks common courtesy when it comes to dating is likely just an a$$hole all around.

 

[re'up]

to be honest, its only really exhausting for people who aint worth shyt in the first place.

i was talking to my homie about this. a lot of the things these women (and maybe even some men) do:

- arriving late all the time
- ignoring messages
- give silent treatment when angry
- not admit wrong-doing, instead choosing to deflect
- etc.

are not done by people who actually have substance or are doing well in life . and because they dont do these things, they have gotten to where they are in life and have actually built good relationships with people - be it romantic, professional, friendly, etc. If somebody finds it 'exhausting' to not only respond to messages but communicate effectively, this deficiency probably permeates throughout their life and they are likely to just be a shyt person in general.

somebody who is on time for dates, is generally going to be on time, reliable and organized for a lot of things in life. they wont procrastinate on tasks; they wont flop on engagements/meetings; they wont forget about plans they made etc.

somebody who is responsive through text msgs is likely going to be responsive to emails, phone calls etc. whether it is at work or in their personal lives

I can keep going. Point is, a person who is an a$$hole and lacks common courtesy when it comes to dating is likely just an a$$hole all around.

Lot of truth to this. Like looking at someone's car or bedroom, or PHONE lol is a good indicator of overall lifestyle.

but a lot of the super bad girls, like bad girls club types or going to be some degree of messy and chaotic. You factor that in.

 

[Ohene]

This is just me talking,---that same kind of thing that you (and I) dislike, lets say the idea that you HAVE to take them to whatever place. Or whatever the demand was or they aren't going to talk to you

that's the same as ME thinking that if someone doesn't respond to me in EXACTLY the way I want, when I want then I am done with them forever.

It's the same rigidness, just applied differently. I don't mean that I am going to wait in anyone's que, I will probably just ask someone else, but I will be willing to engage when they are. I guess that's a difference.

thats where youre wrong...because i dont think anyone here is saying "if the woman doesnt respond within an hour and say this exact message then I am done"

they are simply saying that a woman should be responsive and generally cooperative in the early stages. I dont care if a girl responds within one hour or 5 hours...but sometimes its obvious they are on some bullshyt.

even my story which kicked off this discussion, I was [foolishly] giving shorty the benefit of the doubt. If there is any rigidness that men are applying in these scenarios it is because these women time and time again do not reward you for giving them the benefit of the doubt/leeway. It is also because they dont afford us any leeway whatsoever. And perhaps you may want to counter in saying that women have this same approach in when they try to dictate, rigidly, what a man must do to take them out due to past negative experiences. I would call bullshyt though, because in my story above the same women tried to insinuate that she is used to men taking her to fancy upscale spaces so that the minimum/standard for her. And what would my response to that be? Where are those guys now? Women dont have these obscene expectations as some sort of defense mechanism; nah, its just delusion and entitlement. Dont get it twisted.

 

[Ohene]

They communicate in memes
It’s giving ______
That’s such a vibe

this irish-naija girl i know told me when she came to toronto she couldnt believe how wrapped up in social media the women were.

she used that corny ass "its giving" phrase as an example of how these women literally approach life likes its a meme or some shyt. I didnt realize how bad it was until she pointed it out (and cause i was in a relationship for the most part in the last few years but man...its rampant

 

[Ohene]

@re'up i fukk with you pause but you and i both know that the more we give these women these excuses the more we enable their dumbass behavior

i will admit i am sometimes part of the problem. if all men stopped tolerating the bs they would fix up somewhat (theoretically)

 

[re'up]

thats where youre wrong...because i dont think anyone here is saying "if the woman doesnt respond within an hour and say this exact message then I am done"

they are simply saying that a woman should be responsive and generally cooperative in the early stages. I dont care if a girl responds within one hour or 5 hours...but sometimes its obvious they are on some bullshyt.

even my story which kicked off this discussion, I was [foolishly] giving shorty the benefit of the doubt. If there is any rigidness that men are applying in these scenarios it is because these women time and time again do not reward you for giving them the benefit of the doubt/leeway. It is also because they dont afford us any leeway whatsoever. And perhaps you may want to counter in saying that women have this same approach in when they try to dictate, rigidly, what a man must do to take them out due to past negative experiences. I would call bullshyt though, because in my story above the same women tried to insinuate that she is used to men taking her to fancy upscale spaces so that the minimum/standard for her. And what would my response to that be? Where are those guys now? Women dont have these obscene expectations as some sort of defense mechanism; nah, its just delusion and entitlement. Dont get it twisted.

That sounds reasonable to me, sometimes I'm referencing situations that are more ongoing, and just not clarifying because of space or whatever. In the first stages, it's pretty important to establish some foundation, for sure. Like I know this situation very well. Meet someone, have a great/good interaction, even make a plan, and lead with the plan, and even say "Are you really down", and then get ghosted. Usually I won't bother with a follow up. But, I could. Like I was saying, it's a slot machine.

the emotionality of some people, you could easily text a week later, and get that responsiveness you wanted. Professionals are generally way more responsive/good communicators, whereas the bottle service/club deep in the game ones are more chaotic and all over the place, communication wise.

 

[RaspberryFitted]

all this may be true but even if it is, who wants to be lining up in a queue waiting to talk to a bytch
it is what it is...if she feeling you she will respond more times.

i aint tryna be a c00n but i honestly have noticed non-black women are far more easy to make plans with and that they are cool doing basic shyt like going for walks, coffee etc. the black women who are i find arent from toronto and are from smaller european/carribean cities and shyt

hate that for you man

Might just be you living in Toronto

 

[WIA20XX]

Call me a hater, but I just don't give any grace to women, at all. I've learned, but I wish I knew and practiced it way earlier.

They max out their physical attractiveness, put themselves in the spotlight, but then complain when they get attention, or don't know how to handle it - and then blame the very same people that they're trying to attract.

They then engage in anti-social behavior that we're just supposed to accept. We're supposed to have sympathy.
You know, "Things happen".

No. I do not accept it.

And I don't think any of the brothers should accept it either.

It's blatant and constant disrespect.

And most guys will find that they need to command respect from the very start and at all times until the grave, in order to facilitate anything healthy - be it short term or long term.

Even when you got broads blowing you up, and checking for you in public - a woman's attention is not enough. It will never be enough. Her attention span is short. They change hairstyles everyday, if not morning to afternoon to evening. She can be digging you one moment, and then be disgusted the next.

Expecting reliability from a chick is foolish.

Expecting respect though...

If she doesn't respect you, she doesn't deserve your protection, time, attention, and definitely not your resources.

If we're talking about texting - it's about expectations. If you hit a chick up this afternoon and she don't get back to you until later that evening - fine. You can make your own rules about how "good" a texter a chick needs to be.

For example - you'll be back and forth with a chick on text, and you get to some important point - something that requires a response - and the chick will just ghost - because she doensn't want to answer, doesn't want to commit, something better might come along, etc.

No. Her lack of response, lack of timely response is answer enough. That's your answer.

• If she says no, she means no.
• If she says, we'll see, she means no.
• If she says maybe, she means no.
• If she hesitates, she means no.

Block the chick and move on.

If you see the chick out and about, don't even acknowledge her. Keep it moving, and by it, I mean your life.

If that means you miss out on this particular broad, there are 4 billion other women in the world.

She's not special, especially in those early days.

If that's the only chick that is even entertaining your communication - you have a pipeline problem.

 

[Ohene]

hate that for you man

Might just be you living in Toronto

It’s a numbers game
I doubt LA, NY etc any different really

 

[Ohene]

This chick who was sick asks if I’m free this morning. I am watching arsenal and just finished at the gym so I say nah. She was gonna invite me to breakfast but I said we can do lunch instead if she feels better now. She says she’s functional and she’s down

The lunch spot is located west of me. She lives east of me - a 10 min walk away. I tell her she can come to my ends and then we go there or we can meet at the spot. She asking me to come to her ends before we go instead. I say nah, cause it’s the opposite direction. She says she didn’t know that she had to explain but she has shortness of breath and can’t walk to my area etc etc.

Lmfao. These women are insane

Not even going to respond

The same women said she’s functional, but apparently has shortness of breath that is too much to walk for ten mins.

 

[The ADD]

lol any good stories because these last few pages…..

 

[WIA20XX]

The same women said she’s functional, but apparently has shortness of breath that is too much to walk for ten mins.

She dying to see you, or dying for a meal lol?

And when I had dat 'Vid, shortness of breath was the thing that scared me the most.

Let the heifer recuperate on her own time and dime, imo.

 

[Ohene]

She dying to see you, or dying for a meal lol?

And when I had dat 'Vid, shortness of breath was the thing that scared me the most.

Let the heifer recuperate on her own time and dime, imo.

same thing i thought
if you have shortness of breath then stay your ass home lol, fukk you tryna link for

 

[FLYINHAWAIIAN]

yup like I said everyone is looking at their phone hours a day. That to busy to text woman is texting someone else.

Yep. These hoes will be like, "I'ma call you back when I get off". And you don't hear from that broad for like 3 weeks.
shyt my phone dry now cuz the last two chicks never hit me up later that day.

I ain't texting/calling a damn thing no more

 

[The ADD]

Yep. These hoes will be like, "I'ma call you back when I get off". And you don't hear from that broad for like 3 weeks.
shyt my phone dry now cuz the last two chicks never hit me up later that day.

I ain't texting/calling a damn thing no more