Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[Yup]

that is what's terrifying. i would be lying to everyone of my brothers on here if i told y'all i'm all fukk this bytch and she never had me. there was moments where it was perfect. there was moments where i legit thought i had a ride or die. that shyt is a level of fukked up i cant even comprehend. what if i had had kids with this woman? what if i had married her? in 4 years i never saw a side of her that she decided to just unveil in one night outta the blue. that is terrifying. that shyt makes me never want to trust a bytch again and i would be lying if i said i wasnt legit hurt by that shyt.

we were going on 5 years and i dont even remember what it was like being in the game. thats the hardest part. i gave her everything and in a flash between a couple months ive got nothing to show for it. i cared for her so of course im worried but the anger i feel is way too real. you wasted my motherfukking time. you wasted 4 years of my life and then flipped on me. could it have been worse? absolutely my nikka. she could have been a raggedy ass bytch that went behind my back and i realize that but i can't say this shyt doesn't scar me just as much. she had my defenses completely down and i never saw the shyt coming so i'm going into this completely unprepared. my word of advice to my brothers would be to always keep your guard up even when you're in heaven. ive fukked over women and ive done some dumb some shyt i aint proud of in the past but i was grown by this point. i cant think back and pinpoint a single moment where i could have treated her better because i was mature by this point. and that shyt flipped on me on a dime. these women out here aren't like us regardless of who you dealing with. they can find an unhappy situation no matter what you do. they can decide they're bored no matter what you do.

and the sick shyt about it is i know she's gunna be one of those bytches that turns 30 and panics and locks down some unfortunate nikka who doesn't see it coming. onto the next.

Sounds like legit mental illness. It must hurt to think that you are breakng up with someone you thought youd spend the rest of your life with. Back to square 1....we all are going to go through it the ups and downs of life.

 

[Easy-E]

i understand that and with time i think i will be more emphatic to her situation but right now everything came crashing around me. i brought up the counselling because i wasnt ready to dip for the hills. i wanted to try and fix this with her and she was completely cold. it just caught me off guard and i wish i never went this deep into it. and the fact that i didn't see one sign of it at all just has me buggin.

I definitely understand.

 

[MikelArteta]

that is what's terrifying. i would be lying to everyone of my brothers on here if i told y'all i'm all fukk this bytch and she never had me. there was moments where it was perfect. there was moments where i legit thought i had a ride or die. that shyt is a level of fukked up i cant even comprehend. what if i had had kids with this woman? what if i had married her? in 4 years i never saw a side of her that she decided to just unveil in one night outta the blue. that is terrifying. that shyt makes me never want to trust a bytch again and i would be lying if i said i wasnt legit hurt by that shyt.

we were going on 5 years and i dont even remember what it was like being in the game. thats the hardest part. i gave her everything and in a flash between a couple months ive got nothing to show for it. i cared for her so of course im worried but the anger i feel is way too real. you wasted my motherfukking time. you wasted 4 years of my life and then flipped on me. could it have been worse? absolutely my nikka. she could have been a raggedy ass bytch that went behind my back and i realize that but i can't say this shyt doesn't scar me just as much. she had my defenses completely down and i never saw the shyt coming so i'm going into this completely unprepared. my word of advice to my brothers would be to always keep your guard up even when you're in heaven. ive fukked over women and ive done some dumb some shyt i aint proud of in the past but i was grown by this point. i cant think back and pinpoint a single moment where i could have treated her better because i was mature by this point. and that shyt flipped on me on a dime. these women out here aren't like us regardless of who you dealing with. they can find an unhappy situation no matter what you do. they can decide they're bored no matter what you do.

and the sick shyt about it is i know she's gunna be one of those bytches that turns 30 and panics and locks down some unfortunate nikka who doesn't see it coming. onto the next.

one of the hardest things at a man is trusting or opening up to another chick when one has done you wrong, it messes with your psyche. Your like in the edge of tomorrow and every day is like new relationships all start the same, chicks uttering nice phrases and ish but its like you knwo wha twill happen next but how can you avoid it from not happening. I've had like 11 women tell me they love me, not one is still around. And it kinds of mess me up nside, because if the girl I'm with one day were to tell me she loves me, it would just be like number 12 and thats something I'm working on to blot out the past memories and not let it have a hold on me

And thats the thing with breakups after a long ime, its like getting back on the training wheels, 5 years gone and it may take you months or even years to get to a point where your open to a relationship again, then you gotta start from scratch, dating this and that finding a girl matching up to qualities you desire, hoping it works out etc. etc. so nauseating.

Looking back will just keep you situated in the quick sand, and trust me breh it didn't matter what you did the outcome would have been the same

 

[King Kai]

the landscape of the game changing is the shyt that scares me the most. people wasn't fukking with all this tinder shyt when i got into a relationship with her. i'm going back into a pool where people can make a profile and be fukkin within an hour. the thought of getting into a relationship with anyone in that landscape is disgusting to me smdh. how the fukk you gunna find a good girl when shyt like that is going on?

 

[MikelArteta]

its like I said before sadly but just like I can wake up tomorrow go to work and be in a major car crash and lose my life, same with relationships. I can wake up tomorrow and get a I can't do this anymore text, or some cold icy voice on the other end of the phone. That's why I just try to enjoy the moments, and if it ends at least at peace knowing I've done my best.

 

[MikelArteta]

the landscape of the game changing is the shyt that scares me the most. people wasn't fukking with all this tinder shyt when i got into a relationship with her. i'm going back into a pool where people can make a profile and be fukkin within an hour. the thought of getting into a relationship with anyone in that landscape is disgusting to me smdh. how the fukk you gunna find a good girl when shyt like that is going on?

yeah its hard thats for sure,its like just coming out of a 5 year bid out of prison the whole world and dating landscape is totally different.

I met my current girl online but I got lucky she was just on there for a month trial and went on zero dates, and is religious like me and not even from this filthy west civilization but from africa just came to the west for grad school and now living here permy.

But yeah between instagram, snapchat, facebook, bbm, reg texting, tinder, pof, okcupid, single women have a surplus of simps and dudes warring like gladiators for her attention.

 

[ShadowViper]

one of the hardest things at a man is trusting or opening up to another chick when one has done you wrong, it messes with your psyche. Your like in the edge of tomorrow and every day is like new relationships all start the same, chicks uttering nice phrases and ish but its like you knwo wha twill happen next but how can you avoid it from not happening. I've had like 11 women tell me they love me, not one is still around. And it kinds of mess me up nside, because if the girl I'm with one day were to tell me she loves me, it would just be like number 12 and thats something I'm working on to blot out the past memories and not let it have a hold on me

And thats the thing with breakups after a long ime, its like getting back on the training wheels, 5 years gone and it may take you months or even years to get to a point where your open to a relationship again, then you gotta start from scratch, dating this and that finding a girl matching up to qualities you desire, hoping it works out etc. etc. so nauseating.

Looking back will just keep you situated in the quick sand, and trust me breh it didn't matter what you did the outcome would have been the same

This girl at my job was acting like she wants me asking for my # and constantly flirting only to start seeing some other guy at the job and this Is all after another girl just broke my heart Into pieces. The other fakkot got another job but its still hella awkward between me and her, and seeing her today after not seeing her at work for weeks brought up all sorts of fukked up thoughts. I really needed to hear that bold part cus sh*t has been eating me up all day.

 

[MikelArteta]

This girl at my job was acting like she wants me asking for my # and constantly flirting only to start seeing some other guy at the job and this Is all after another girl just broke my heart Into pieces. The other fakkot got another job but its still hella awkward between me and her, and seeing her today after not seeing her at work for weeks brought up all sorts of fukked up thoughts. I really needed to hear that bold part cus sh*t has been eating me up all day.

I'm telling you man it doesn't matter what you did, if your a womans number 1. You can be dead broke, going nowhere in life, ugly, fat, but if your number 1 in her heart it overlaps every and everything. Its like being 10/5 in baseball gives you veto power literally.

If a woman wants to be with you she will, if she doesn't she won't.

It's literally that simple, ever dealt wiht a woman you didn't care about and did nothing but she stuck to you like glue? and another hcick you treat like a queen royalty but she ain't feeling you like that?

With chick a you are her number 1, chick b you aren't.

I'm not saying treat women horribly but in the end a woman will be with you of her own accord.

Like I said my girl said she wouldn't date a guy who lives with his parents, or a guy shorter than her, or a jamaican that she hates the way I dress, that I have a kid's voice etc. etc.

guess whose she's dating not that 6'2 nigerian accountant nikka with the waterfront condo and barry white voice


Be number 1 brehs, if your not your wasting your damn time

 

[King Kai]

its like I said before sadly but just like I can wake up tomorrow go to work and be in a major car crash and lose my life, same with relationships. I can wake up tomorrow and get a I can't do this anymore text, or some cold icy voice on the other end of the phone. That's why I just try to enjoy the moments, and if it ends at least at peace knowing I've done my best.

breh the hardest part about this is A) i care for her, i feel bad for her and she's going through some fukked up ass shyt. and B) I can't fight that "what if she goes back to normal" message from my conscience. one half of me tells me this chick is never to be trusted again. she flipped on a dime, it will happen again guaren-damn-teed. the other half is like maybe this was just a hard time for her and she'll come back down to earth.

what do y'all do to keep the no contact going? i could use literally any advice because the empathetic half of me wants to see if she's okay and i'm weak right now.

 

[MikelArteta]

breh the hardest part about this is A) i care for her, i feel bad for her and she's going through some fukked up ass shyt. and B) I can't fight that "what if she goes back to normal" message from my conscience. one half of me tells me this chick is never to be trusted again. she flipped on a dime, it will happen again guaren-damn-teed. the other half is like maybe this was just a hard time for her and she'll come back down to earth.

what do y'all do to keep the no contact going? i could use literally any advice because the empathetic half of me wants to see if she's okay and i'm weak right now.

None of us are light switches that can just turn on or off. However for the most part in life people can only fix themselves because only they truly know what they are battling with.

Yes you care for her and maybe you always will, but you have to think about yourself as well, there is no better time than to be selfish than after a breakup.

I say worry about what if she goes back to normal when that time comes, and secondly this may be her so to speak new normal. People are always changing and evolving especially women. This may be who she will be till she dies.

No contact is to kill the emotional bonds, its just like wheening off a drug or any addiction. By going no contact ala not talking, texting, checking her social media day by day the emotional connection dies a little bit and its the quickest way to recover, however its so easy to fall into weakness and check up on her, check her instagram, send a text, etc. then you feel good for a little bit then right back in the gutter.

She's a grown adult she's fine, and if she wasn't she knows your numbre and so does her family. The weakness is normal in the first days/weeks

This was someone you talked to for years and years, saw like every day. Its kind of like waking up at 11am every day for 5 years, then suddenly you get a job that starts at 8am, its going to be a struggle for awhile to wake up at like 6am because you were so used to the routine

 

[sfgiants]

@Emperor_ReinScarf was right when a girl is into you, you can be a total ass and she wont care. just told this chick i had diarrhea and shes like omg and started sending me cures and keeps checking in on me
also, unrelated good looks on this apple cider vinegar shyt man i think u mentioned castor oil too. the coli as a site is truly goat

 

[King Kai]

None of us are light switches that can just turn on or off. However for the most part in life people can only fix themselves because only they truly know what they are battling with.

Yes you care for her and maybe you always will, but you have to think about yourself as well, there is no better time than to be selfish than after a breakup.

I say worry about what if she goes back to normal when that time comes, and secondly this may be her so to speak new normal. People are always changing and evolving especially women. This may be who she will be till she dies.

No contact is to kill the emotional bonds, its just like wheening off a drug or any addiction. By going no contact ala not talking, texting, checking her social media day by day the emotional connection dies a little bit and its the quickest way to recover, however its so easy to fall into weakness and check up on her, check her instagram, send a text, etc. then you feel good for a little bit then right back in the gutter.

She's a grown adult she's fine, and if she wasn't she knows your numbre and so does her family. The weakness is normal in the first days/weeks

This was someone you talked to for years and years, saw like every day. Its kind of like waking up at 11am every day for 5 years, then suddenly you get a job that starts at 8am, its going to be a struggle for awhile to wake up at like 6am because you were so used to the routine

breh got me with the analogies

but i need to hear this shyt

 

[kevm3]

You should never base your life around women or make them the center jewel of your life. You simply don't know what they will do next. It's sad that it has to be that way, but that's just the reality of it all. Enjoy them while they are here, but be prepared for them to walk at any moment.

 

[<<TheStandard>>]

alright i'ma give y'all the low down cause i can relate to alot of what's being said here and i would definitely appreciate some perspective

we were together for 4 and a half years and we just mutually decided to call it quits. it wasn't perfect but those first 4 years were the best relationship i've ever had. couldn't keep our hands off each other. the "honeymoon" phase went damn near 2 years then slowed down a bit for the next 2 but we was still happy and finishing eachothers sentences and all that other cornball shyt. where we clicked on the most was the fact that neither of us really went too hard with the party lifestyle. i drank with my boys every game night and the only bar hopping we did was with some close friends just chillin. it was a routine at this point but all was well and happy.

cut to the 4 year mark. i get a job i've been scratching and clawing for for damn near the last 3 years. i'm on cloud 9 at this point. i got my pay raise with a respectable job, i'm the best shape of my life, i got my woman by my side and the pieces are coming together. at this point, she flips like i've never seen before. anxiety. turns out this shyt runs in her family all the way up. gradually over a period 6 months she does a complete 180. she's down all the damn time. she can't even hold up a conversation anymore. completely apathetic. the anxiety shyt would have been a massive red flag for me but it never came up in those 4 years then outta nowhere this shyt hits. i cant emphasis that shyt enough fam. not one sign of it. i even got a call from one of her parents telling me they think she's hitting depression. naturally we start fightin more because its miserable any time we're in the same room. she even acknowledges to me that she knows it's coming completely from her end and says "she can't help it." she says the people at work dont appreciate her and that stress is getting her down and starts listing off a bunch of shyt that sounds like she's just making shyt up on my end etc etc.

by this point i already see the blood in the water and i would say for about 4 months already subconsciously started planning my exit. it was some shyt i've never seen before in my life. i saw her every damn day for 4 years and knew her inside and out and she flipped on a dime into a person i've never ever seen before. naturally the more speculative brothers would probably think maybe another dude would cause her to act this way. i already explored all those avenues before breaking up with her and it wasn't just me she was like this around. everyone. family. coworkers. when she smiled, anybody that knew her knew it was fake. it was beyond sad. even the friends from her side were telling me she was different. didn't sleep for a whole night thinking about this shyt and just approached her the next morning. i said i wasn't doing this anymore and that i was amazed at how fast shyt flipped in the last 4 months. she says it's all her fault and doesn't blame me for leaving but that she hasn't been happy with our relationship either and accepts it. now i've dealt with my fair share of completely crazy bytches in my life, and this definitely turned out to be one of em, but you wouldn't believe the switch here fam. we fought like normal couples do but we were happy and she was good to me and i was good to her. i never dealt with any bullshyt from her end in my time with her and naturally that made me go all out for her. flipped over night. completely different person.

i would love an outlook from my older more experienced brothers. i've got a feelin this bytch is seriously gunna hinder my ability to ever put my faith in a woman again.

and the shyt that bugs me out the most is i got my life figured out. i been waiting on this job for years. i hit the gym like never before in the last year and was feelin myself. shape of my life. everything came together and then she flipped.

Jesus Christ......That's what actually scares me about longterm relationships.

I've had women flip on me after a few months, after a year but after 4 years is scary...

That's why the concept of marriage is a bit insane to me. You make lifetime decisions based on a very short phase of your life.

I wish you the best breh

 

[MikelArteta]

When a woman is into you, you can grt away with anything. Not saying to be a a$$hole or jerk, but even if you are she will still be around.

@Emperor_ReinScarf was right when a girl is into you, you can be a total ass and she wont care. just told this chick i had diarrhea and shes like omg and started sending me cures and keeps checking in on me
also, unrelated good looks on this apple cider vinegar shyt man i think u mentioned castor oil too. the coli as a site is truly goat