Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women
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Cape Town JHB
All Star
I'm so glad we are on the same page
Damn breh I thought I'd been relegated to CAC PUAs status
Cape Town JHB
All Star
The point that I tried to make and got horribly off the mark in my wording was that the majority of the young broads aged 18-24 are undercover Bears posing as ponies/deers for the sake of social mobility. Most of them respond to the Bear hunting approach much better. The best part is that the Bear approach weeds out time wasters. There's no much chasing or prolonged dates etc
it's just that being an unapologetic hunter in today's social climate is so rare and frowned upon that I think most younger cats will be turned off by it or even when stated by the brilliant Patrice they'd still be too scared of social judgement to pull it off.
But u really urge younger cats to go beyond being direct and be brutally honest and just watch the responses with no fear of rejection.
I was also saying a lot of the advice here is geared towards Deer/pony hunting, whereas young broads today are so full of shyt/opinionated/feminist etc etc that there indeed Bears.
Sorry about my CAC sounding rant/post earlier
what @Cape Town JHB said makes sense. i would just take out the blatantly disrespectful parts of it and replace it with something unusual but less shocking.
"are you from around here or just screwing around with someone here?"
"are you from around here or just dating someone?"
"how many guys have cheated on you....that you know about?" - i said this to a girl on a date one time. and she started crying. called me an ass. but somehow still went home with me that night.
"are you from around here or just screwing around with someone here?"
"are you from around here or just dating someone?"
"how many guys have cheated on you....that you know about?" - i said this to a girl on a date one time. and she started crying. called me an ass. but somehow still went home with me that night.
Cape Town JHB
All Star
please tell these brehs. It's not about the disrespectful part or even getting them railed up emotionally. it's making her mad, laugh, think, get mad and laugh again. Patrice O'Neil said the fact that you can show her how easily you can control their emotions without it affecting you, drives them crazy. They love and hate you all at once. I wish my Coli brehs were more open and thought about this deeply coz it is very very nuanced
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calixprynce
...
Was pulling out the apts at midnite and seen my ex gettin out the car with a nikka . The look on her face when she seen me laughing 
Desperate for dikk, bringin nikkas to a dirty ass house ... #FAB #HOH
these hoes just wanna be taken care off, lil hoe was just on my line begging for me to pay her credit card bill and buy her some weed.
Desperate for dikk, bringin nikkas to a dirty ass house ... #FAB #HOH
these hoes just wanna be taken care off, lil hoe was just on my line begging for me to pay her credit card bill and buy her some weed.
I was thinking about that "No More Mr. Nice Guy" and I was thinking about some stuff in my family. My mother is a NOTORIOUS people pleaser and although I'm one of the backbones in the family I had to put my foot down eventually with her trying to use me to please everyone.
It's just a learned ability. A lot of the women in my family will call each other out, say very personal and hurtful things, and they let it blow over. My mom's side of the family does that and is mostly female dominated. My uncle hardly deals with them, eventually moved out of Atlanta to Florida. I'm in Texas for my career but I'm more involved with all the women in my family, communicate with them, etc. He's sorta fed up with them.
Anyways my biological father was abusive to my mother, my grandfather was an absent alcoholic, and my aunt never fostered a positive male relationship so of course that framed how I would develop as a man around them. I'm still learning on how to set boundaries with them all whilst being loving and caring. Even moreso since my stepfather died there is a HUGE void in the family. My stepfather's side has a good mix of men and women which is good.
So yeah I could see some of my past people pleasing affected me in relationships or fostering relationships. I was listening to an "Art Of Charm" Podcast and it had some good gems and reiterated some things I heard years ago from listening to "No More Mr. Nice Guy". When dealing with women you don't have to be an a$$hole, but one has to be assertive, confident, and set boundaries when needed. I don't see a problem with being a good listener and empathetic, but of course the older I get I realize you have to be ruthless with your time and who/what/where you spend it.
It's just a learned ability. A lot of the women in my family will call each other out, say very personal and hurtful things, and they let it blow over. My mom's side of the family does that and is mostly female dominated. My uncle hardly deals with them, eventually moved out of Atlanta to Florida. I'm in Texas for my career but I'm more involved with all the women in my family, communicate with them, etc. He's sorta fed up with them.
Anyways my biological father was abusive to my mother, my grandfather was an absent alcoholic, and my aunt never fostered a positive male relationship so of course that framed how I would develop as a man around them. I'm still learning on how to set boundaries with them all whilst being loving and caring. Even moreso since my stepfather died there is a HUGE void in the family. My stepfather's side has a good mix of men and women which is good.
So yeah I could see some of my past people pleasing affected me in relationships or fostering relationships. I was listening to an "Art Of Charm" Podcast and it had some good gems and reiterated some things I heard years ago from listening to "No More Mr. Nice Guy". When dealing with women you don't have to be an a$$hole, but one has to be assertive, confident, and set boundaries when needed. I don't see a problem with being a good listener and empathetic, but of course the older I get I realize you have to be ruthless with your time and who/what/where you spend it.
Cape Town JHB
All Star
Rage. You need to reach your breaking point. I can sense you ate not angry enough. I come from a very disfunctionall family too. I consider any famIly where the people/"grown ups" are not helpingor creating a conducive ensure the dormant potential and growth of a child develop to be dysfunctional.
In the long term relationships you've had with women what has been the relationship dynamic? Did you go out of your way to please the girl you were with, could she manipulate you emotionally and did you let it happen? Are you assertive? I ask all this because typically most guys who come from such a family dynamic with dysfunctional women tend to be very prone to female emotional mainimputation. subconsciously you find yourself very attached to a melodramatic prototype female as this is the only way you feel at "home". Often a guy who comes from this dynamic will self destruct a relationship with a "good girl" because he can't wrap his head around a female loving him and wanting the best for him.
Lastly what your uncle did is what I did. Excommunicating destructive negative people from your immediate social circles is crucial whether it's family, colleagues, childhood friends or spouses. It doesn't matter. Often it's better to find hobbies that you're really passionate about to replace there emotional crutches and feelings of lonliness. example I have a guy that we just debate sport with coz I'm a big rugby fan. our interactions and "friendship" is almost exclusively centred around Rugby and it's great coz he loves it as much as I do. I'm also a big Funk,Jazz , Soul, Neo Soul and hip hop before it got whack so I have "friends" that bounded to solely by our lor and passionate for for music, I'm also big on comedy so I go out and meet similar people. This is how you'll great detached from your dysfunctional family by finding passions and hobbies and using those as social circle builders.
I think since my father died I've been playing a larger role in the family. My aunt and grandmother mean a lot to me but they can cause division in the family. They have done it to my uncle and somewhat to my mother now because they have been saying things about my father and trying to draw her back into their negative behavior. My mother is the LEAST dysfunctional out of them if anything. She believed people pleasing for a while would make things "OK" but it didn't with dealing with those two. I love my grandma and aunt but they are miserable people at times and they trickle that down to the behavior of others.
If I was still living there I would have to deal with their BS. Since I live states over I can limit my time. I'm trying to help my sister through everything right now and in my father's absence I've become stronger for my mother and sister. I can also see they respect me for that.
As far as relationships, dating, etc I think I'm assertive. My last ex was VERY emotionally manipulative and used the same tactics that the women use in my family, emotional blackmail / guilt trips. I can see that shyt from a mile away now. I think my ex made me 'feel' bad about certain situations and I think No More Mr Nice Guy talks about certain things the Nice Guy suppresses as their needs. I've been learning more the past few years how to get my needs met.
I think in dating sometimes I've had to date women or liked women that validated me a bit, but I realize that is a bit silly and toned it down. You have to understand though for a good bit of my life I was an only child and I was coddled quite a bit. I think I'm a better man now though having setbacks in life and having to work through them on my own.
I have my passions. I shoot, do martial arts, lift weights. I still value companionship a lot. I think I can take rejection extremely personally and I can be thin skinned at times so I try and work on that as well.
Cape Town JHB
All Star
Aunt, mom, grandma etc. You have too big of a connection to OLD bitter females. You just said that you had to step up for your sister after your dad died and now you said that you can tell they respect you for that as if that means anything. Why does them respecting you even matter ? Let me ask you this:
What is your biggest fear if you excommunicated all of them. created a list of all your family members weighed what value they add to your life and decided to cut off all contact including deleting all social media contact. What would it take to make such a drastic move.
Respecting is that they respect my boundaries as a person which fosters healthy relationships. My mother and sister. Sister is young so she is innocent, has high respect for me and I have to be there for her. My mother respects me but is a helicopter mom I just try and manager her. It's really my aunt and grandma that will cross the line and honestly I'm starting to do less and less with them. Not in a malicious manner but I have to satisfy my own needs and interests.
I know what I want out of a healthy relationship and go from there.
Also with my grandma and aunt they can't really do or say much to me at this phase of my life TBH. I see what you mean though if I was still in that environment with them.
Rev Leon Lonnie Love
damned mine eyes, DAMNED mine eyes!!
a lot of older cats in this thread are giving solid game with old school application. Times have changed and a lot of what is said in these posts work for the older cats because they've mastered their Game over decades.
Heres some game for ALL guys dealing wuth girls/women born '94-2000 (18-24
Year olds). Bad ass women in this category need a slightly different approach. Example the world we live in today is completely p*ssy whipped. White Nerd Culture is the mainstream norm. Being a geeky slightly socially always always agree with everything and everyone is considered normal. the young women are product of all this. If you want the most effective and NON TIME CONSUMING way to get at younger broads use the SHOCK TREATMENT.
Meaning you have to announce your manhood and masculinity so unabashadly and unapologetically on the first meeting,matter of fact the first 10seconds of talking to her. Stop doing the small talk, where you from, what do you do etc e.g. Example when you see a 20something year old broad on campus or the mall you ask her something typical and then switch. Example "do you live around here or you fukking someone in the area?"
Her response is gonna be typical emotional drivel and social shaming "excuse me ? Dont fukking talk to me like that ? What did you just say ? ..... what the he'll is wrong with you Blah blah blah "
Your response again without hesitation or hint of GiveAfukk "I said DO YOU LIVE AROUND THIS AREA OR ARE YOU fukkING SOMEONE AROUND HERE ?"
let the awkwardness and general hostility fester and not be phased by it. Then when she's at her peak of being pissed and angry at you, tell her "a girl like you is way too cute to not be finking somebody...look at your body, nice ass, not too big but firm, your boobs are telling gravity it doesn't exist and you got a pretty face. Not many girls have the combination of a sexy body and a pretty face
....how old are you?
"
At this point if she answers or engages your questions in at way you've already won the battle. if you wanna take it a step further you stop her before she tells you. Grab her hand , squeeze as if you're assessing it , lift it up and even TELL her to turn around whilst still looking at her like some new toy or gadget that you're assessing. Then give your answer "definitely older than 21 coz your boobs are lil bit saggy but not much; but everything else is fine as fukk, Id say older than 21 but younger than 26. Am I right? "
Again you do the criticsisng and complimenting of her body very dismissively followed by a compliment and then a question. The question part is crucial coz if she answers and continues to engage in the conversation she is not only intrigued by you , her remaining in conversation with you is subconsciously a form of submission. She's allowing you to talk to her like crazy , assert your standards on her , criticise and grade her like a piece of meat and command her body , all this goes straight to her primal impulses. She's socially conditioned in a p*ssy whipped environment and you're giving her RAW uncut manhood straight to the vein and she doesn't understand why she likes it so much and why she's still standing there listening to this "ass hole".
Also another crucial element to add is to ask her questions that only cute bytch would have deep insight in. E.g. Do you think the guys who cheated on you did it coz theyou found a cuter girl than you or did they cheat because they found a girl who was just as good looking as you but wasn't full of shyt. Meaning she looked like you but didn't nag or complain, she sacked good dikk, cooked and cleaned etc "?
lastly if we went out what would you do that typical girls don't do.?
No matter what her answer is tell her okay. I tell you want ima take you out on this day and but only on one .......I want you to make a list of 5 questions that you want me to answer honestly. That's my condition.
Doing shyt like that separates from the Pack. How many cats tell a bytch to write a list of questions for a date after offending the shyt outta her.
I can get much much deeper into all of this for those interested
Aagain this is specifically for young broads between 18-24. The reason it works best on them is because at that age not only are at their peak of their beauty they also think it's gonna last forever. They are very used to having men bow down to them. A lot of guys try to buy (tricks) them out. They are still searching for a man they can FEEL. They want the FEELING of a real man. Most guys they talk to are just so blown away their looks that they succumb to all her bullshyt and innately she's repulsed by these guys. By doing the extreme opposite and asserting yourselves beyond any social conditioning you are separating from no only her but even guy that tries to get with her.
lastly ALL of this takes BALLS. Ifor you're scared to be embarrassed or whatever then don't even bother. You need nerves of steel to pull this off.
Peace from South Africa brehs
You in JHB or CPT?
Cape Town JHB
All Star
Both. Born and raised in Cape Town. lived in Johannesburg for a minute.
Cape Town JHB
All Star
Thanks breh. It took me 10 years to even be comfortable and confident enough to be able to pull it off consisitently. Just reading books like Predatory Female ain't enough. Listening to Patrice O'Neil etc is crucial but ain't enough. You quite literally need to have interactions with an array of females who are full of shyt and conquer them(College party girls, college needy girls, black femisinists, working class girls, spoilt rich girls, lower inome hot chicks vs upper income hot chicks, late bloomers, cute bytchs with small t*ts, thick girls with no ass, dark complexion beautiful girls who were conditioned to hate themselves, entitled light skin girls, passive aggressive white bytchs, white identified mutatoes, single older women or women with kids, women who are bosses or top managers at their jobs, the snobby artists wannabe "deep" Erykah Badu types, the legit daddy-issues crazy men-hating broads, chicks who were raped/molested etc etc etc years upon years bruh.
Having mentors, theoretical psychology and real life experiences is crucial. The real life experiment part takes years .
Interstigly a lot if not all white guys that got into whitewashed saturated Game what they call "PUA"(Pick Up Artist) got into it not coz of loving women , liking bagging beautiful chicks, not a fascination with psychology or anything organic like most black guys who find themselves struggling with women.
Most CACs get into that Pick Up Artist shyt coz they hate white women and feel emasculated in their own white socio-sexual circles. They are usually nerdy or bang average looking, socially akwakrd guys who still have a complex due to being rejected by pretty white women all their lives. They use Pick Up Artistry as a replacement for their manhood and also as some type of "revenge of the nerds" type mentality. Thus most of them have these "set" ways of doing things that have no philosophy behind it. "If she says this is you say that, wait at least 3 days before contacting her again, if she calls let the phone ring for at least 10 seconds before you answer etc" ...you can actually pick the phone up as soon at rings and say " Girl I told you to always text me before calling, I'm busy right now. Text me later before you call again" and drop the phone. This showing her you value your time, don't take shyt (assertive) and are not scared of losing her all in one.
The cac PUA would never ever ever think of doing something like that coz what they call Game is based on copy pasting what they think Game is supposed to be. They are acting out what a real confident man does organically after years of social practice.
They even teach people body language/posture, how to project confidence, now if you got Game the body language is usually subconscious and you project confidence without even having to think about it. But again most of them are not interested in Game and tend to go from Pick Artist to conservistism/alt right to full blown white supremacist.
The whole time their feelings of emasculation are steeped in racist anti black men vitriolic sentiments that they project on white women coz no matter what they do they feel like they can never be as "cool"(manly) as a black male. it's very deep stuff.
Champagne Sharks Podcast (hosted by Trevor ) broke it down way better than me CS071: Listener Question: The PUA/MRA to White Nationalist Pipeline (03/03/2018)
, Lowkey the best new black male Podcast out there right now)
Thanks for the rep and I really wanna hear your thoughts once you've listed to CS Podcasts.
Peace from South Africa.
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