Essential Quick Lil Gems on Dealing with Women

RealCrownHeights

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My mistake, I misread this and all the other posts you've made about your situation.

So please make it clear.

Which one is it?

50/50 or 70/40? (70/40 don't even add up to 100....)

It really doesn't make sense for you to be with this chick if this his how you're gonna approach the finances.
We started dating, she didn't pay for anything intially, mind you on like the 3rd date we went to like four places. I said, damn are you gonna offer to pay at least for like one drink or a coffee or something? After that the relationship with like 70/30 (my mistake on the numbers) we lived seperately but I would pay for most dates and stuff, she would get the little things (even though she still didn't want too.) She had an expectation for me to pay her nails and other shyt too, i shut that down and paid when I felt like it or when she had trips or birthday I would buy the weave etc. I was making $55-$60k between this time btw. We moved in together and we got engaged, the bills are split 50/50 but that's not really accurate also because: I buy the groceries, we both cook. I buy the cleaning supplies and clean the bathroom (she hates cleaning the bathroom) We both do the laundry. i also pay for dry cleaning once a month and like i said an expensive engagement ring, expensive sneakers and Valentines Day is in a few weeks. Then she want's to go to Brazil and we have a wedding to plan.
 

skyrunner1

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I wanna apologize to you for my misreading his scenario...

But now that I have clarity, it makes even less sense.

*He was always dealing with someone that was selfish and less financially able.

Why he mad now that she's being who she's always been, especially that he's proposed?
I see WIA finally got a nomination, they screwed him out of 5 bloods.. Hope he gets the dub..
 

WIA20XX

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We started dating, she didn't pay for anything intially, mind you on like the 3rd date we went to like four places. I said, damn are you gonna offer to pay at least for like one drink or a coffee or something? After that the relationship with like 70/30 (my mistake on the numbers) we lived seperately but I would pay for most dates and stuff, she would get the little things (even though she still didn't want too.) She had an expectation for me to pay her nails and other shyt too, i shut that down and paid when I felt like it or when she had trips or birthday I would buy the weave etc. I was making $55-$60k between this time btw. We moved in together and we got engaged, the bills are split 50/50 but that's not really accurate also because: I buy the groceries, we both cook. I buy the cleaning supplies and clean the bathroom (she hates cleaning the bathroom) We both do the laundry. i also pay for dry cleaning once a month and like i said an expensive engagement ring, expensive sneakers and Valentines Day is in a few weeks. Then she want's to go to Brazil and we have a wedding to plan.

Again, I want to apologize, I misread your situation

I thought you changed up.

I was wrong.

I say this respectfully,
  • You pursued a relationship with this woman
  • You paid the majority of the date costs
  • She expected beauty maintenance costs
  • You moved in together
  • You pay for more than your fair share of bills and chores
  • You bought her luxury gifts
She has not changed up.

She's been selfish and entitled from the very beginning.

She is not taking direction from you, even though you're holding everything down when all is said and done.

This money hungry chick was like from the start, throughout the relationship, up until now.

And You have enabled it, encouraged it,...literally financed it.

Now, after all this time, she wants more /she wants EVEN more - and now you're finally mad about it.

Why would her behavior change if this is how she's always been?

Real question - Do you honestly think that she's going to change after you get married?

She's not going to change.

This is who she is.

This relationship is fundamentally broken.

You need to leave.
You need to seek counseling to understand why your heart won't listen to your head.
 

Amo Husserl

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Just gotta say I blocked a shot with a jawn that could have been down...

1*wXgSrrkoe5B4VystKwbLpQ.gif
 

Ahadi

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Again, I want to apologize, I misread your situation

I thought you changed up.

I was wrong.

I say this respectfully,
  • You pursued a relationship with this woman
  • You paid the majority of the date costs
  • She expected beauty maintenance costs
  • You moved in together
  • You pay for more than your fair share of bills and chores
  • You bought her luxury gifts
She has not changed up.

She's been selfish and entitled from the very beginning.

She is not taking direction from you, even though you're holding everything down when all is said and done.

This money hungry chick was like from the start, throughout the relationship, up until now.

And You have enabled it, encouraged it,...literally financed it.

Now, after all this time, she wants more /she wants EVEN more - and now you're finally mad about it.

Why would her behavior change if this is how she's always been?

Real question - Do you honestly think that she's going to change after you get married?

She's not going to change.

This is who she is.

This relationship is fundamentally broken.

You need to leave.
You need to seek counseling to understand why your heart won't listen to your head.

Absolutely.

How you start is how you finish.

The fact that she didn’t offer / match your energy shows she’s not crazy about you. He needs somebody who is enthusiastic about him.

She’s lukewarm at best and it’s not a situation he deserves to be in.
 

Ahadi

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Man after my relationship ended early last year i couldn't imagine having as much fun as i am now. Thank god that relationship ended

Real talk. Wouldn’t be in another one for a very long time. Not in 2026
 

Astroslik

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We started dating, she didn't pay for anything intially, mind you on like the 3rd date we went to like four places. I said, damn are you gonna offer to pay at least for like one drink or a coffee or something? After that the relationship with like 70/30 (my mistake on the numbers) we lived seperately but I would pay for most dates and stuff, she would get the little things (even though she still didn't want too.) She had an expectation for me to pay her nails and other shyt too, i shut that down and paid when I felt like it or when she had trips or birthday I would buy the weave etc. I was making $55-$60k between this time btw. We moved in together and we got engaged, the bills are split 50/50 but that's not really accurate also because: I buy the groceries, we both cook. I buy the cleaning supplies and clean the bathroom (she hates cleaning the bathroom) We both do the laundry. i also pay for dry cleaning once a month and like i said an expensive engagement ring, expensive sneakers and Valentines Day is in a few weeks. Then she want's to go to Brazil and we have a wedding to plan.
Bruh you have a chance to get out of this.

RUN
 

MicIsGod

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So, my fiancee makes 97k, I made 98k until this month where I got a raise at 115k. We live together, and we split bills everything etc about 50/50 and we are in NYC. She told me she wants me to pay more rent now that I got a raise, we got into a big argument and she said she's tired of us being roomates etc.and I said I wasn't paying more. For context, she got laid off and I moved in with her before she got a new job, she lived and paid the rent for a year and a half alone by herself. I proposed a week before Christmas, (very expensive ring) and bought her bottega venetta sneakers for christmas etc. everything ceased, she's been the nicest and receptive like I've ever seen after that. Until tonight, where I said I don't want to be a provider and pay for everything. I said if I made $250 or $350k and she made $100k or $80k etc I would pay all but we are not that far apart right now. She got mad all over again, I just camre back from the bar. I asked what do provider men get in return and she mentioned cooking and cleaning, which I do already, and I don't think that's an equal exchange. I said I would be a contributor and we can help each other. I was upfront from the beginning after the 4th date way back then, I said umm are you gonna pay for this one? and she said she should have never paid it that time. Idk what world she thinks she's lviing in or what type of fantasty land she lives in, but I'm not going for this. When I marry her, I inherit her massive student loans, and like I said i just bout expensive ass ring and designer sneakers and I have to pay for a wedding that I rather just sign the doucment for. Am I tripping right now or what?
My thing is, what is she supposed to do with all her money while you pay everything? lol just save everything while you drain your account?
 

Ahadi

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My thing is, what is she supposed to do with all her money while you pay everything? lol just save everything while you drain your account?

Girls trip / exit strategy / plan new life / social media post saying “she did it all herself” & she’s a skrong woman

Surprised she doesn’t know what a “push present” is
 

PrnzHakeem

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We started dating, she didn't pay for anything intially, mind you on like the 3rd date we went to like four places. I said, damn are you gonna offer to pay at least for like one drink or a coffee or something? After that the relationship with like 70/30 (my mistake on the numbers) we lived seperately but I would pay for most dates and stuff, she would get the little things (even though she still didn't want too.) She had an expectation for me to pay her nails and other shyt too, i shut that down and paid when I felt like it or when she had trips or birthday I would buy the weave etc. I was making $55-$60k between this time btw. We moved in together and we got engaged, the bills are split 50/50 but that's not really accurate also because: I buy the groceries, we both cook. I buy the cleaning supplies and clean the bathroom (she hates cleaning the bathroom) We both do the laundry. i also pay for dry cleaning once a month and like i said an expensive engagement ring, expensive sneakers and Valentines Day is in a few weeks. Then she want's to go to Brazil and we have a wedding to plan.
Logged in to comment that you a victim.

Get your ring back

She wants a trade wife relationship but wants you to pay for the wedding, too?

Run nikka run
 

The ADD

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Logged in to comment that you a victim.

Get your ring back

She wants a trade wife relationship but wants you to pay for the wedding, too?

Run nikka run
I
Logged in to comment that you a victim.

Get your ring back

She wants a trade wife relationship but wants you to pay for the wedding, too?

Run nikka run
I’ll damned
 
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