Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[kevm3]

Real talk, never ruin what you have with your patnas over these women. Sooner or later, these women expose themselves and you will look back on a ruined relationship with your homies like, "Man, I was tripping." You'll have lost a life-long comrade and that seemingly perfect woman will be on to the next man.

 

[BreezyH]

The sooner you all realize that the game is severely fukked up is the sooner the game gets easier.

There was a time when we could take the p*ssy. Why did we stop doing that? Seriously, why?

There was a time when we could beat our wives because they deserve to get flexed on. But that has stopped. Again, I ask, why?

We have held the power...and we continue to hold the power. What man decided to make it such a taboo to take the p*ssy and to beat the p*ssy if it deserves it?

I am more than curious of such a scenario. Now, look at this, a humongous thread on playing games with inferior people. You have GOT, to be kidding me. Are we not men? Do we not have the superior muscle? Are we not the maker and owner of weapons? Are we not the more logical thinkers? Have we not been the forefront creating everything that actually matters?

Why is it that man subjects upon himself undesirable circumstances?

Is the behavior of modern women, deserving of our unwavering gratitude? Are you attempting to be comedic?

I'll tell you a few things, modern woman is resisting a system that has worked since the beginning of man. The weaker sex, the child bearers, the one that submits to man, the cooker, cleaner the humble one. Why not, after all? They are inferior.

Instantly thought of this




with that said, i think it's best to have a willing partner in everything so can't cosign the "take it approach"

 

[Momentum]

Going out with her could end a good friendship I have with her exs brothers. I know she and I can hold convos because we have in the past. She's not an unknown for me we met 5 years ago and I have been around her enough to know she's a good person. She's pretty much a sure thing knowing what I know of her and how we get a long.


I'll give her a few months even though she's going to be at my nephews birthday party this weekend.

You sound too worried about "what if's" that don't even matter. Those dudes would not spare your feelings if it was the other way around.

 

[Atlrocafella]

The gem that was dropped in this thread about setting the direction of what YOU want to do on a date was golden. Don't leave the decision making up to the female, you choose the activity and she's either with it or she can get going. to whoever made that statement.

 

[Turbulent]

The gem that was dropped in this thread about setting the direction of what YOU want to do on a date was golden. Don't leave the decision making up to the female, you choose the activity and she's either with it or she can get going. to whoever made that statement.

i remember Reincar speaking on this.

 

[m@jestic]

The gem that was dropped in this thread about setting the direction of what YOU want to do on a date was golden. Don't leave the decision making up to the female, you choose the activity and she's either with it or she can get going. to whoever made that statement.

It's also a good gauge of a womans interest level.

For example a female I've been dealing with has made it clear that she doesn't like going to a certain place so I told her I'm going to this place she doesn't like and asked if her if she wanted to come.

Of course she came along and didn't complain once.

 

[BreezyH]

It's also a good gauge of a womans interest level.

For example a female I've been dealing with has made it clear that she doesn't like going to a certain place so I told her I'm going to this place she doesn't like and asked if her if she wanted to come.

Of course she came along and didn't complain once.

 

[MikelArteta]

u want a guy too treat u right but then u shyt on the guy who treats u right and go too the guy who is an @sshole and get heartbroken and then proceed too go back too the guy who treated u right but that guy became a @sshole because you treated him like shyt and u get heartbroken again and then say there aint no good men when in return u started a new cycle of @sshole men cuz u shytted on the good guy cuz he treated u right and now he is an @sshole due too heartbreak

let that sink in your mind for a min when u say aint not good guys out there

ive always been that guy who treated them right, every girl i have ever dated has always tried to come back thats when you give em the :umadqueen:

 

[MikelArteta]

i remember Reincar speaking on this.

yep
any date I go on, its something I like/love to do

so say i never hear from teh person again, or im not feeling them im having a great time regardless and i planned on doing it regardless.

 

[MikelArteta]

Women’s relationships today follow a very
predictable pattern:

• They push men for commitment
• They get what they want
• They lose interest in sex
• They become attracted to someone else
• They start cheating
• They begin telling their partners that they need time apart
• They blame their partners for their behavior…and eventually, after a long time of vacillating back and forth, they end their relationships or marriages.

If you’re a male, like most other males, you would probably never suspect that your partner is cheating, not only because of your wife’s or girlfriend’s seeming disinterest in sex; but also because you have the belief that your wife or girlfriend is a “good girl.” Unfortunately, males are frequently left/divorced by their wives and girlfriends without ever knowing about their wives’ and girlfriends’ infidelities.

If you’re a female, like most other females, prior to cheating on your partner you always proclaimed yourself to be “not the type” who would ever cheat. However, also like most other females, after they have cheated, you’re shocked and appalled by your behavior; but at the same time you can’t stop cheating.

 

[Atlrocafella]

yep
any date I go on, its something I like/love to do

so say i never hear from teh person again, or im not feeling them im having a great time regardless and i planned on doing it regardless.

Headed to the movies soon, I know she wants to see best man holiday, but I'm gonna see hunger games 2 instead.. I win regardless

 

[kevm3]

Very interesting article in an arena where the dating dynamic is reversed
http://www.vagabondish.com/female-foreign-japan/

The reason so many women act up here is because of the extreme thirstiness of the men.

 

[Cape]

Should rename this thread "Official Misogyny thread"

 

[kevm3]

The behavior you will get from women is the behavior you will accept. As a man, you should be a leader ALL the time. Your leadership is not contingent on whether or not some woman will accept your leadership. In other words, you should be in firm control of your life at all times and know what you want and continually be in the process of making moves to handle your business. You do not magically fluctuate in and out of leadership based upon whether some particular woman gives you affirmation at some point in time. Either you are in control of your life and constantly demand headship or you don't.

Your mission is not to convince a woman why she should accept your leadership. Your job is to give her an opportunity to be under your leadership. There is a distinct difference there. Think about your job. Your boss isn't going to try to convince you to as to why you should do what he says. If you don't follow orders, you either will be fired or you won't get hired in the first place. It's the same thing with women. You don't attempt to convince them or argue with them as to why they should be under your leadership. You should always maintain that if they are to deal with you, then they will have to be under your leadership or else they don't get to deal with you... and it's important you stand on that principle or else you will never be accorded your proper respect.

 

[Un-AmericanDreamer]

You wrote this with insulting comments towards American men, sprinkled with conceited comments towards Japanese men and women.
It’s very disparaging.

And now you wonder why people respond in kind?
You set the tone with your own judgmental attitude.
You can try to take the words back or claim you’re just misunderstood, but it’s not a very convincing act.

Allow me to underscore some of the issues here.
1. You thought 9 months was a long time. You never even got past the first stage of living abroad before you gave up.
2. Women in Japan make the first move. It’s not America, you have to play by their rules. That means you have to swap roles with the American guy and take the initiative.
Giving “come hither” looks don’t count. In fact, it’s a laughable attempt. That’s what you do to encourage an American guy to take the initiative.
You have to do what you’d expect American men to do. Start with buying a gift, it need not be expensive. Valentines is to your favor in Japan.
3. All Japanese know foreigners, especially the women, are only there for a short time. As a result, it’s very rare the other party will seek a long-term relationship unless you go the extra mile.
Your method of approaching men somewhat randomly with “come hither” looks only encourages the view that you’re looking for a fling. If a fling was acceptable and you failed, well… you’re doing it wrong. Try again. Choose a target, and keep trying. You’ll succeed eventually. Undoubtedly much faster than an American man trying to pick up girls… we have to try to many more times. Get used to it if flings are your thing in Japan. In fact, I’d say get used to putting yourself on the line and learn to deal with rejection if you’re a woman in Japan.
4. Does hitting on random guys work for long-term relationships in America? I know when girls randomly hit on me in America, I’m not thinking long-term… just the possibilities of the next 12 hours.
Long-term relationships the world over are began through connections. Be it a common social group, work, or mutual friends. The latter is the rule in Japan. So much in Japan is done by word of mouth and mutual trust. The worst thing that can happen to anyone in Japan is to be ostracized.
Generally speaking, you need to meet people in serious settings to find people interested in serious relationships. This goes for any country.
5. For the previous to work, you need to make friends with local females. They will be your best resource to local males. You have to leave the comfort zone of the gaijin bubble. Your coworkers should be your first target for friend-making. Give them presents and show them respect, chances are you will be accepted.
The key to making friends with Japanese is showing honest consideration — not in words, in fact almost never in words. It must be done in small acts of kindness, with a smile. This is actually much easier for women in general. For a guy to gain acceptance is a little harder. We can’t just show up and be cute and hand out presents. It’s not appropriate behavior for a male (in any culture.) So use this liberally, make local friends. Leave the bubble.
If you can’t leave the bubble, you’re not interested in a serious relationship to begin with.
6. Your condescension towards Japanese men and women is very obvious. Japanese are very sensitive to condescension as it’s their primary means of insulting eachother (Americans tend towards sarcasm and facetiousness.)
Even if you say you’re not condescending, a lot of people here have picked up on it.
Other people clearly think you’re condescending… and if we think that due to a short blog you wrote on the internet, I guarantee you people will get that perception in real life.
It doesn’t matter if you’re not condescending — if they get that perception, you’re done. Work on it.
7. Carrying on with the perception issues, another is that Western Women are high maintenance. It doesn’t matter if it’s true or not, that is the world-wide perception going in. You need to beat that perception.

Ultimately my theory on why JPN female – Ame male works and is so prevalent is very simple:
- American men are expected to spoil women. To take all the responsibility and hand over all the spoils.
- Japanese women are expected to indulge men.
It works because *generally speaking* each party goes in expecting to give more than they get, and are thus pleased when they both receive more than they could otherwise expect.

On the flipside, the 2 cultures teach that Japanese men expect to be indulged and American women expect to be spoiled. American women may not realize this, but Japanese men are aware of it. This goes back to #7.
One of you has to give. In Japan, you have to play by their rules. So if you’re trying to figure it out — ask yourself “What would I expect a guy back home to do for me if I was in the local guy’s shoes?” If you want some perspective on how you appear… imagine you’re in America, and a Japanese guy with broken English and a weird accent hits on you in the same manner. Can you see why asking random guys for recommendations and giving come hither looks didn’t get you anywhere? That would get you ignored in America too, maybe even perceived as creepy or inappropriately forward and unwanted attention.
Our culture teaches us American guys that we’re expected to hold the door for you, treat you like daddy’s little princess, treat you like “equals” when decisions are made, listen to you for as long as you like, and take all the responsibility when it’s time to pay the bills or go the extra yard.
I don’t say this to be demeaning or rude, just so you can maybe get some perspective of what’s expected of you in Japan. You’re expected to go the extra yard in Japan.
You can call the situation in Japan sexist, but then you would be admitting the situation in America is reverse sexism by extension. I suggest you don’t dwell on the politics and do whatever is necessary. If you find a guy worth going the extra mile for, it’s not a problem right?

For a guy to seriously date Japanese women, we have to also get accustomed to different expectations. The difference is that, the expectations in our home country largely exceed those in Japan.
Secondly, we don’t deal with all of the perspective issues that American women have. Again, it doesn’t matter in either case if the perspective is true — what matters is that you understand the perspective exists and can cope with it in one form or another.
That might mean you prove the perception wrong. That might mean you win your partner over so they don’t mind if it’s true. You will want to take steps to mitigate those perceptions in the early stages, however. You may also express to your local friends your concerns. If they are considerate, you won’t need to ask them to put in a good word for you on those accounts.

Japanese, regardless of sex, are likely to treat Americans, regardless of sex, as play toys. Many of the American women seem to be very upset about this fact, as a lot of the expat guys don’t have a problem with such an arrangement. Thus you guys appear to get very jealous.
But I believe it’s fairly difficult for there to be a meaningful relationship across cultures. American men also have a lot of negative perceptions to work through and a longer and more difficult road in establishing local friends. The reality is that not a whole lot of Japanese want to move abroad permanently.

Finally, I’ll leave all the women with 1 thought here.
This thread has a lot of complaints from women abroad that they either get no attention in country X or too much attention in country Y.
You bounce between stereotyping men as “shy”, “intimidated” and then if they do pay attention you paint them as sex maniac perverts. It seems like no matter what, you take issue with how men treat you outside of America.
With this kind of attitude and stereotyping, how do you expect anyone from the opposite sex to take you seriously? To make a cross-cultural relationship work, it takes a lot of work and flexibility by both parties. The rewards are high, but it requires commitment and trust.

So long as these kinds of stereotypes are your perceptions of men abroad, you will never be able to establish the trust for such a relationship. The women who didn’t harbor these stereotypes are probably finding men in these countries and happy.


Read more at http://www.vagabondish.com/female-foreign-japan/#G9Q3MdAOMsfdyMWJ.99

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