Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

[EQ.]

What are the ways that a person can step up their conversation skills? not with just females, but with other people

Read books aloud to yourself. Sound weird but it works, i read a lot of philosophy, sports psychology and sales books aloud to myself and find that it is good practice for conversations ( and overall helps you understand and retain what you're reading as your having to read, analyze and recite ).

 

[CrossBones]

Probably the whole time , nah she said they don't hang up or meet up he was just a loser, but they were facebook friends, and they'd text.

I didn't want to be that "insecure" jealous type breh and i had female friends myself at the time so i was

be young and gullible brehs

yeah youre right bruh. when women text, talk about, or seem to spend a lot of their off time dealing with another guy, then thats her giving him attention - and you know how serious women feel about attention. they know how important it can be, and what it means


what it means is that the two are becoming more and more invested in each other. spending more of their thoughts, their time, and essentially more emotions on the other. the more involved a woman becomes in a mans life, the more attention she will give him, and thus, the more serious she is getting. and that time investment will always have value to a woman.


now as men, WE know that attention can be given out and it really doesnt have to mean anything. its just a time waster. we can buckshot it out when we feel like it. you do some chit chat here, bounce, and you did your part. now try that over here. and there. etc. now you have women feeding in to you. they like what you give them. its not always about money or resources in the beginning. especially if youre not some weak guy kissing ass, but youre manipulating a women for her attention. a lot of getting with a woman has to do with getting that attention. the trick is to not give her your attention, but to get her to give you hers. if you want to start geting a woman more involved with you, you get her to give you more and more attention. whether shes mad at you or thinks your good money, if shes thinking about you a lot, then youve successfully managed to begin prying her away from her relationship


now it is possible for a man and woman to be just friends, but the closer they get, and the more time they spend together, just means that the door is way more open for them to become more than that. it just takes the right time. and men know this, thats why they play the vulture during their pathetic "friendzone." I dont know why in society there are little boundaries in that. you can tell that both sides are being manipulative. what it boils down to is this: close, personal conversations shouldnt be shared between men and women who arent A. related or B. in a relationship. women need to stop airing out their dirty laundry for attention.



and men need to stop stepping on other people's relationship and leave those taken women alone. stop being


its well known that when a guy is always taking up the time of another mans woman, than the guy is making a move on her. in my pops day, if a man was constantly on the phone, talking to, or meeting up with another mans girl, hed get socked in the mouth for that shyt. its clear as day, hes moving in. and thats because its like this, as long as men and women like fukking each other, than the more likely its going to happen since theyre doing all this bonding and talking, opening up to each other all the time. and if in secret, its even more likely to happen as both parties know what theyre doing


women know this, they know that theyre keeping stand bys on hand. that theyre being selfish by being in a relationship, yet always seeking more and more attention from different men. tell me, whats the point of all that? so is it that she can be with you, but she cant talk to you anymore? then whats the point in being together? why all these secret convos with other men? because all that shyt shes talking to mr schemer over here could have been talked over with her friends, her mother, her family, her brothers, her cousin, or anybody else. but why this strange man? they know why

 

[CrossBones]

you can never control the outcome. i feel what you're saying but i feel like the way to reconcile everything is to not be invested so much in the outcome. this goes for everything in life but i'm gonna keep it about women for this convo.

when you talk about "missed opportunities", you gotta ask yourself, "opportunity for what?" and then ask yourself "why is it an opportunity?". You could want to have a woman for many reason. could be to fukk, could be to build, could be to love, could be to pimp, could be to abuse, could be whatever evil or good depending on who you are and what you stand for. whatever the case, the reason you want her is because you believe she would contribute to your happiness. but you getting the woman (the outcome) should not be the goal. the goal is your happiness. it's not the girl that's making you happy. it's the fact that she's doing XYZ that's helping you be happier. getting a specific woman is not the goal. the goal is to get a woman who does XYZ. Once you start thinking getting Lisa (the outcome) is the goal, you already lost. cause now you've made your happiness dependent on getting a specific woman (something you have slight influence over and no real control over). but if your goal becomes to find a woman you are attracted to who will do XYZ and cooperate then once you see potential, you go after it cause it's actually an opportunity. but if she isn't down for the play, that means her potential to contribute to your happiness is decreasing just by her not cooperating. if she isn't cooperating, why should we consider getting her a "desired outcome"?

it makes sense in my mind but i don't know how to put it into words...

thats really good, because it puts focus on your aims. sure we want opportunities, but what will it lead to? thats why its more about self mastery, and knowing what you want and how to go about it, then making another person your pawn. you put it out there, you say what you want, and take those who want to come with you. I dont believe in bending words or trying to make someone do something. thats the difference between control over you, and trying to get control over others

 

[CrossBones]

Why is having basic standards in this day and age considered being 'jealous' or 'insecure'? It just shows how backwards the morals of this generation is. If you don't let your woman have 10,000 male friends, go on exotic locales with her girls and a host of other utterly disrespectful behavior, apparently you're insecure or jealous. That's utter nonsense and is simply people who want to have someone, but don't really want to do what it takes to be successful in a relationship trying to flip the script and have you accept their nonsense.

this is how they changed our thinking, but on a surface level only. you make someone think that values and honestly is corny, and you can get away much easier with doing wrong. the only problem is, no matter what you call it, wrong is still wrong. you screw someone over and theyll know it. cant just label that away.

so earning trust, being honest with your partner about your concerns, and behaving in way thats respectful to your boundaries seems old fashioned and constricting. its also "insecurity" to ask for that. people treat it almost like, why do you want to be honest or know the truth? lol

yet, when people are breaking these old ways, theyre finding that theyre getting divorced a lot more, relationships dont last, and everybody is going out for themselves. if people feel like its easier to try this and that at any time, then they do it. since behaving in a respectful way isnt cool anymore, why should you respect your significant other, or even yourself? just go ahead and do what you want. pushing the line doent even mean anything to many people. both men and women are idolizing being hoes and always playing games, so being down for someone or being real is very rare these days.

 

[Fatboi1]

Now some random Croatian chick hits me up on that languagexchange site. Ain't no damn where on my profile mentions I'm learning Crotian. She sent me a hi message and I sent her back and she already adding me on facebook and yadda yadda.

 

[MikelArteta]

Now some random Croatian chick hits me up on that languagexchange site. Ain't no damn where on my profile mentions I'm learning Crotian. She sent me a hi message and I sent her back and she already adding me on facebook and yadda yadda.

you eating breh

 

[MikelArteta]

just rambling.........

What message would you give to younger men?

As a man the older you get the easier it becomes to meet and attract women of all different demographics. Once you gain experience and set standards and boundaries, many women that you were so enamoured with in the past would not even qualify for the basic requirements you have set for yourself. You will come to the realization that wow there is a gluttony of women out there, and why did I ever waste so much time chasing and struggling to get over women who departed.

So then why are you single if there are a gluttony of woman out there?

I said women not quality women………A quality woman is hard to find – “She is more precious than rubies”. I’ve been with drop dead gorgeous women with curves in all the right places, successful women with fancy designations but were they all quality by my definition? Sadly rarely, they were beautiful yep, they were smart yep and as a young man I was so entranced. It’s so easy regardless of your age as a man to get so caught up in a woman’s beauty that you become blinded by her attractiveness and the allure/infatuation/lust and enter a relationship without taking the proper protocol of figuring out her personality and whether she is worthy of your time. In the beginning every women that is attracted to you will try to impress, she’s not like that, the qualities she exudes in the “glow phase” will have you caught up so fast before you even know it. However just because she is beautiful and you “click” does not mean that she is sent from the heavens and is good for you.

So what do you advise?

I advise men to screen, be patient and not get caught up by beauty, sex, or words that don’t equate to actions. Choosing the wrong woman can literally destroy your life while choosing a quality woman can elevate it to new heights.

Secondly I advise men to make sure the women you want to commit to and settle down with is a woman who is ready to take on that role and has the traits you desire in a woman, and you see this through her actions.

So how do you know if she is a good women?

The standards and definition of what is a good women is different to everyone. But look at her characteristics, is she loyal, dignified, compassionate, responsible, trustworthy, humble, honest to start. If she still wants to party, club, bar-hop, talk to a bunch of men, enjoys drama and living of the attention currency well yeah – would you attempt to domesticate a cobra? To save yourself some stress have boundaries and those who don’t reach it leave them in the wild.

So stay away from beautiful woman?

Nope never implied that at all. I have met beautiful women who were great woman and of quality – I was just implying not to be blinded by beauty and overlook character traits. Beauty is fleeting and a woman no matter how beautiful she is now will only maintain that beauty for so long. Now if you find a beautiful woman that meet the standard excellent.

 

[Fatboi1]

you eating breh

Not yet.. These chicks are way too far away for now. The japanese one I can see things happening with as she plans to come up here and vice versa for me. This one is just random so far. I haven't really seen what's up with her yet.

 

[MikelArteta]

Got too many, from taking bytches out that werent worth it to being angry at declining cooperation levels

I just stopped digging deeper simp holes, and ive never looked back

Deleting my reserve team, and building my Rome again with excellence

its crazy how we all live in different cities/countries/ages/races/religion deal with different women but its the same song and dance when dealing with women

 

[Swing]

I usually agree and amplify when women make statements about me, did it in this case aswell but I've never heard this one before:

"It seems like you're vain"

Anyone else ever get hit with this?

 

[kevm3]

One of the hardest things to do, but necessary is to let go of things we know are going sour. When a woman starts checking out, I think we got to man up and let it go. The average guy will double up and try to up her interest levels, but more times than not, she's ready to move on and you'll just be the fall-back option.

This ties in well with learning to be alone because I think sometimes you just have to accept that you'll be by yourself. A lot of dudes, instead of being alone, do anything for scraps of female attention, which ultimately result in giving attention to women cheaply. This results in women devaluing men. The only reason a lot of these women can get away with the stuff they do is because they have 10,000 backups or know they can get new male attention easily. Do you think she'd be so quickly to check-out if she knew that no man was going to pay her attention for a long time? Men are simply interchangeable now because they make themselves that way. They sell their product, which is their attention and time, way too cheaply. I think a lot of these women would think twice about cutting plans short and flaking if she felt actual repercussions for doing so and couldn't easily rope the guy back in as if nothing happened.

 

[MikelArteta]

Opposites Attract

People with bad character traits want a partner with good character traits
Cheaters want a monogamous partner
Players want someone they can play
Liars want someone honest who will believe their lies
Manipulators want someone they can manipulate
Charmers want someone they can charm
Untrustworthy people want someone they can trust

 

[MikelArteta]

One of the hardest things to do, but necessary is to let go of things we know are going sour. When a woman starts checking out, I think we got to man up and let it go. The average guy will double up and try to up her interest levels, but more times than not, she's ready to move on and you'll just be the fall-back option.

This ties in well with learning to be alone because I think sometimes you just have to accept that you'll be by yourself. A lot of dudes, instead of being alone, do anything for scraps of female attention, which ultimately result in giving attention to women cheaply. This results in women devaluing men. The only reason a lot of these women can get away with the stuff they do is because they have 10,000 backups or know they can get new male attention easily. Do you think she'd be so quickly to check-out if she knew that no man was going to pay her attention for a long time? Men are simply interchangeable now because they make themselves that way. They sell their product, which is their attention and time, way too cheaply. I think a lot of these women would think twice about cutting plans short and flaking if she felt actual repercussions for doing so and couldn't easily rope the guy back in as if nothing happened.

yep
this is why its vital as a man to value yourself and stand firm to what you are.

Deep down if may not be today, a few weeks or months or years from now a woman will respect your decision.

The last girl I somewhat dated she went distant and all that and I just said ok and departed, 6 months went by and then she popped up , i'm pretty sure if i begged and grovelled for another chance or used seal tricks to draw her back in I woul dhave porbably never heard from again.

There are a million guys out there but there is only one you

 

[MikelArteta]

When I was weak......

It was over and I accepted it was for the best, yet day after day I would sign into Facebook and head straight to her page for my daily updates of the on goings in her life. It became my reading the newspaper with a bagel in my house robe daily ritual. Ah I already knew I would feel like crap afterwards and see something I did not want to see but I just could not help myself the urge was so strong and I just gave in – take me ahh. Day after day I got my fix, the highs ah then once that dissipated the lows of feeling miserable, sad, and angry at myself.

No mas, No more I would say as I would hold out for a few days or weeks and then the withdrawal – oh let me just take a quick glance and there I would be, catching up on everything I missed – Binge snooping so to speak. Who are these new guys she’s adding? Wow all these guys are so thirsty and pathetic! Who are those people she’s taking photos with? That stomach churning feeling in my belly ah she’s still single……Oh Crap she’s now in a relationship?

Why the heck I’m I viewing this guy’s page? I don’t even know him but hate him already. Why the hell are my “friends” clicking like on their photos together? It doesn’t matter it won’t even last yep he’s just a rebound would soothe my thoughts. I’m so much better looking in each and every way. Here I was wishing the worst on someone I once said I cared about how fake I was.

Argh I can’t stop looking, let me find the hottest girl I can and start dating and take photos and make it my display photo – manipulation tactics 101. Ah look she’s single again karma haha. This was no way to live but I was so consumed and could not let go (insert I probably needed therapy).

Until one day I finally had my wakeup call. Why am I wasting so much precious time and attention on this so I just defriended and blocked. Of course it was hard but I fought through it and filled my mind with much more joyous thoughts as I stopped trying to hold onto the façade that I could be “friends” even on Facebook. Went straight cold turkey and never peered again, as the weeks turned into months and months to years I never looked again and it was one of the best decisions I ever made.

 

[Atlrocafella]

Just because I had a good date this weekend, doesn't mean that I'm done with meeting new people