Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[Lieutenant Daniels]

Of course it’s situational but I figure most women that like a guy at the beginning stages will want to or be open to chatting throughout the day.

In my experience I noticed a direct correlation between texting frequency and interest level.

 

[BaggerofTea]

Possibly but not for certain. When I first started dating my wife, I was pretty adamant that I wasn’t a phone call or FT person she took that and didn’t complain.

I think you have to ask/learn what she means by communication. Is it checking in to see if she’s good, longer text exchange about how here day is going? Text about something you saw that might be interesting to her? What she wants might not be a big stretch for you.

words of wisdom

 

[Lieutenant Daniels]

Well the girl that I’ve been seeing since September (talked about her in this thread back in January) broke up with me this past Friday

Shot my shot at this girl at my gym Saturday. I know her mom (which I didn’t know until I saw the two of them together Saturday talking and they called me over, and her mom loves me). Everything is friendly and enthusiastic during our face to face conversation. I text her later that day, she responds a couple times then I get left on read after asking a direct question about the band she went to go see earlier that day. See her in the gym Sunday and the energy is mad weird but yet she keeps looking at me when we’re in different areas and waved when we made initial eye contact. Text her later to set up something for this weekend, she doesn’t respond for 5 hrs and then when she does she says she has plans for the day I asked about and never offered a counter date. Aka not interested which is stupid cause all she gotta say is she’s seeing someone and I would’ve deaded it. Instead acting autistic comes naturally to these chicks and now it’s awkward cause I’m still cool with her mom.

Say all that to say I’m not looking forward to the dating game again. Shyt is a major drag and time wasting.

 

[The ADD]

Well the girl that I’ve been seeing since September (talked about her in this thread back in January) broke up with me this past Friday

Shot my shot at this girl at my gym Saturday. I know her mom (which I didn’t know until I saw the two of them together Saturday talking and they called me over, and her mom loves me). Everything is friendly and enthusiastic during our face to face conversation. I text her later that day, she responds a couple times then I get left on read after asking a direct question about the band she went to go see earlier that day. See her in the gym Sunday and the energy is mad weird but yet she keeps looking at me when we’re in different areas and waved when we made initial eye contact. Text her later to set up something for this weekend, she doesn’t respond for 5 hrs and then when she does she says she has plans for the day I asked about and never offered a counter date. Aka not interested which is stupid cause all she gotta say is she’s seeing someone and I would’ve deaded it. Instead acting autistic comes naturally to these chicks and now it’s awkward cause I’m still cool with her mom.

Say all that to say I’m not looking forward to the dating game again. Shyt is a major drag and time wasting.

What happened?

 

[Lieutenant Daniels]

What happened?

Man I really couldn’t tell you. She’s adamant that she loves me and thinks I’m a great guy relationship wise. She said Friday that I’m her best friend and it hurts her to do this because there’s nothing wrong with the relationship. Which I already knew because everything is fine outside of her personal struggles.

So back in January we spilt for a week or so but maintained contact because she said she needed to work on herself, which I noticed her mental state deteriorating over last November and December until it all came to a head this January. She scheduled therapy and started that after we started the relationship back like a week later. Since then every facet of our relationship was excellent. Usually I can point to one particular problem or challenge in the relationship but for the first time I’m drawing a blank. Her family likes me and I’ve been over to her family’s place several times for her family events. Just wished her mom a happy Mother’s Day.

Over the last few weeks though she started reverting back to the same behaviors as what I recognized last November and December. Low energy, separating herself socially, low motivation but never necessarily directed at me just in general. Outside of that she was very loving and attentive to me. Hell last weekend we spent all weekend together and had a good time.

I knew something was off cause my gut was telling me something was off but like I said I can’t point to one particular thing in the relationship because truthfully there wasn’t anything. I think that’s the part that leaves a man broken or “sad” because usually there’s SOMETHING that you can point to and say “yeah I see why”. First time in my 40 years of life I can confidently say I don’t know what happened.

 

[The ADD]

Man I really couldn’t tell you. She’s adamant that she loves me and thinks I’m a great guy relationship wise. She said Friday that I’m her best friend and it hurts her to do this because there’s nothing wrong with the relationship. Which I already knew because everything is fine outside of her personal struggles.

So back in January we spilt for a week or so but maintained contact because she said she needed to work on herself, which I noticed her mental state deteriorating over last November and December until it all came to a head this January. She scheduled therapy and started that after we started the relationship back like a week later. Since then every facet of our relationship was excellent. Usually I can point to one particular problem or challenge in the relationship but for the first time I’m drawing a blank. Her family likes me and I’ve been over to her family’s place several times for her family events. Just wished her mom a happy Mother’s Day.

Over the last few weeks though she started reverting back to the same behaviors as what I recognized last November and December. Low energy, separating herself socially, low motivation but never necessarily directed at me just in general. Outside of that she was very loving and attentive to me. Hell last weekend we spent all weekend together and had a good time.

I knew something was off cause my gut was telling me something was off but like I said I can’t point to one particular thing in the relationship because truthfully there wasn’t anything. I think that’s the part that leaves a man broken or “sad” because usually there’s SOMETHING that you can point to and say “yeah I see why”. First time in my 40 years of life I can confidently say I don’t know what happened.

That’s tough and sorry to hear it. The positive is that it wasn’t you and to some degree it’s her but a deeper issue. Sounds like she was malicious with anything but has some healing to do.

That said it sucks so not going to tell you to just move on

 

[Lieutenant Daniels]

That’s tough and sorry to hear it. The positive is that it wasn’t you and to some degree it’s her but a deeper issue. Sounds like she was malicious with anything but has some healing to do.

That said it sucks not going to tell you to just move on

Thank you breh. It’s tough man. I really liked this girl. We spent all last weekend together and had a good time, she left my house that following Tuesday morning and that was that.

Right now I’m just going to take the time to look inward at what I can do better for the next woman that God places in front of me. They say everything happens for a reason but damn I’d like to know cause this doesn’t make any sense right now.

I’ve been through heartbreak before but in those I knew what was messed up in the relationship and my roll in those situations. But damn. Smh.

 

[African_brehda]

Man, I fumbled so bad I might as well switch gyms

Chick I’ve been looking at for a while, basically approached me, gave me her number… we hangout, I make my move, she lets me know there’s a situation she’s healing from..

I tell her to reconsider, and I don’t speak to her the rest of the day. At this point, I know it’s not going to workout.. I basically let it go.

Then she calls me in the evening, so I’m like, it’s on. Then like a fukking pathetic breh I tend to be sometimes, I proceed to text her a sentimental paragraph before I sleep. I got left on delivered brehs

She sees me at the gym today, says hi, I reply back, and ignore her the whole session, and leave without saying goodbye or anything. She then calls me when I get home, we talk a bit, then she proceeds to text me to “check in”, completely ignoring the sappy shyt I sent earlier. I’m confused

 

[MikelArteta]

Man I really couldn’t tell you. She’s adamant that she loves me and thinks I’m a great guy relationship wise. She said Friday that I’m her best friend and it hurts her to do this because there’s nothing wrong with the relationship. Which I already knew because everything is fine outside of her personal struggles.

So back in January we spilt for a week or so but maintained contact because she said she needed to work on herself, which I noticed her mental state deteriorating over last November and December until it all came to a head this January. She scheduled therapy and started that after we started the relationship back like a week later. Since then every facet of our relationship was excellent. Usually I can point to one particular problem or challenge in the relationship but for the first time I’m drawing a blank. Her family likes me and I’ve been over to her family’s place several times for her family events. Just wished her mom a happy Mother’s Day.

Over the last few weeks though she started reverting back to the same behaviors as what I recognized last November and December. Low energy, separating herself socially, low motivation but never necessarily directed at me just in general. Outside of that she was very loving and attentive to me. Hell last weekend we spent all weekend together and had a good time.

I knew something was off cause my gut was telling me something was off but like I said I can’t point to one particular thing in the relationship because truthfully there wasn’t anything. I think that’s the part that leaves a man broken or “sad” because usually there’s SOMETHING that you can point to and say “yeah I see why”. First time in my 40 years of life I can confidently say I don’t know what happened.

Breaks always lead to breakups it was over from that point.

It sucks but best thing you can do is move on. That's how it is with many women they missing you , calling you great on Friday and cold and saying it's done.

If you did your best nothing more you can do

 

[MikelArteta]

Thank you breh. It’s tough man. I really liked this girl. We spent all last weekend together and had a good time, she left my house that following Tuesday morning and that was that.

Right now I’m just going to take the time to look inward at what I can do better for the next woman that God places in front of me. They say everything happens for a reason but damn I’d like to know cause this doesn’t make any sense right now.

I’ve been through heartbreak before but in those I knew what was messed up in the relationship and my roll in those situations. But damn. Smh.

It sucks breh but you just have to remind yourself you did your best. And continue to push forward. I've been there many times you think it's all going well and then poof. One day you'll look back and

I remember when things ended with my ex fiance it was 2017 this was the woman I thought I was going to marry. I was a wreck for years, id sabotage good relationships and continue hoping one day we'd be together again.

Now it's 2025 and I'm married to the love of my life and my daughter was just born a few days ago. Even a few years ago this seemed like a miracle but I can now look back and be like

If I married that woman I'd prob be so pressed and prob even divorced by now.

 

[trap101-ETHout-Allegri-In]

Man I really couldn’t tell you. She’s adamant that she loves me and thinks I’m a great guy relationship wise. She said Friday that I’m her best friend and it hurts her to do this because there’s nothing wrong with the relationship. Which I already knew because everything is fine outside of her personal struggles.

So back in January we spilt for a week or so but maintained contact because she said she needed to work on herself, which I noticed her mental state deteriorating over last November and December until it all came to a head this January. She scheduled therapy and started that after we started the relationship back like a week later. Since then every facet of our relationship was excellent. Usually I can point to one particular problem or challenge in the relationship but for the first time I’m drawing a blank. Her family likes me and I’ve been over to her family’s place several times for her family events. Just wished her mom a happy Mother’s Day.

Over the last few weeks though she started reverting back to the same behaviors as what I recognized last November and December. Low energy, separating herself socially, low motivation but never necessarily directed at me just in general. Outside of that she was very loving and attentive to me. Hell last weekend we spent all weekend together and had a good time.

I knew something was off cause my gut was telling me something was off but like I said I can’t point to one particular thing in the relationship because truthfully there wasn’t anything. I think that’s the part that leaves a man broken or “sad” because usually there’s SOMETHING that you can point to and say “yeah I see why”. First time in my 40 years of life I can confidently say I don’t know what happened.

Sounds like the pernicious pecking of eternal FOMO...... that one "thrill" in whatever realm it may be that she is "missing out on" by being with you.....

 

[trap101-ETHout-Allegri-In]

Man, I fumbled so bad I might as well switch gyms

Chick I’ve been looking at for a while, basically approached me, gave me her number… we hangout, I make my move, she lets me know there’s a situation she’s healing from..

I tell her to reconsider, and I don’t speak to her the rest of the day. At this point, I know it’s not going to workout.. I basically let it go.

Then she calls me in the evening, so I’m like, it’s on. Then like a fukking pathetic breh I tend to be sometimes, I proceed to text her a sentimental paragraph before I sleep. I got left on delivered brehs

She sees me at the gym today, says hi, I reply back, and ignore her the whole session, and leave without saying goodbye or anything. She then calls me when I get home, we talk a bit, then she proceeds to text me to “check in”, completely ignoring the sappy shyt I sent earlier. I’m confused

Nah you good. Stop all that second guessing noise. You sent that sentimental paragraph cause that's how you authentically feel. None of the charades of playing a character just to impress. If she's gonna act weird cause you kept it 100, then she isn't mature enough to be real with you. The short term thrill of possibly new cheeks may be gone, but you're doing yourself a service if that's how she acts cause it would only cause friction further down the line in other realms...

 

[Formerly Black Trash]

Nah you good. Stop all that second guessing noise. You sent that sentimental paragraph cause that's how you authentically feel. None of the charades of playing a character just to impress. If she's gonna act weird cause you kept it 100, then she isn't mature enough to be real with you. The short term thrill of possibly new cheeks may be gone, but you're doing yourself a service if that's how she acts cause it would only cause friction further down the line in other realms...

Sometimes women just wanna be fukked

 

[DJSmooth]

Man I really couldn’t tell you. She’s adamant that she loves me and thinks I’m a great guy relationship wise. She said Friday that I’m her best friend and it hurts her to do this because there’s nothing wrong with the relationship. Which I already knew because everything is fine outside of her personal struggles.

So back in January we spilt for a week or so but maintained contact because she said she needed to work on herself, which I noticed her mental state deteriorating over last November and December until it all came to a head this January. She scheduled therapy and started that after we started the relationship back like a week later. Since then every facet of our relationship was excellent. Usually I can point to one particular problem or challenge in the relationship but for the first time I’m drawing a blank. Her family likes me and I’ve been over to her family’s place several times for her family events. Just wished her mom a happy Mother’s Day.

Over the last few weeks though she started reverting back to the same behaviors as what I recognized last November and December. Low energy, separating herself socially, low motivation but never necessarily directed at me just in general. Outside of that she was very loving and attentive to me. Hell last weekend we spent all weekend together and had a good time.

I knew something was off cause my gut was telling me something was off but like I said I can’t point to one particular thing in the relationship because truthfully there wasn’t anything. I think that’s the part that leaves a man broken or “sad” because usually there’s SOMETHING that you can point to and say “yeah I see why”. First time in my 40 years of life I can confidently say I don’t know what happened.

Lol it's probably just another nikka.

 

[Ohene]

Lady I've been taking out to various places for dates over the last month.

we have good in person chemistry, last two meet ups this weekend went fantastic.

But when we met up, at the first date this weekend, she insinuated that she thought I was done with her because I didn't text for 2 days straight. I'm not a big text person, I view it as a stager for the in person interaction .


I asked her how much communication she expected and she said everyday.

Is that expected?

Move at your pace

My question is if you’ve been dating for a month how long till she your girlfriend ?

Cause once she’s your girlfriend everyday communication is expected