Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[WIA20XX]

nah
he said he moved in with her and she was paying the rent
he said he told her to pay for the 4th date or whatever

that aint leading with your wallet lol

That makes it worse.

She was holding him down, paying everything.

You think she wanted to do that?
You think that was 100% out of the goodness of her heart, like she didn't have reasonable expectations that this would get repaid?

That's normal behavior for anyone, and it's specifically female behavior on top of that.

If he was on some 50/50 from jump, I'd understand.
If he had kept accurate records and paid her back (with market rate interest) - she would know what time it was.
She essentially gave him a loan.

He let his woman take the financial lead for household expenses.

It was all love back then.

Now that he's making a bit more coin and he's in a BETTER position to provide for a family..,, now he's moving funny?

Make it make sense!

 

[Ohene]

That makes it worse.

She was holding him down, paying everything.

You think she wanted to do that?
You think that was 100% out of the goodness of her heart, like she didn't have reasonable expectations that this would get repaid?

That's normal behavior for anyone, and it's specifically female behavior on top of that.

If he was on some 50/50 from jump, I'd understand.
If he had kept accurate records and paid her back (with market rate interest) - she would know what time it was.
She essentially gave him a loan.

He let his woman take the financial lead for household expenses.

It was all love back then.

Now that he's making a bit more coin and he's in a BETTER position to provide for a family..,, now he's moving funny?

Make it make sense!

contradicting yourself... buying a nice ring and shoes as gifts years into the relationship is on the backend. how is that LEADING with your wallet...leading implies it was at the beginning.

nobody entitled to another person taking care of them. simple as that.

and if he marrying the broad and everything between them supposed to be shared then who cares whos paying for what unless you tryna stockpile resources for when you leave the relationship. the time will come where she pop out a seed and then itll be him holding it down. its a team effort. shyt aint that complicated. homie need to ditch her ...no room for that bullshyt in the relationship and its clear there are irreperable flaws in their dynamic

 

[Ohene]

his girl ungrateful and cant see the big picture. that's crab in the bucket shyt. your nikka gets a promotion at work, and celebrates partially by buying you a nice engagement ring and an expensive christmas gift and instead of just going with the flow because its better for the household at large...you tryna extort him for more rent money?

it aint like he making an extra 50K. its an extra 9K after tax probably in NYC where the rent prolly like $3000+ a month. that shyt is wack. i wish a girl would try that with me, it'd be over with.

 

[Ohene]

i can understand why some traditionalists dont even believe in living together before marriage
and i definitely would never move in with a chick

 

[WIA20XX]

contradicting yourself... buying a nice ring and shoes as gifts years into the relationship is on the backend. how is that LEADING with your wallet...leading implies it was at the beginning.

Ol boy came in as a hobosexual.
She was cool with that.
Lotta females have zero problems paying the majority of the bills.

But they run the house in that situation.

Then he started to come up financially
Then he started with the gifts.
Then he popped the question.

Then he started making more. Now they're making 50/50 on the money side.

So he's changed up from being a pimp to a square.

Now that he's in a better financial position, he wants 50/50, when they're no longer 50/50 in terms of income.

He basically profited from her kindness this whole time.
And he made moves that he was trying to be a provider, he's saying naw.

He's saying thanks for giving me a home and paying the bills while I make this bread.

But my money is my money, even though I'm in a better position to fund OUR lifestyle.

I wasn't saying all that when you were stepping up and holding me down, but I'm saying it now.

This is just wrong on the financials.

But also we know what general female nature is.

We know what women are like.
We know what they expect.

And cats acting brand new thinking that this was just gonna go down without any push back.

nobody entitled to another person taking care of them. simple as that.

She should get some get back, at the least, at the very least.

If we were to rewind the clock, knowing this

She should have not let him move in with her.
She should not have come out of pocket.

and if he marrying the broad and everything between them supposed to be shared then who cares whos paying for what unless you tryna stockpile resources for when you leave the relationship. the time will come where she pop out a seed and then itll be him holding it down. its a team effort. shyt aint that complicated. homie need to ditch her ...no room for that bullshyt in the relationship and its clear there are irreperable flaws in their dynamic

She needs to drop him, if he's not willing to see the totality of things, and is focused on the here and now.

In both cases, we agree that they should break up

Where he disagree is that you take his side, and I take her side.

 

[RealCrownHeights]

That makes it worse.

She was holding him down, paying everything.

You think she wanted to do that?
You think that was 100% out of the goodness of her heart, like she didn't have reasonable expectations that this would get repaid?

That's normal behavior for anyone, and it's specifically female behavior on top of that.

If he was on some 50/50 from jump, I'd understand.
If he had kept accurate records and paid her back (with market rate interest) - she would know what time it was.
She essentially gave him a loan.

He let his woman take the financial lead for household expenses.

It was all love back then.

Now that he's making a bit more coin and he's in a BETTER position to provide for a family..,, now he's moving funny?

Make it make sense!

She was never holding me down and paying for anything lmao. While dating and without living together, the split was 70/40. I obviously could care less about eating at multiple restaurants and going on dates. When I eat out alone, my bill is like $60. To go on a date in NYC is like 150 minimum. And when we first dated I made significantly less money and so did she. I was unemployed and we still went on dates, but not as much. She was laid off, I fixed up her resume etc.

I was always on 50/50. She said she wasn't but then I said thee's no way i can afford 100. I'm not rich.

Did you even read what I said?

 

[RealCrownHeights]

Ol boy came in as a hobosexual.
She was cool with that.
Lotta females have zero problems paying the majority of the bills.

But they run the house in that situation.

Then he started to come up financially
Then he started with the gifts.
Then he popped the question.

Then he started making more. Now they're making 50/50 on the money side.

So he's changed up from being a pimp to a square.

Now that he's in a better financial position, he wants 50/50, when they're no longer 50/50 in terms of income.

He basically profited from her kindness this whole time.
And he made moves that he was trying to be a provider, he's saying naw.

He's saying thanks for giving me a home and paying the bills while I make this bread.

But my money is my money, even though I'm in a better position to fund OUR lifestyle.

I wasn't saying all that when you were stepping up and holding me down, but I'm saying it now.

This is just wrong on the financials.

But also we know what general female nature is.

We know what women are like.
We know what they expect.

And cats acting brand new thinking that this was just gonna go down without any push back.




She should get some get back, at the least, at the very least.

If we were to rewind the clock, knowing this

She should have not let him move in with her.
She should not have come out of pocket.



She needs to drop him, if he's not willing to see the totality of things, and is focused on the here and now.

In both cases, we agree that they should break up

Where he disagree is that you take his side, and I take her side.

I think you are writing just to write. We both lived in separate areas. My rent elsewhere was actually cheaper. She got laid off and we planned on moving to marriage so I moved in. How much money she's saved from me moving in and going 50/50 remains to be seen but she has like 2 years of extra savings now.

 

[Ohene]

Ol boy came in as a hobosexual.
She was cool with that.
Lotta females have zero problems paying the majority of the bills.

But they run the house in that situation.

Then he started to come up financially
Then he started with the gifts.
Then he popped the question.

Then he started making more. Now they're making 50/50 on the money side.

So he's changed up from being a pimp to a square.

Now that he's in a better financial position, he wants 50/50, when they're no longer 50/50 in terms of income.

He basically profited from her kindness this whole time.
And he made moves that he was trying to be a provider, he's saying naw.

He's saying thanks for giving me a home and paying the bills while I make this bread.

But my money is my money, even though I'm in a better position to fund OUR lifestyle.

I wasn't saying all that when you were stepping up and holding me down, but I'm saying it now.

This is just wrong on the financials.

But also we know what general female nature is.

We know what women are like.
We know what they expect.

And cats acting brand new thinking that this was just gonna go down without any push back.




She should get some get back, at the least, at the very least.

If we were to rewind the clock, knowing this

She should have not let him move in with her.
She should not have come out of pocket.



She needs to drop him, if he's not willing to see the totality of things, and is focused on the here and now.

In both cases, we agree that they should break up

Where he disagree is that you take his side, and I take her side.

he moved in with her to help subsidize her costs after she got laid off breh.

i aint really taking anyone side

I just know that if a girl started trying to extort me just because i got a 15% raise I'd be done with her and I'm pretty sure you'd be too

 

[RealCrownHeights]

his girl ungrateful and cant see the big picture. that's crab in the bucket shyt. your nikka gets a promotion at work, and celebrates partially by buying you a nice engagement ring and an expensive christmas gift and instead of just going with the flow because its better for the household at large...you tryna extort him for more rent money?

it aint like he making an extra 50K. its an extra 9K after tax probably in NYC where the rent prolly like $3000+ a month. that shyt is wack. i wish a girl would try that with me, it'd be over with.

My mother and aunt were heated about that and basically asked me if this is what I really want.

 

[Ohene]

My mother and aunt were heated about that and basically asked me if this is what I really want.

Your mom a real one. My mom would feel the same way cause she know how these young bytches move. Your girl trying you. Dont fall for it

Worst part is even if you "pass" the test she still gonna harbor some resentment so theres a good chance its over with long term

 

[WIA20XX]

She was never holding me down and paying for anything lmao. While dating and without living together, the split was 70/40. I obviously could care less about eating at multiple restaurants and going on dates. When I eat out alone, my bill is like $60. To go on a date in NYC is like 150 minimum. And when we first dated I made significantly less money and so did she. I was unemployed and we still went on dates, but not as much. She was laid off, I fixed up her resume etc.

I was always on 50/50. She said she wasn't but then I said thee's no way i can afford 100. I'm not rich.

Did you even read what I said?

My mistake, I misread this and all the other posts you've made about your situation.

So please make it clear.

Which one is it?

50/50 or 70/40? (70/40 don't even add up to 100....)

It really doesn't make sense for you to be with this chick if this his how you're gonna approach the finances.

 

[Ohene]

lol at 70/40

 

[WIA20XX]

lol at 70/40

I wanna apologize to you for my misreading his scenario...

But now that I have clarity, it makes even less sense.

*He was always dealing with someone that was selfish and less financially able.

Why he mad now that she's being who she's always been, especially that he's proposed?

 

[Canon]

So, my fiancee makes 97k, I made 98k until this month where I got a raise at 115k. We live together, and we split bills everything etc about 50/50 and we are in NYC. She told me she wants me to pay more rent now that I got a raise, we got into a big argument and she said she's tired of us being roomates etc.and I said I wasn't paying more. For context, she got laid off and I moved in with her before she got a new job, she lived and paid the rent for a year and a half alone by herself. I proposed a week before Christmas, (very expensive ring) and bought her bottega venetta sneakers for christmas etc. everything ceased, she's been the nicest and receptive like I've ever seen after that. Until tonight, where I said I don't want to be a provider and pay for everything. I said if I made $250 or $350k and she made $100k or $80k etc I would pay all but we are not that far apart right now. She got mad all over again, I just camre back from the bar. I asked what do provider men get in return and she mentioned cooking and cleaning, which I do already, and I don't think that's an equal exchange. I said I would be a contributor and we can help each other. I was upfront from the beginning after the 4th date way back then, I said umm are you gonna pay for this one? and she said she should have never paid it that time. Idk what world she thinks she's lviing in or what type of fantasty land she lives in, but I'm not going for this. When I marry her, I inherit her massive student loans, and like I said i just bout expensive ass ring and designer sneakers and I have to pay for a wedding that I rather just sign the doucment for. Am I tripping right now or what?

that tik tok/social media relationship bullshyt is in her ear

good luck breh

 

[skyrunner1]

So, my fiancee makes 97k, I made 98k until this month where I got a raise at 115k. We live together, and we split bills everything etc about 50/50 and we are in NYC. She told me she wants me to pay more rent now that I got a raise, we got into a big argument and she said she's tired of us being roomates etc.and I said I wasn't paying more. For context, she got laid off and I moved in with her before she got a new job, she lived and paid the rent for a year and a half alone by herself. I proposed a week before Christmas, (very expensive ring) and bought her bottega venetta sneakers for christmas etc. everything ceased, she's been the nicest and receptive like I've ever seen after that. Until tonight, where I said I don't want to be a provider and pay for everything. I said if I made $250 or $350k and she made $100k or $80k etc I would pay all but we are not that far apart right now. She got mad all over again, I just camre back from the bar. I asked what do provider men get in return and she mentioned cooking and cleaning, which I do already, and I don't think that's an equal exchange. I said I would be a contributor and we can help each other. I was upfront from the beginning after the 4th date way back then, I said umm are you gonna pay for this one? and she said she should have never paid it that time. Idk what world she thinks she's lviing in or what type of fantasty land she lives in, but I'm not going for this. When I marry her, I inherit her massive student loans, and like I said i just bout expensive ass ring and designer sneakers and I have to pay for a wedding that I rather just sign the doucment for. Am I tripping right now or what?

Algorithm got yo bytch.. You better off telling her lets take a social media break for new years.. Good luck