Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

Ohene

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Lady I've been taking out to various places for dates over the last month.

we have good in person chemistry, last two meet ups this weekend went fantastic.

But when we met up, at the first date this weekend, she insinuated that she thought I was done with her because I didn't text for 2 days straight. I'm not a big text person, I view it as a stager for the in person interaction .


I asked her how much communication she expected and she said everyday.

Is that expected?
Move at your pace

My question is if you’ve been dating for a month how long till she your girlfriend ?

Cause once she’s your girlfriend everyday communication is expected
 

Ohene

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Well the girl that I’ve been seeing since September (talked about her in this thread back in January) broke up with me this past Friday :francis:

Shot my shot at this girl at my gym Saturday. I know her mom (which I didn’t know until I saw the two of them together Saturday talking and they called me over, and her mom loves me). Everything is friendly and enthusiastic during our face to face conversation. I text her later that day, she responds a couple times then I get left on read after asking a direct question about the band she went to go see earlier that day. See her in the gym Sunday and the energy is mad weird but yet she keeps looking at me when we’re in different areas and waved when we made initial eye contact. Text her later to set up something for this weekend, she doesn’t respond for 5 hrs and then when she does she says she has plans for the day I asked about and never offered a counter date. Aka not interested which is stupid cause all she gotta say is she’s seeing someone and I would’ve deaded it. Instead acting autistic comes naturally to these chicks and now it’s awkward cause I’m still cool with her mom.

Say all that to say I’m not looking forward to the dating game again. Shyt is a major drag and time wasting.
It’s definitely a drag but don’t rush back into meeting new hoes if you can help it

Take a breather
 

Ohene

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Man I really couldn’t tell you. She’s adamant that she loves me and thinks I’m a great guy relationship wise. She said Friday that I’m her best friend and it hurts her to do this because there’s nothing wrong with the relationship. Which I already knew because everything is fine outside of her personal struggles.

So back in January we spilt for a week or so but maintained contact because she said she needed to work on herself, which I noticed her mental state deteriorating over last November and December until it all came to a head this January. She scheduled therapy and started that after we started the relationship back like a week later. Since then every facet of our relationship was excellent. Usually I can point to one particular problem or challenge in the relationship but for the first time I’m drawing a blank. Her family likes me and I’ve been over to her family’s place several times for her family events. Just wished her mom a happy Mother’s Day.

Over the last few weeks though she started reverting back to the same behaviors as what I recognized last November and December. Low energy, separating herself socially, low motivation but never necessarily directed at me just in general. Outside of that she was very loving and attentive to me. Hell last weekend we spent all weekend together and had a good time.

I knew something was off cause my gut was telling me something was off but like I said I can’t point to one particular thing in the relationship because truthfully there wasn’t anything. I think that’s the part that leaves a man broken or “sad” because usually there’s SOMETHING that you can point to and say “yeah I see why”. First time in my 40 years of life I can confidently say I don’t know what happened.
We can’t fix broken women breh
It hurts but she doing you a favor long term by self sabotaging
 

Apollo Creed

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Lady I've been taking out to various places for dates over the last month.

we have good in person chemistry, last two meet ups this weekend went fantastic.

But when we met up, at the first date this weekend, she insinuated that she thought I was done with her because I didn't text for 2 days straight. I'm not a big text person, I view it as a stager for the in person interaction .


I asked her how much communication she expected and she said everyday.

Is that expected?
.are y'all having sex?
 

BaggerofTea

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Move at your pace

My question is if you’ve been dating for a month how long till she your girlfriend ?

Cause once she’s your girlfriend everyday communication is expected

Honestly I don't know. Usually a month or two of steady dating and then the conversation of exclusivity comes up and then it takes off from there.

Whats annoying is that she takes hours to get back via text, and women are attached to their phones so I'm not sure if I'm playing out



Or not.


But the in person chemistry feels really good. And she's bad, so I think that is clouding my judgemental as well.
 

BaggerofTea

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Ohhhhh

See that’s different

What’s the delay
I havent felt compelled

Saturday I was over her crib, at her apartment balcony. We had some intimate time, listened to music, shot the shyt on the world and I dipped home.

I didnt feel compelled to have sex with her.


Now I am not a fool :francis: , this chick is fine af and could get dikk on command. We were at a bbq earlier in the day and she was easily the best looking woman there in my opinion.


I think part of it is that majority of the women I have dated, I have been friends starting off with so I am use to a slower burn than most dudes.
 

The ADD

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I havent felt compelled

Saturday I was over her crib, at her apartment balcony. We had some intimate time, listened to music, shot the shyt on the world and I dipped home.

I didnt feel compelled to have sex with her.


Now I am not a fool :francis: , this chick is fine af and could get dikk on command. We were at a bbq earlier in the day and she was easily the best looking woman there in my opinion.


I think part of it is that majority of the women I have dated, I have been friends starting off with so I am use to a slower burn than most dudes.
Limited communication and you aren’t pushing up. She’s probably wondering what the deal is.

Not saying you did anything wrong, just looking at scenarios.
 

Ohene

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No, which is why the communication issue confused me at first.

It's one thing if we were fukking but we haven't even hit that phase yet.

Honestly I don't know. Usually a month or two of steady dating and then the conversation of exclusivity comes up and then it takes off from there.

Whats annoying is that she takes hours to get back via text, and women are attached to their phones so I'm not sure if I'm playing out



Or not.


But the in person chemistry feels really good. And she's bad, so I think that is clouding my judgemental as well.

If she takes long to respond but calling you out for not messaging her daily then shes an hypocrite/idiot lol
 

BaggerofTea

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Limited communication and you aren’t pushing up. She’s probably wondering what the deal is.

Not saying you did anything wrong, just looking at scenarios.

Exactly what she hit me with when we connected Friday

But part of it is that she comes across as always looking for me to initiate the communication
 

Apollo Creed

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No, which is why the communication issue confused me at first.

It's one thing if we were fukking but we haven't even hit that phase yet.

I wouldn't waste energy like that on a woman I haven't slept with. I wouldn't even entertain the bullshyt she on, at this rate she just using you for emotional validation. The only exception to that is if y'all legit on some 50/50 paying for everything and just enjoying time as friends, but if you are funding this shyt you wasting your time.
 

BaggerofTea

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If she takes long to respond but calling you out for not messaging her daily then shes an hypocrite/idiot lol
:francis: then I think that it makes sense that this woman is 37, 4 years older than me, as good looking as she is and hasnt locked down a long term prospect.

She is also Indian by the way. So I know there are some cultural schematics in between all of this as well.
 

BaggerofTea

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I wouldn't waste energy like that on a woman I haven't slept with. I wouldn't even entertain the bullshyt she on, at this rate she just using you for emotional validation. The only exception to that is if y'all legit on some 50/50 paying for everything and just enjoying time as friends, but if you are funding this shyt you wasting your time.
:francis: my ego might need a minute to accept this reality.
 
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